To think it’s rude not to wave your guests goodbye?

[Pastelbuttercream]

I was brought up to always wave guests goodbye at the door and only shut the front door once they had driven off. This was the norm when I was growing up, everyone did it. If they were not parked near your house you’d walk to their car and wave them off there.

The amount of people who do not do this anymore surprises me. I always feel it’s rude but maybe I am out of touch?

If you don’t wave your guests off, why not? (besides having to close the door incase your toddler runs out, this I completely understand!)

Am I old fashioned? Is this not a thing anymore?

My husbands best friend follows us out to the car, even when we really need to get away and have said so several times...and another half hour conversation takes place at the car! Drives me insane when I just want to go!
When I've stayed over at my best friends house an hour and a half away, she walks me out to the car, we hug and I now say, "You may as well go in, as I need to set my music up etc" and she does!
Usually when I've been visiting, I say "There's no need to see us/me out". Or if someone has visited me, I see them to the door and once they're out of the gate, I close the door!
Can't be faffing with endless waving and grinning!!! 🤣🤣🤣

I hate this. Please leave me to faff in the car for 5 minutes before starting my journey.

I fail to see why this is considered good manners, when it makes so many people uncomfortable.

I wouldn't worry, if some people don't find something about which to feel offended they worry!

When we lived abroad and came over for holidays etc, my parents would wave to us as we drove away to start our journey back and I would look in the mirror wondering if this was the last time I would see them alive and, of course, one day it was for my Dad.

My granny and grandad always did this and I found it a bit awkward, the whole extended family shuffling outside as if leaving their house was a Big Event. To be fair though, she is now 90 and has only recently been convinced to answer the phone with "hello" rather than "[Surname] residence, Mrs [Surname] speaking" 😅

Thankfully, my mum didn't inherit the waving habit. She doesn't even get off the sofa when I leave her house, we just say goodbye and I walk out. Much less faff!

Because it would make me anxious and uncomfortable for people to stand in the door watching me get my shit together in the car. I'd feel rushed and twitchy. I don't do it to my guests because I hate it being done to me.

I do wave off some of my older relatives as I know that they would be hurt if I didn't. Many of my friends seem to be very forgetfully so I tend to do a quick sweep around the house to make sure they have not forgotten anything particular those who had to travel a fair bit

I'm actually pretty upset reading all these posts. I honestly thought that my love shone through to my kids and grandkids when I do this.

Please don't be upset! MNers are notoriously grouchy and antisocial, I'm sure your family love and appreciate it.

All the people who do this - would you stop if someone asked you not to, or said it made them uncomfortable?

Because I've asked people not to do this to me and some insist on doing it anyway which seems really odd and actually quite rude.

I always wave my guests off, but I don't hang around on the doorstep unless they are older, just to make sure they get off alright.

It's really not grouchy and antisocial not to want to be stared at while you drive off

Check messages to see if any need replying to before I leave (since I've been chatting to my host and not paying attention to phone). Possibly text someone so they know when to expect me.

Possibly set up a podcast or audiobook.

Set up google maps. Possibly look at traffic/ make route choices.

Check I have a water bottle accessible, and a snack if needed. Check I have a sensible number of layers of clothing on.

Breathe. And go.

To be fair, half the time i forget one of these and have to stop anyway. But I'm way more likely to remember them if there's not someone distracting me.

In our family we throw a cup or bowl of water after someone as they leave, that is considered the most courteous way

I hate being waved off. You have said goodbye, so just go indoors. It makes you feel rushed and often, I spend a couple of minutes deciding what music to put on.

Mind you, when my close family come round, I say bye to them from the living room and they let themselves out. I don't really see close family as guests, they don't have to knock, they let themselves in and they can let themselves out.

For other guests who aren't so close I would see them to the door.

Haha me too - this reminded me of an older couple we know... whenever we go round, we get waved off at the door. Now, we wave goodbye, go around the corner, park up, and then sort out satnav and so on!

I really really want this to be true...

I must be old school. I like to see them out, maybe walk out to the car.
My adult kids, 30’s, it’s bye mum, shut the door. Sometimes, I get to walk to the door on my own and shut it.
It feels like they can’t get rid of us fast enough

Haha I thought this was an Asian thing ! We all walk our guests out and wave them off, it's pretty much the norm. I don't feel like it's rude if someone doesn't do it but it does feel like something is missing !

I also make my dc see off their friends properly in this way when they've been visiting. It's just nice isn't it.

I used to but now it takes so long for people to prepare when they get in the car. It used to be get in - seatbelts on - drive away. Now it's faffing sorting out phone connections etc (I do this too, not a criticism). Also in the small child years it takes forever to get them in and organised.

I think it might depend on who they are/how far they have travelled/what the weather is doing.

It's a thing I remember doing as a family when I was a kid.

When I visited my Dad we would have a hug at the door & he'd go back in & wave from the window.

MIL used to run down the drive & knock on the window for more attention just as we were all settled in the car & about to drive out.🙄

My mum and dad used to do that, I loved it and really miss it! I don't do it though and I wouldn't expect others to, it's just not a thing any more

My DH does this every time I leave the house. It’s really annoying. I set the sat nav, find audio book. See how long he’ll wait. I can only conclude that he wants to be sure I’ve gone,

I don't do it because I don't want guests to feel they are under pressure to go, my mam had a tiny car and I have a large concrete area for parking but she still does about a 50 point turn before getting out the drive. She'd be nervous if I stood there watching. I walk her to the car, hug/ kiss then go back in

Others have kids to settle, radio to get on, google maps etc.

My MIL stands at the door, so I get in the car and drive around the corner out of sight then set up my audio book etc before heading off.

Wow! Where do you live? I'm just interested.

I can't see the road from my front door but I usually wave from the doorstep and guests quickly disappear round the corner. I don't understand 'making sure they get away alright' if they discovered a flat tyre or the car wouldn't start I'd expect them to come back if they needed help.

I don't have any rules about it and don't remember being taught any.

Mum & Dad always come to the end of the drive to wave us off, which has been lovely.
But last time I asked Dad (94) to go back indoors so I knew he was in safely before I set off.