To think it’s not ‘cruel’ to take DD to the gym at 7.30am

[Eastie77Returns]

I attend an early gym class every Saturday morning. I leave the house around 7am.

I leave DS and DD at home with DP. He takes DS to football practice around 9am and DD tags along but she has become increasingly unhappy about having to go. I therefore gave her 2 other choices: come to the gym with with me or stay at home alone for 10/15 minutes as I’m home from the gym by 9.15-am latest. This morning I asked her what she wanted to do (I gave her the options earlier in the week so she had time to consider). She began complaining loudly saying none of the options were good ones and she just wanted me to stay at home with her. I explained that I was not prepared to miss my class and in the end she decided to come with me. As we were leaving DP began muttering that’s it’s unfair and cruel to drag her to a gym at the crack of dawn when Saturday morning should be her down time.

If it makes any difference, it’s a David Lloyd gym. DD is a member and she enjoyed a breakfast in the restaurant area and read a book while I did my class. She played with another girl in the play area and the two of them have signed up for a taster kids class so she was fine. But I’ve now received a text from my dad saying he’s heard (obviously from DP) from that “poor DD is being dragged to a gym on Saturdays” so she can stay with him on Friday evenings if she prefers. Obviously I would be expected to drop off and pick her up. I said no.

AIBU to think this is a load of fuss about absolutely nothing?

We are members of DL and my son comes with us for a family gym/swim on a Saturday morning. This is NOT an issue.

This thread has entertained me, wound me up and angered me in fairly equal proportions!! There are clearly some deeply weird people out there. I love the one who admitted prioritising her career over her kids and thinks you can't have 45 minutes a WEEK, @Eastie77Returns. The hypocrisy is breathtaking!

You need to put your foot down about driving. He obviously can do it, and has. I thought he never drove. He's putting such pressure on you!

This is utter batshit.

@Eastie77Returns

keep going to the gym ! DD has a choice.

think you need to kick your DH to the kerb tho, that is some serious piss taker there.

Will you ever listen to yourself? Your posts are like a badly scratched, stuck record of a not-very-good artist!

I think an eleven year old is fine to be left at home for 15 minutes. If she doesn't want to be left alone, she will need to accompany you to the gym. At eleven, I would stay home.

I agree - it's batshit crazy, it's off the bloody scale crazy!!

The OP isn't putting her child up chimneys to clean them!! 7am is a reasonable time to get up. Lie-ins are not mandatory. She can go to bed earlier if she needs her sleep. Her daughter isn't frightened either because she's not being left at home. Stop being so damn dramatic!

I don't think you would recognise "parenting 101" if it got up and smacked you on the arse! I can't imagine the precocious spoilt little articles you're rearing, with that attitude.

If your daughter has a class of her own every Saturday why don’t you go to your gym during that?

And no I don’t think it’s ok to take her and then leave her unattended in a gym.

And no I don’t think it’s ok to leave her home alone either. My neighbours keep leaving their young son, 8 or 9, at home alone for about an hour and and a half on weekdays. Sadly for me I’ve noticed as their drive is outside my lounge and now I’m forever trying to gauge if he’s ok locked in the house alone 😰

Shes your daughter, it’s your job to look after her. I was a lone parent with no help but my son was never left alone.

You could tell DH that he's welcome to take DD to your dad's if he prefers, but you would have thought that if he is going to drive then driving your DS to footie after you get back would be easier.

This thread is absolutely bonkers.

YANBU, OP.

You keep going to your class and let your DD decide whether she's going to come with you at 7am or stay at home.

If your partner has a problem with this then he has to stay at home with her until you get back and then drive your son to football in the car like a fucking adult.

crack on, OP! I think it’s good that kids realise that their parents have hobbies too and the world doesn’t revolve around them. Sitting in a cafe, reading a book or the other things you said she can do there are perfectly fine. My mum used to take me to the gym with her when I was about your DD’s age and it was a bit boring to begin with but I eventually got interested in it and when I was old enough would join her in a work out! Enjoy!

🤣🤣🤣

I have to say that, while I agree OP can and should be allowed the tine to get to the gym if that’s how she wants to spend it, I do think the timing of it is problematic.

I know someone responded that she can’t go at any other time slot other than 7:30 am on a Saturday but they didn’t repeat the reason and frankly the thread has got a bit long to trawl through now.

Someone else pointed out about Saturday school and said that ( for some reason) their dcs got up at 6 am. Ours have Saturday school and it is without doubt the one misgiving all the parents have about an otherwise great school ( even though we make sure they can sleep longer than 6 on a Saturday). But they all get really tired when they start it and even the school normally give every third weekend ( sometimes every second) as an exeat because of this very issue. For this reason I struggle to understand why anyone would willingly disrupt every Saturday ( no exeats) for a child that age. It isn’t the idea of the child fitting in with others plans that bothers me in the least; but I do agree with this poster that ensuring they have time to rest at weekends is important.

The OP has already explained that, for the challenged of comprehension.

Do you know any 11 year olds? Plenty of them meet up in town, go to the cinema, any number of things at that age. She's hardly going to get kidnapped or whatever ill you think might befall her from DL!

8 or 9 is too young, I agree, but 15 minutes at age 11 is perfectly reasonable.

This is really rudely written.

Well then she should stay in the house, go with her dad, or the useless arse of a man could drive. End of.

And don't be a hypocrite seeing as your kids do it for their "great school"!! I wouldn't have sent my children to a school that did Saturdays, both for their sake and my own!

People aren’t “challenged of comprehension” because they express a view at odds with yours .

Firstly, it’s not the gym, it’s a scheduled exercise class. The OP (and many other posters) have made this very clear. So she can’t just go when her daughter is at her activity.

And following your anecdote of your neighbour’s son…

She’s not 8 or 9, she’s 11. Possibly closer to 12 if she’s an Autumn baby.

And it’s not an hour and a half most/every weekday, it’s a 10 or 15 minutes once a week.

So it’s not really comparable, is it?

And I doubt your son was ‘never’ left alone. He just wasn’t left alone until he was older than 11.

It’s not being a hypocrite. Op posted asking what people thought. That’s what I think and I’m saying it.

I don’t like the fact ours don’t always get a lie in. We leave them sleeping until the last possible minute and let them lie in until 8 or 9 ( whenever they wake) on the exeats. So that’s my view .

What have your neighbours children at 8 & 9 got to do with OP?

OP you are not being remotely unreasonable. Keep doing what you're doing, I am staggered by a lot of these responses!

Really?

Really.

You might not like it - but you do it. I wouldn't have. There's the difference.

😃