To be completely shocked about someone I used to know

[EWAB]

When my youngest was at primary school I really liked this woman who had kids either side of mine.

She was in the PTA equivalent and was just a nice woman. There was no drama around her.

I remember having a day off and went into the local cafe, and she invited me to sit with her friends. She was funny, warm and witty.

Significantly, she had friends of all ethnicities and her best friend was Asian.

Everybody will relate to being busy but I think if it was a different time in my life or we had kids in same year we would have been mates.

I am absolutely shocked that she is a member of a right wing political party and has a presence in that party, utterly and completely shocked.

I know it’s not illegal but God.

All three of my siblings are Tories, I’m not someone who thinks everyone has to think like me but I am stunned.

Mumsnet hates this, but I have had a physical reaction to the news. I am just Gobsmacked and weirdly let down and I do know that’s a stupid, irrational thing to say.

Tribalism isn’t a distraction from politics—its the essence of politics. Just some groups take it very literally (The Afrikaners for example) while others see it more as a metaphor.

I felt really ill when I realised what she is like.

Yet you have nothing but praise for her.

OP. The world is not just black and white, just bad and good. Grow up. For the sake of your children if nothing else.

You're pretty hyperbolic yourself.

You've chosen to respond personally to a general comment. If you yourself are confident, my comment doesn't apply to you. I was talking about people who feel 'patronised'.

Yes of course the cultures are different. That’s rather the point. I am s former anthropologist so I hang out here precisely because culture is my jam and Im interested in English/british culture and politics (writ large to include the anti-politics cult of just having “reasonable” opinions without having to be responsible for actual policy execution).

So you haven't got much of a clue then have you?

When you talk of fascism when it comes to UK party politics you are talking from an academic rather than literal view point.

I live here. I'm also educated to a high level.

There are no mainstream UK political parties that are extreme right wing or fascist.

As an anthropologist I would have thought you'd understand the need to reserve labels like that for genuinely authoritarian regimes?

Quite. Either Mumsnet users have become markedly less intelligent recently or we have been invaded by some reform campaigners.

I miss the days when most users were well informed. No one intelligent gives any credence to a party like reform.

but this is ridiculous.

You don't think that intelligent people can hold different political views to you?

Do you realise it is you that seems ill-informed by coming out with this?

That just hyperbole.

There is no cannibalism party, so the OPs acquaintance won't be voting for its candidate. There is no legal party which has a platform of fascism, so she won't be able to cast her vote for that either. So it's irrelevant .

Also, anyone who remembers Moseley would also remember Mussolini and Hitler, what with them being contemporaries.

Exactly that. Some of their policies are straight from fairy land. Exempting all frontline healthcare workers from basic rate income tax? Seriously? It’s pure fantasy.

It was a response to something I had said.

If it was a general comment why did you quote me?

Either way listening to others rather that being righteous is the only way to solve political differences. That is my overriding point.

Whereas some women have penises is completely normal?

People can hold any views they like.

The policies of Reform are not credible. They are shallow policies which would not work in reality.

I don't vote reform.

But that being said I wouldn't deride their politics. What I would do if I wanted to engage on a level with a reform voter would be to find the similarities in our views and have a conversation.

Belittling those with different political views is never going to win them over.

The comment you are referring to quoted no one.

I agree listening to others is important, I have for example listened carefully to Reform's policies which has helped me understand why they are not credible.

So why are you so worried about them and people who want to vote for them?

At the moment I don't find the Labour party credible because of their stance on women's rights.

I really wish they'd listen to my views rather than imply that I'm stupid or a bigot.

My position is their policies are not credible. That is not belittling, it is just an opinion.

My view is their policies are deliberately simplistic and not grounded in the reality of how the world works.

If you are a Labour voter do you find the opinion of Starmer that some women have a penis credible?

Do you think that is grounded in reality?

Do you understand how some women have left the left?

I don't understand why you interpret me as 'worried' about them.

I responded to a post about them, on a chat thread, to say their policies were not credible.

I'll ask again:

The leader of the opposition party says that some women have penises?

Do you find this to be credible and grounded in reality?

Would you please direct your anger towards someone else? I'm not a spokesperson for the left or the right.

I'm not angry.

I'm trying to have a conversation.

Why don't you want to talk about these things? You have come on to say that Reform UK have policies that are not credible.

I'm asking if you think that the Labour position on women is credible.

Why don't you want to talk?

In response to OP, YANBU. I have a colleague who is lovely, like chatting to them and always got on well. One day they randomly said how it was awful immigrants were getting benefits, that we should put British people first and the Rwanda plan couldn't come soon enough!
I was genuinely shocked, but on speaking to other colleagues, this person is known for having rather right wing views and you just have to steer them away from politics if they start as no-one else in the office agrees, so it's that, an awkward silence or a political debate that no-one really wants to get into at work!

Stupid viewpoint. What you’re saying is that in your opinion, only people who vote the same as you do are good people, and everyone else is bad. And I’m therefore assuming you’re Labour, as it’s Labour supporters who don’t like others having a different opinion than themselves.

YANBU OP.

this woman must have serious cognitive dissonance to not see how the policies of a bunch of loons like Reform wouldn't harm the very members of the school and wider community she's been working on behalf of.

She's either stupid or in denial.

Or both.

@lifeturnsonadime
I'd be more interested to discuss whether the idea of having zero NHS waiting lists within two years is credible.

The NHS has never had zero waiting lists. It is total magical thinking. The expense of a system with so much excess capacity that there could be no waiting list would be enormous.

This is what I meant about policies designed to sound appealing to those who do not know how things work in reality.

Plus the conflicting policy of tax relief on private health insurance, plus no tax to be paid by NHS staff! These are policies spun from nonsense. The costs and lost tax revenue are huge.