To say no to Fortnite?

[wtafwtaf]

I'm a teacher and have some awareness of various games and what they're like for children. We said no to Roblox but yes to Minecraft. No mobile phone yet and hoping to eek that out. I bloody hate YouTube for various reasons; he's allowed a timed amount occasionally.

He has lots of friends and is very sporty, arty, into stem, also goes to scouts. Plays guitar and enjoys messing about with his guitar on his own. Doing well at school.

11 yr old claims "everyone has Fortnite ." I don't think this is true but apparently a few close friends have now got it. Others got it ages ago. I know it's the sort of thing that lead to them arranging to play and being stuck in a team game. I've read it's really addictive.

Is it terrible to say no? Despite all the activities he does I feel he's on screens too much in the house.

The additional issue is that he's a much younger brother who's looking over his shoulder a lot.

I don't know much about our Fortnite, but please please don't stop him doing age appropriate things because of younger sibling. That always happened to me growing up and I resented it so much

I hold the line too, no to Fortnite, 12yo. To me it’s just a killing game, and very addictive.
many 10yo do have it, but I never liked it.
There are many similar games online so I’m not sure it’s successful I’m not allowing it. He does occasionally ask for it but I say no. Mostly say yes and he has fairly free access, but also does sports, other stuff. And comes off computers/ gaming when asked, which is important to me.

I think it’s fine to hold decisions that are right for you/your family

I have a 10 year old and we are very firm that he is not allowed to play Fortnite.

The very large majority of his friends are allowed to play it and when I hear about all the repercussions and the arguments between the other boys, and the horrendous behaviour and language that they display it just makes me and my husband very glad that our son has nothing to do with it.

100 agree with this but Fortnite doesn't count as an age appropriate thing!

He's out and about on his own locally. Goes to the shops by himself etc. allowed lots of things the younger one isn't.

I don't allow Fortnite for my 11 year old. The parents of kids who play it that we know say it's a nightmare getting them off it etc.

That's what I've heard.

Thanks for all your posts, it's really helpful to hear.

We are really relaxed about a lot of things but some things I do good the line with.

*hold

My son plays it, and he is 8. He plays with his friends, and they are fine. They occasionally have silly squabbles, but they always make up. I'm fine with him playing it, but if you don't want your son to, say no!

Well I must be the only parent who's kids played Fortnite. Started at 8 and now nearly 13, my son and his friends don't really play it now. It's not even that bad. Any child can get addicted to playing any game it's all about regulation.

My 11 year old engages with lots of friends via Fortnite. It's a huge social thing for him. He is however autistic. He would miss out a little on the social side by not playing. But, it really is very addictive. The violence doesn't bother me too much. Some Roblox games are worse. What I notice with Fortnite is how angry it can make kids. My rule is if you rage you are off it. He regulates that really well now and comes off.

If it works for you I say do what is right for your family and don't listen to the crowds. In my son's class half play and half don't. Your child won't be the only one not on it so stand your ground. It might be worth looking at game playing online to help inform your decision if you aren't always sure.

They started meeting on a local field last year to play various sports games. The weather has been so bad they've not managed for ages. I'd far rather he carried on doing that than meeting online

My son prefers to do the same now. He made the choice himself. But when the weather is poor he loves to play online.

Sometimes a trial could work but I understand you might open the floodgates there 🤷‍♀️😀

No Fortnite here (11yo) but then we only have one iPad between 3 children, one TV and a PS4 with very limited games and they aren't played online. I've had him ask me a few times but he accepts the answer is no.

Plenty of time for all that and I'll reconsider as he gets a bit older.

** he doesn't have a mobile phone either.

Have You ever seen Minecraft bed wars? Lots of ‘killing’ like Fortnite.

Maybe wait until secondary school if he’s currently in year 6.

My son started playing a few years ago when he was 10. Our rule was he only played with and added people he knew face to face. He's 14 now and still sticks to it, asks can he add such and such people cause they're cousins of a friend/classmate/kid off the road. Never had an issue with him becoming addicted to it because he has his times he's allowed on the Xbox.

Yes and he's done that!

It's not the killing so much as the format

The thing is that Minecraft is also on a time Limit on an iPad. So it can be limited.

From what I know it's not so easy to stop playing Fortnite?

With Fortnite, you can't pause it so if you want to go out and say off now, you will absolutely get ' but I'm in the middle of a game '. So yes it's a pain for that I feel.
I give a ten minute warning and I don't care where in the game you are. This is a downside to Fortnite

We went for age appropriate eating games. Ds1 (autistic, adhd) begged for Fortnite and seeing what it did to a friend's (autistic) son, I said not until 13. He hit 13 last year and only recently asked for it again so we said yes. He still has time limits etc on his games as he cannot self regulate gaming time. Unfortunately, ds1 turned into an aggressive, argumentative A-hole. Demanding to finish his game even though he'd need given his usual warning of X minutes before transitioning to meal/shower/bed. He got physically aggressive in a way we'd never seen before either. I can't say it was definitely the game but it mirrored my friend's experience with her son. When we sat DS1 down and told him we didn't like what he was doing, and that we were banning him from playing the game, he lost his temper big time.

However, since banning the game, we have ds1 back to his usual self. He plays plenty of other games but I think the competitive nature/last man standing of Fortnite was too much for his immaturity.

Yanbu. There will be no fortnite in my house. I don't really care if it makes him less popular.

Im finding more and more parents taking the same line

Have an 11 year old. I'm pretty sure his entire class play Fortnite, including most of the girls. No real issues here, the rule is you rage, you come off. And I am very firm with it.

I didn't let mine play until they were over 12. Unfortunately now they are behind their peers when it comes to playing skills and always the "crap" one on the team.

None of them play excessively, but perhaps that might be different had they been playing longer and were considered good players among their friends.

My ds had this at 8 and had outgrown and was bored of it by 9. He plays video games very rarely now at 12. We didn’t find fortnite addictive at all for him. He played very nicely with a few friends during lockdowns but always had a take it or leave attitude where he wasn’t bothered.

so I am not really sure it’s all that big a deal.

But a game/round is about 20 mins