Is 2.5hrs+ of travel excessive expectation?

[ChildcareQ]

GPs live ~40 mins away.

They occasionally help out with odd day here and there of school holiday childcare.

Usually travelling to the family home and looking after children in their own home (so approx 80 mins travelling).

One parent WFH and has expressed this situation does not work for them. It's too disruptive. They want GP to look after children in their home. This was raised day before childcare had been arranged for, no time to rearrange/make alternative arrangements.

At short notice other parent arranged to drop DC off at GP house in the morning before work. Not ideal as GP house is 40 mins in wrong direction for work. Will make parent "late" for work (not an issue, parent works flexi). GPs will bring children home at the end of the day.

WFH parent is now incredulous and thinks this is unreasonable. GPs should pick up children and drop them back - so over 2.5hrs of travelling.

Other GP with a similar arrangement will drop and collect, but they live 20 mins away. Is WFH parent unreasonable to expect the same of other GP who live further away?

Before anyone says it, other parent is now planning to use holiday clubs in future for the odd days that GPs would usually help out. Not worth the hassle (although children will miss out on GP time and be sad as they would prefer to be looked after by GP).

Other parent does not think WFH parent is being unreasonable to find WFH with children and GP in home difficult. However expecting GPs to provide childcare, plus travelling 2.5hrs seems unreasonable.

Not sure who you are in this scenario so cannot answer if YABU.

WFH parent sounds like a selfish individual at best.

WFH parent needs to find somewhere else to work, or put up with childcare happening at home while they are working. That amount of totally unnecessary travel is ridiculous.

WFH parent is super unreasonable.

What a lot of extra travelling for one days DC minding.

wouldn't it be cheaper to put them in holiday club ? They can be collected by whichever parent is free then in the afternoon too

WFH home parent is a selfish arse, also why can’t they sort some of the childcare out?

Not cheaper (approx £80 per day for both to attend holiday club) but as mentioned will be doing this in future as not worth the hassle.

Also I think WFH parent should foot 100% of the new childcare bill as they are the ones with the issue with the current arrangement. Of course the GPS should not travel 2.5 hours plus childcare.

WFH parent is an entitled, selfish prick.

i find it CRAZY that they want to care for the children anywhere other than your home (which has all the crap they need and the GP can leave the mess and carnage there AND they dont have to pay for food / can eat all your nice food 😉)

If they insist on doing it at their own home it means someone is doing a lot of driving and giving how demanding my children and job are it wouldnt be me.

If the GP wont drive and wont look after the child in your home then id want a different arrangement.

Tldr: GPs should do it at yours if they wont then pay for childcare.

Agreed.

Your husband is being a dick

WFH parent pays for holiday clubs- they are changing the arrangement. Grandparents are kind enough to provide childcare, and the WFH parent is being selfish.

I think you may have misunderstood, apologies if not clear. GP happy to come here, and have done previously. WFH parent objects to this.

It’s not the grandparents that have the issue with coming to their home, it’s the WFH parent who doesn’t want them there!

OP I wouldn’t be rearranging anything. If the wfh parent wants to (try to) make alternative arrangements then let them crack on. Otherwise carry on as planned.

Also: the WFH parent raising this the day before should have been told that it was too late to change it!! They should have been told they could put up with it or go elsewhere to work as they were raising it at such short notice. You need better boundaries OP.

WFH parent needs to make sure desk is not in main area of house and buy some noise canceling headphones or be the person driving the children around.

WFH parent thinks the world should revolve around them (him?)

GPs should just be able to come to the house to watch the kids, if this causes difficulty for WFH parent then they should find somewhere else to work, they could even go to GPs to work for the day while GPs come to watch the kids, straight swap and everyone is happy.

WFH parent should remember they chose to have children and not expect GPs to go running about as (no doubt) unpaid childcare.

They've had their child rearing days. Now, it's an opportunity to have a cuddle and hand back to the DPs.

WFH is entitled, assuming and selfish. Remind them, that's why there are such things as nurseries and childminders.

Pay for childcare rather than expect your parents to do it for free, then you can dictate what you want.

Wfh parent needs to go into the/an office for that day. Problem solved.

I think possibly the WFH parent is getting unfairly ripped to shreds here.

I'm getting undertones of the GP's WANTING to provide the care, maybe pushing for this - and WFH parent being at the end of their tether and putting their foot down that it's not suitable to take place at home (absolutely fair enough). Then possibly some type of argument where WFH parent has suggested holiday club, met resistance and insistance that GP's do it and said fine, if it's such a big deal that GP's do this then they need to collect and drop off.

If I'm at all close, WFH parent is nbu. If not, ignore, they're probably an arsehole!

WFH parent needs to find somewhere else to work.
Its a home first, workplace second.

I think that wfh parent might be reasonable to say that working with DC being at home is tricky. I disagree that wfh parent should pay for the club, sometimes wfh when kids are there is practically impossible. However the arrangement with GPs picking up and bringing DC back is quite complicated. Too much driving for DC and GPs in one day.
By the way changing the arrangement at the very last minute (unless it was an emergency) was wrong.