Should petrol money and accommodation be charged?

[PinkStarAtNight]

I am looking for opinions on whether a person should be charged petrol money and accommodation fees or not.

So the situation is, person A and person B agreed to go on holiday with each other and booked a holiday together last year. They paid half for the holiday itself and, because it involves person A driving them there, they of course agreed they would split the petrol money.

Months later, person C, who is a close family member of person A, is going through a tough time and was invited to tag along on the holiday as they live alone and are struggling.

There is now a debate as to whether person C should pay a third of the petrol money and a third of the accommodation costs.

Accommodation has already been paid in full between person A and B, so paying for accommodation would involve person C handing over cash to person A and B to make it so they have essentially all paid a third each. And petrol money would be split three ways on the days of travel.

So...
Should person C pay an equal share of accommodation and petrol?

Or should they not have to pay, because person A and B planned this trip a while ago and would be paying half regardless of whether person C attends or not.

Person C will not be increasing costs in any way as the accommodation has always been big enough for three people, as person A and B booked a large caravan. Person C has agreed that they will not be dictating what happens on the holiday or factored into any decisions or plans for the activities, as they are only going because they don't want to be alone right now.

Also, does it make a difference that person C is close family member of one of the original people?

And to the person who mentioned person C's 'demands' - what demands exactly? No demands have been made. Person C just said that they don't feel they can be alone in a house during the night. Person A is usually there. Person A decided to ask person B if C could come along. B said yes. That's it. What demands have been made?

It's quite manipulative to say to another adult that they can't be without you for a week.

It's emotionally manipulative though. Telling your live-in spouse/sibling/parent that you can't bare to be alone overnight when they have a holiday planned means they only have three choices:

1. Cancel
2. Invite you along
3. Go anyway without you in the knowledge that your can't simply bare to be alone

So B was demanding, just without saying "you must welcome me on your holiday". They've acted badly, and so has A by going along with it.

B really shouldn't be paying more than a third, but if I were B I reckon I'd be leaving A and C to it.

Yes C was basically saying I need to come or you cannot go to A.

B should not have to share a bathroom . A caravan for 4 with one bathroom is more inconvenient for B .

If I was B I wouldn’t pay the share of c’s holiday - they aren’t even friends .

yes it does sound like C has hinted she wants to go , maybe B felt obligated to say yes .

Who is C? It makes a big difference eg daughter, husband, mother, etc.
I feel sorry for B. What option but to accept the extra person do they really have?
Please make sure B at least gets the best room.

Agreed. And B was offered the double bed. However, recently another problem has now arisen over bedding...

There was an option to pay an extra £40 to have all the beds made up on arrival. £40 per caravan not per person. Caravan is made for 4 people so all costs are based on this. £10 per person so £40.

Person A wanted to pay the £40 to get the bedding but person B didn't as didn't see point of extra cost, especially because there wouldn't be 4 people actually going so felt that £40 was too much. So, person A called the holiday company to explain that although the holiday is designed for 4 people, there was only three going so would it be an option to just pay £30 for three people? They said yes, but if there is only three people they won't make up the double bed.

Person A couldn't then backtrack and ask them to make up the double bed because they had already told them there would only be three people and the holiday company said this is how it works...person A is annoyed with person B because person A would have been happy just to split the £40 but person B was quibbling over this and now the double bed will not be made up. So all three of person A B and C are paying £10 each for bedding but if person B is to have the double, they would have to take their own bedding.

Now you're all quibbling over £13 each?

No. Not all. Just person B. Person B likes to save money wherever possible.

I think the relationship between them and ages are relevant here.

So what beds have been made up?

Well person C should have offered to pay the £40, and then they would have been square for the accommodation.
Person C should make a contribution to the travel, because even if they are teeny tiny the extra weight will cost more on fuel and wear and tear on the car.

Person A couldn't then backtrack and ask them to make up the double bed because they had already told them there would only be three people and the holiday company said this is how it works...

Surely Person A just needs to tell the holiday company that the party size is now 3 and you will pay an extra tenner, please could they make up the double bed?

Why do you feel that’s backtracking?

If A and C know that about B then it can't be a surprise that B wants C to pay a third of the costs of the holiday.

The costs are thirded and A and C pay £15 each for the bedding.

I think you’re getting a hard time. Perfectly reasonable to suggest inviting C.

I wouldn't pay a tenner to have someone make a bed for, assuming full mobility. What a waste.

The holiday sounds cheap enough that it doesn't matter but as b if she wants c to pay. Then ask c what she wants to pay/do financially

C should pay in my opinion.

I think Person C is the only one who thinks C shouldn't pay, and it's all going to be horribly awkward and both A and B will wish they hadn't invited her.

Btw.... "Person C has agreed that they will not be dictating what happens on the holiday or factored into any decisions or plans for the activities" is simply not feasible. I would call that emotional blackmail, and I'd run a mile if I ever saw C coming again.

Cough up, C, and ditch all this bollocks about how you don't have to pay because you won't be making the decisions. What are you, 12?

I'm feeling sorry (slightly) for B- they knew it was an inevitability that C would have to come, because C doesn't want to be on their own- so basically that's not really a choice a B, is it. It's emotional blackmail from C, which A is happy to allow, and B basically gets no real choice without sounding like a heartless bitch. B didn't want to lay for linen, so I assume they were always planning to take their own linen, so surely then it doesn't matter if the main bed isn't made up, because they were never going to pay. So their option is the double with their own bedding, or a single and pay their share of £10? I'll stick with, C is an emotional manipulator, A, is happy to be manipulated, B is being a tight arse over the linen, and c should be paying because they interjected themselves on a holiday they were never invited to, and probably planned on all along..........and that A & B should probably not plan anything similar again........

"No. Not all. Just person B. Person B likes to save money wherever possible."

So why on earth is there any question about C paying their fair share? B is going to be royally pissed off if she doesn't.

Well got to find a way to make b look unreasonable?...

Why not ask person C to pay the £40 linen fee and the £40 fuel cost, which would mean they’ve paid almost as much as what persons A & B have paid for the caravan.

I must say, it's making me feel very cheerful about my dull plans for the weekend. Imagine being stuck in a caravan with A, B and C arguing over every teabag.

if I was person B and a third person was invited along (assuming not asked first and able to say no), I'd probably be telling person A what to do with a third of a caravan.

Agree …quite glad I am working this weekend!

Christ on a bike, this all sounds like a bloody miserable holiday. Emotional blackmail, squabbling over bed linen, and not even any wine/crisps/ chocolate to dull the pain.

Agreed this grim.

Better a wet weekend at home than an atmosphere in a caravan and no booze or nice food to liven things up.