When did it become a thing to bring your dog to other peoples houses ?!

[Flowersandforests]

DH & I bought a house last year & have been really enjoying having friends / family over - but I’m getting soooo fed up of people asking / assuming their dog is invited too!!

I spent all of last Saturday cleaning my house & then friends bought their dog along so I had to reclean the whole house the next day to get rid of all the dog hair etc. I even found dog hair in my bed the next day 😱

We even had a friend who bought some manky sausages & asked us to cook them for the dog!!! I was trying not to gag.

I’ve started trying to say no, but find people take it soo personally if you don’t embrace their dog too. We’ve also had friends say they can’t leave the dog so would have to cancel (an hour before they were due to arrive) so I feel like my hand is being always being forced.

Has this always been a thing ??!! AIBU to think it’s rude and you should leave your pets at home.

That is very strange!

I don't mind dogs but I wouldn't have one in my house even if I didn't have 4 cats of varying temperaments.

Just say no, they can then decide what to do.

YANBU, they KNOW you don’t like dogs so shouldn’t even ask you!

I like dogs a lot but I still don’t allow them or their hair into my home.

When you invite someone with dogs, pre-empt them that by reminding them that it’s humans only.

They should decline if they want but they should not act pissy about it and definitely should not turn up with the dog despite your wishes.

Mn must have an “ ist” term for this attitude! Maybe breedist? 😂

@Calliopespa it wouldn't matter what breed she was tbh, I'm not a dog person but have grown to tolerate love her as she's my sisters!

YANBU but I can’t say this has ever happened to
me. I also wouldn’t take my dog to someone else’s house or out for brunch or to John Lewis. Dogs like to do dog things.
As a dog owner, I don’t really want someone else’s dog at my house if I’m honest. I know I groom and bathe mine regularly; he’s very small and a non shedding breed. Unless someone has similar, I’d rather not have their dog over.

Can’t you say yes dog can come but will need to stay in the garden.

My relatives will only come over if they can bring the dog. If I say no I don’t want the dog they get upset that I’m keeping them from seeing my toddler. Sick of it.

I feel like this is a post pandemic thing. People seem to think their dogs are equal to human children these days. I have friends that go everywhere with their dogs and cancel plans if they cannot bring them - they were never like that before covid, but they do ask first though.

I hate it! I have dogs so people assume it’s fine. Have had dogs piss up my sofa, run around in rooms mind aren’t allowed to go, be (owner decided) ‘anxious’ so kind had to go out, have NEVER seen them pick up a poo. Pet peeve.
Meanwhile I have never taken mind to anyone else’s house. If I did I think they’d be horrified.

I'd say no if anyone turned up either a dog.

They won't do it again.

I have had the ‘my dog is nervous, can you put yours out? ‘ also had that crap when one decided to try to hump my old boy.

Err, no. If the guest can’t behave, the guest leaves/ goes in the garden in the perpetual rain/ stays in the car.

Nervous small child - absolutely, my two will be in another room. Before I get jumped on.

This is honestly such an entitled view ! So people without dogs have to put up having them in their house or risk their friends not wanting to be friends anymore ?! Really??

Any if you want to be friends with Fungipie

YANBU at all. Some of my family can be like this and I agree that even asking is wrong when they know what the answer will be as it makes me uncomfortable. It's like they hope if they ask enough times you'll give in, that's not nice behaviour from friends or family.
We also get messages sent en route 'btw I know you said dog couldn't come but (insert random bollocks excuse) dog sitter is ill/teen neighbour has an exam/dog isn't feeling well'. It makes saying no so horribly uncomfortable. I insist dog stays in the garden in this situation.

@TruJay did they not even offer to clean up the mess? They sat looking at the paw prints and did nothing?! I would've been gobsmacked if a guest turned up with 2 dogs to see my 3 day old baby and quite probably started crying.

Dogs are generally a lot more smelly and intrusive. They’re often also larger, and tend to tread mud in everywhere and lick things. Cats don’t smell, unless people have litter trays which can smell sometimes. They are much cleaner than dogs, though both can leave hair everywhere. And they are more likely to keep to themselves and are smaller.

Dogs also need a lot more looking after - walking, grooming etc. And you don’t need to take your cat around with you, or see if it can come into peoples houses.

And some people will be allergic to dogs and others to cats so that evens out. I’m a bit allergic to cats but would still happily live with one but could never live with a dog. Obv I’m a cat person and I know there are other huge pluses for dogs if you like them.

Nothing entitled- just the reality for many dog owner/lovers that they may choose their dog. For many, their dog brings them happiness day in, day out- unlike friends.

Due to her history, our dog can be left for a few hours, but not more. So if friends invite me for the day, I can't go, and won't go. Could still be friends- but honestly, I will tell you the absolute truth- I don't really trust people who don't like dogs. In fact, none of my friends don't like dogs, come to think of it. Never thought about this before.

A true allergy is another thing. Most people just use an allergy as an excuse, tbh.

BTW my dog is very well behaved, does not jump, does not attempt to go on settee, and if I visit, she will have her own clean blanket, washed the previous day, and I will always have a clean towel to clean her paws. She is never imposed on anyone- but I am likely to turn down invites where she is not welcome. I have great friends where she is always welcome.

I do not allow dogs in the house.

I’ve noticed that this is a thing now. Perhaps since lockdown. It’s infuriating. My father in law made a big song and dance about how his dog is ‘part of the family’ (obviously over and above our cat and toddler who is scared of this dog). We have friends who do the same. FML

Start saying sorry we can't have the dog here shall we come to you instead? They might manage to leave the dog at home if it means they don't have to host!

Surely you just need to arrange care for your dog. Not assume your friends love it too. I can assure you some of them are just being polite!

Weird. I’ve only had a dog over when I specifically said it was fine and said dog just sat in his basket (which came along too) all evening .

MIL has a medical assistance dog , I’m severely allergic to dogs (and cats). She repeatedly tries to come round with the dog and I have to refuse to let her in and every time it causes an argument so now dh just goes there to see her and has to change and shower the second he comes home or i have an asthma attack. She tried to tell me once I was ‘breaking Some kind of law’ by not allowing her in and told me that even if a stranger knocked on the door it’s the law to allow them to use the toilet so if she asks me that I have to let her and the dog in???? She’s crazy