To want a female only dorm in a bunkhouse?

[Firefightress1]

Im doing a long walk next month in the highlands of scotland. Accomodation is limited to hostels and bunkhouses in some locations. Apparently they are no longer able to ask your gender so all rooms in the bunkhouse I am staying are unisex.

I've asked to be put in with another female and been told the other bunk is booked but because of gdpr they can't tell me if I am sharing with a male or female.

Is this not completely bonkers? Am I being unreasonable to want to know who is going to be in the same room as me while im sleeping or is this just normal and the risk you take?

I'm perplexed and a bit stressed about it.

I would see it as an issue if it was compulsory to stay there, so if it was a work trip or a mixed sex hospital ward/ prison etc. I don’t see it as an issue when staying in the accommodation is completely optional and when there are other options available locally. It’s unfortunate for the OP that the other local option suggest by many on here is fully booked and that she can’t afford the hotel but that is an issue with her pre-planning and budgeting for a £1k trip without considering the accommodation options. Personally I wouldn’t want to share a bunkhouse with a stranger of either sex and so this kind of accommodation would be restricting for me, I have autism and would hate to share with a stranger, but I wouldn’t expect the bunkhouse to offer single rooms and start a thread complaining there’s no option for a single room and that this is disability discrimination, I’d just accept it’s not suitable accommodation for me and go elsewhere.

It's a crazy policy. Expecting two strangers of the opposite sex to be happy to share a twin room? No. They should definitely be prepared to tell you the sex of the other person (based on their best guess from the booking).
I've stayed in plenty of mixed dorms but the smallest was about 8 people. Safety in numbers. This isn't reasonable or sensible. I would feel very uncomfortable.

No. Thats just bullshit. They probably don't want to lose the booking from the other person if OP makes a fuss.

I wouldn't want to sleep in the same room as a strange man either, but I recognise the world doesn't revolve around me and thd bunkhouse is free to run its business as it chooses and I'd seek an alternative.

Never stayed in a bunkhouse or bothy with separate 'dorms'. It's just one (freezing) room with bunks.

Id be seeking an alternative on price alone regardless of the gender issue. Even if it meant re routing my trip.

I'd expect a bit of Lorne sausage and haggis thrown in for that!

This bunkhouse also has rooms of 4 or 6, presumably they’re just fully booked. The only option is not a mixed sex two bed bunk room, it’s just the only option left because the OP has obviously left sorting accommodation until quite last minute.

Do you genuinely not see why the owner disclosing the other occupant of a two bed bunkhouse's sex to any random person enquiring could be an issue?

Men are a risk to women - to deny that is ludicrous. Saying that men are a risk to women is NOT remotely suggesting that "all men are sex attackers". We just don't know which ones AREN'T - do we?

Moreover, women should have the right to PRIVACY from strange men - surely you see that? YOU might not want it - but an awful lot of women DO.

I completely agree women should have the right to privacy, but there would have been other accommodation options available that didn’t involve staying in a mixed sex 2 bed bunkhouse if the OP had either booked further in advance or budgeted for the hotel. Women don’t have the right to try and book a mixed sex dorm (for a totally optional trip!) and then get upset that it’s not single sex, when it’s her own poor planning that means there is no other option.

It’s a £1k trip, OP is hardly in dire straights she could have budgeted for a hotel stay. There are single pods down the road, OP could have booked these earlier but now they are fully booked. There is an option to book out both bunks and have a room to yourself, but again OP has left planning too late and this isn’t an option. OP could have booked into a larger 4/6 bed room with safety in numbers, but again has booked at the last minute so this isn’t an option. Ultimately the issue is that OP has left booking accommodation until too late and there is only one bed available in her budget and location and this is a single bed in a mixed sex 2 bed room. The issue here is failure to plan adequately, not an issue with the existence of mixed sex facilities. What are the bunkhouse supposed to do if the other person who has booked is a man? Kick him out even though he made his booking first because the OP thinks she’s entitled to a single sex room and hold the room for a woman only, potentially losing money if no woman books in?

Odd to have a room just for two really in a bunkroom/hut situation, we do a lot of hiking here in nz and everyone sleeps together in the huts, it is how it is but they tend to be big bunk rooms. Hostels are different.

Firefightress1 · Yesterday 18:58
MrsSkylerWhite · Yesterday 18:49

Unfortunately not, it's literally the middle of nowhere.”

(completely missing point ….. ) It’s not Luibeilt, is it? 👻

I dont understand what you mean.

Sorry, when I read your description of the location I immediately thought of an infamous allegedly haunted bothy/bunkhouse featured on the Uncanny podcast, in the highlands “literally in the middle of nowhere”.

If it was, was going to say don’t go there! 😄

Thanks everyone for the input, I'm taking my tent as a back up but will try the bunkhouse first.

If it was a large dorm I wouldn't be quite as fussed bit it's quite intimate when it's 2 people.

Will see how it goes.

I've done many a walking holiday and never once seen male/female only dorms. This isn't woke madness. It's just simply the way things have long been done. Many walkers travel as a couple or in mixed groups and want to be together. That said, I'd never stay somewhere with two bed rooms as that's just a bit odd no matter who you're sharing with.

I'm a long distance hiker and in Europe and Scandinavia it's always mixed. In most huts in the alps you have "Matratzenlager" which is a huge mattress which everyone sleeps on, mixed sex.
In all the years I have never had a problem with anyone in the rooms at night (I was once sexually harrassed by a waiter in one of the huts but that is another story). Most people are far too knackered and fall asleep the second they get in there.
I totally get that you find it uncomfortable, especially as you've never experienced it before. One thing I have always done, even though I've never experienced any issues, is to keep my emergency whistle under my pillow which I could then blow if someone did start to behave in an inappropriate manner.

Voice of reason 🙌

You can't "reroute your trip" if you're walking The West Highland Way, and this section has very limited accommodation. That's why even basic bunkhouse beds are so expensive.

Why not ask to be moved to one of the larger rooms if a space becomes available? Or maybe even swap when you get there. Most people staying are likely to be walking the WHW (or part of it) so you may see them at previous accommodations.

Every person is potentially a risk to another person but I’m not living my life in fear of a potential very-low chance of assault.

Women (and men) have the “right” to select accommodation which best fits their need and budget. I personally don’t want to share with anyone, so I don’t. Not because they might murder me in my bed, but because they might snore and fart all night in theirs.

Thank god previous posters from hiking communities have offered a balanced and sensible view of their experiences. Imagine what the Matratzenlager visitors would think of some of these comments! The hysteria would be absolutely bewildering to them.

I’ve had single sex hiking accommodation in Europe.

Each sex was assigned their own barn.

I've been thinking about this and I know the OP probably left it late to book, so her options are limited, etc. But. It's natural to feel vulnerable when we sleep somewhere new. The number one top requirement of a place where you're going to be sleeping is that you feel safe. So clean sheets and a cockroach-free bed are also vitally important but I'd rather have dirty sheets and feel safe than a fruit basket and free mini bar but not feel comfortable about falling asleep. They ABU imo - they should tell you the sex of the other person.

I didnt leave it that late, I actually booked over 6 months ago, I was told at the time the room was already allocated but to contact them again nearer the time and they would see if I could purchase the other bunk.

There is only 2 options in this area, the other one was already full when I booked or I would definitely have chosen it.

I've accepted my decision, its not my first hike, I've actually walked this path 3 times previously and many others across Scotland staying in single sex dorms and bigger rooms.

Thanks for everyone's opinions.im hoping it's a nice room mate whatever their gender 😊

Sorry I'm not sure what you want the outcome to be here. Even if they were strict about single sex, a man may have already booked one of the two bunks meaning you wouldn't even have the option to stay, they'd be waiting for another male customer to fill the other bunk.

Yeah it's fine, I would have preferred a room to myself but I have the tent as a back up 😀

Go on to Hostelworld. They have female only dorms in properties all over Scotland.