To want a female only dorm in a bunkhouse?

[Firefightress1]

Im doing a long walk next month in the highlands of scotland. Accomodation is limited to hostels and bunkhouses in some locations. Apparently they are no longer able to ask your gender so all rooms in the bunkhouse I am staying are unisex.

I've asked to be put in with another female and been told the other bunk is booked but because of gdpr they can't tell me if I am sharing with a male or female.

Is this not completely bonkers? Am I being unreasonable to want to know who is going to be in the same room as me while im sleeping or is this just normal and the risk you take?

I'm perplexed and a bit stressed about it.

I've just been doing some internet searching, and from what I can tell, some bunkhouses advertise as mixed sex only, although some have private rooms and family rooms. Some say they have mixed sex plus single sex rooms, some advertise as being entirely single sex.

So I don't think it's ridiculous to think there might be single sex accommodation available on this type of holiday, although it might be harder to find.

I'm not sure to be honest, it's a bit intimate in a room for 2 with a stranger. It says in their website they endeavour to put same sex together but if they cant even ask the question how will they know? I'm not saying I'll be sharing with a pervert but who knows?

Yeah, I'd rather be in a large mixed sex dorm room than in a 2 person room with a opposite sex stranger. Hopefully the staff try to ensure it is a woman, even if they're not allowed to say/ ask!

This is literally the only accomodation available within 20 miles of walking. They have a hotel but its 300pounds a night! The bunkhouse is 54 quid so affordable for me. I dont have any other choice unfortunately

If there’s literally no other choice then it doesn’t sound like it matters whether they can or can’t disclose the sex/ gender of your dorm mate? Even if they could tell you it sounds like if it was a man you’d still have to stay there, so just go into it assuming it will be a man and if it’s a woman that’s a nice bonus.

I think mixed sex is normal for bunkhouses and has been for a long time. However they surely can tell you the sex of the other person - you will find out when you get there anyway. I am sure that is nothing to do with gdpr

Same sex or same gender? Because same gender could mean anything.

"Youth hostels are different from bunk houses and do offer single sex dorms, so maybe look at them instead?"

Wrong. The YHA policy is "Transgender guests are welcome to stay in the dormitory which corresponds with the gender with which they identify."

I'd challenge them on the GDPR pushback, it gets trotted out all the time as a way of not providing any information. By disclosing the probable (based on name) sex of your bunk mate they are not revealing information that would allow you to identify that person - it just narrows it down to 50% of the entire population 🙄. It, however would give you information by which you can take a decision in your best interests. Totally bonkers, I'd be uncomfortable too and would probably camp!

I expect in reality they probably do assume that Laura and Charlotte are both female and David and Nick are both male and bunk them in together. And 98% of the time they’ll be correct. But considering plenty of transpeople change their names to ones associated with the sex they want to identify as (and there are legitimately ambiguous names like Charlie, Jamie, Leigh, Kerry, Taylor, Shannon etc) they can’t actually guarantee that’s the case and tell you which sex the other person is.

Perhaps you could email them and ask for their safeguarding policy?

You have the option not to go. If that is your decision, make sure the local MSP knows, especially if it is Kate Forbes who probably agrees with you.

So presumably no Islamic women ever visit that part of Scotland? For whom sharing with a man even if say a 12 bed dorm would not be acceptable.

That's a possible issue, but the odds on one random person in a bunkhouse being a trans woman and having said they're female aren't huge.

I have, but it's quite clear it's unisex with the back up of they will try to assign based on gender although I've no idea how they can possibly do that?

That's mad, I've travelled all over the world and you would normally get to pick Male, female or mixed dorms.

I preferred female only but a mixed dorm isn't too bad. I would get dressed into full PJ's in the shower rooms anyway.

My friend had a trans woman in her bunk before! Not the same bunkhouse bit it's more common now than you think!

Welcome to Scotland. Our government is fully behind this lunacy, gender self-recognition, men sharing bunk rooms with women. They don't care about how women feel about this state of affairs.

If they’ve got lots of rooms it might be they wait until the person arrives and visually assess sex/ gender. So when Man 1 turns up they put him in room 1, next person to arrive is female so goes in room 2, then another woman so they put her in room 2 as well etc. But they obviously cannot guarantee sex/ gender because if they have 8 beds and 5 men and 3 women then a man and woman will need to share.

If it clearly states it’s unisex then really you need to accept you might be sharing with a man. If that’s not something you’re willing to accept then you need to find another option.

I agree with this. Don't get me wrong, I'm as gender critical as the next person, but it doesn't really sound as if trans is the issue in this case, more data protection.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that trans people choosing a single sex space that confirms with their identity, but not with how that appear to others and making others uncomfortable is an issue. But if we respond to that problem by doing away with single sex spaces altogether, we actually create a much bigger problem, as it's an issue everywhere, all the time, not just when there happens to be a trans person who doesn't respect the way others may feel about them around.

I know, I live on Skye but frequently travel for hiking and munros. First time I've had this issue! I'll be writing to Kate forbes x

It sounds like you don’t have a choice. Leaving trans issues aside here it seems crazy that they can’t ask if you are male or female. They don’t need to tell anyone else, just that bunk room a is mixed sex if it’s already booked by someone the opposite sex to you. If it were booked by someone the same sex they could tell you it was a same sex bunk.

It doesn’t sound like this is anything to do with gender self-recognition. The issue isn’t that this is a bunkhouse advertising single sex dorms which will let a trans person in the dorm which matches their ‘gender’ rather than their sex. These dorms are advertised as unisex, meaning a man and woman might be put together, nothing to do with whether either is trans. The issue here is surely with the business model of offering unisex rooms, I don’t see how the trans issue is really relevant because it doesn’t sound like men/ women will only be placed together if one self-identifies as a ‘gender’ different to their sex. Any man and any woman may be placed together because all of the rooms are unisex/ mixed as standard and single sex rooms aren’t being offered.

Take your business elsewhere.

I'd cancel on a point of principle.