Have I just been dumped before we even began ??

[utsjustnavy]

Chatting to a man for last week. Met twice and got on great. Shared a kiss. Went for dinner earlier . Great evening and great company. Things got steamy. We kissed etc and chatted. He shared his fantasy of another in the bedroom .. a female... in context of conversation..

when I challenged him on this and said well how do you feel about a male , he said no problem as long as he didn't have to be intimate with him etc. yet he had hoped I'd be interested in a female ..
I said I had no interest in that really but especially if he had no interest in doing the same either .

That was that.
We had kisses and fun but nothing heavy .

I text to thank him for a lovely evening and also said that as his fantasies wouldn't t be realised by me , if he wanted to let things go, that was perfectly fine.
He replied saying the pleasure was all his and we' ll keep in touch ( we're both busy for the next few weekends )
I answered with take care and he said .. you too...
have I just been dumped here ???

If I were you, I'd hope so. He sounds pathetic.

Hopefully. He sounds awful.

I have no problem with others wishes etc but these aren't for me. I'm just wondering if his responses indicate that I've been discarded by him
For this reason?

And thanks for responding!

How could anyone know this? We aren't him.

I guess that I had hoped , objectively , that a poster could give me an opinion based on his responses after I challenged him on it !

You said if he wanted to let things go that's fine by you...what were you expecting?

Your relationship with this man had barely begun and he was already telling you that you're not enough.

Good fucking riddance to him.

Dude's talking threesomes before you've even had a twosome....

I had said if he wanted to let things go based on the fact that his fantasies would never be realised by me ...

He’s accepted the ‘way out’ you gave him.

I don’t know why you seem upset he dumped you, you should have enough self respect to have dumped him properly yourself. He’s not going to treat you well OP.

You've not DTD yet and he's saying he wants a threesome?

Let's hope he's dumped you as you appear not to realise it's you that should be doing the dumping.

You offered him the opportunity to not bother with you any more or keep you dangling should he choose to

He sounds truly awful. Asking about threesomes when you'd not even had sex yet....yuk.🤮

Have some self respect and get rid of this man child for good

Talking about a threesome on your first date, how romantic! You dodged a bullet.

Bet he has a few females on the go.
It is all part of the dating game.
Finding and fitting into each other's desires and needs.
I wouldn't be analysing it myself.
It's a polite way to keep your number handy, probably.

Women who agree to threesomes involving another woman are known as unicorns because they’re so rare! He shared a fantasy, it’s a pretty common one. You’ve stated your feelings. Not sure if you’ve been dumped but maybe think about if he’s for you or if you think he might pressure you into something you don’t want to do further down the line.

I can’t believe you didn’t want a threesome on the second date!!
He sounds a charmer.

what a Prince!

I would block and move on

Sounds like he wants something casual not serious. So when he says we'll keep in touch he means he will keep you as an option in case you change your mind. I think if he wants to see you again he would've said 'when are you free or let's see each other again'.

The questions is, do you want to see him again? Because it actually sounds like you have dumped him tbf.

what a Prince amongst Men.

honestly OP why invest a moment of your energy on someone who's a slime ball. Up the ante on your self-esteem.

Rubbish took itself out.

Why would you be bothered by this man opting out? I'm wondering why you didn't dump him on the spot!

You got into the situation of discussing sexual fantasies/kinks very early on. He was honest and told you his. Understandably, this isn't for you. It doesn't make him a monster though!
If I were you, and things progress, I'd constantly be wondering if he wanted the threesome, if he was thinking about it. I'd be paranoid that I wasn't enough. So on that basis, I'd be happy to part.
As for whether you've been dumped, I don't know.

So you basically told him you aren't that into him (if you were you wouldn't have said that you were 'totally fine' if he wasn't interested), and now you think he's the one that has called time, when he's actually the one that said 'we'll keep in touch'? If anything, it sounds like you dumped him.

urgh talking about threesomes before you’ve even properly got together how tacky. Is romance dead?

you’ve had a lucky escape OP throw this one back