To be so annoyed he ate all the Penguins

[Popadomorbread]

I am livid.
We have a tin of chocolate biscuits in the cupboard. It was full of Penguins, some of which were the cheaper Aldi ‘Seal’ alternative, okay but not has good. DH has eaten all the penguins and left me with only the sub par Seal bars. Absolute prick, I’m thinking LTB.

Perhaps he was feeling a little P...P...P...Peckish?

Actually, if you're under 40 you probably won't get that reference 🐧🐧🐧

Ltb 😂

Pi-pi-pi- ck up divorce papers. 😉

Definitely old enough to get the reference!
Less Peckish and more P..P..P..Plonker!!

P-p-p-pick up a spade

Penguins are the dog’s bollocks.

He owes you some bollocks.

Time to get the scissors out…

I bought the Seal bars, among other, individually wrapped biscuits, for some tradesmen working in my house. They left them all. I think that tells you everything.
LTB

Agree. LTB.

Back in lockdown my DH ate all my Jaffa Cakes one day. He doesn't even like Jaffa Cakes. It was the queueing up 30 minutes to get in a shop height of lockdown. He is very, very lucky to have survived that.

Whenever I buy a multipack of something I'm particular to, I hide 1 or 2 in the weetabix box, otherwise the plague of locusts I live with will descend and take them all. I comfort myself with the fact that they're welcome to find and eat them....they've just got to start choosing a high fibre breakfast first!

I went specially into town last week to buy a half price Hotel Chocolat Easter Egg, went out for the evening at the weekend, husband ate half of it.

I’m contemplating our future together tbh.

I’d think you’d be looked favourably upon in the courts if you took evasive action OP.

Although tbf I think technically the sliding scale should be:

Kit Kat- Burn his dinner
Club- He sleeps in the spare room
Penguin- he sleeps in the shed
Mars Bar - divorce papers.

My condolences, I assume you'll be planning the funeral through next week?

I suspect David Attenborough is as upset as you are.

Tell him they are just bourbons with chocolate on. He'll never eat them again! Haha

I thought this was going to be about a very hungry killer whale on a new Attenborough documentary The Demise of the Penguins 🐧🐳

I think I’ll just go for the direct cremation route and use the money I’ve saved for more chocolate 😄

P-p-p-p-pick up the divorce papers!

I can sympathise. I bought a fancy Easter egg on Sunday (only £3 reduced from £12!). He ate the egg, some of the little chocolates that come with it, and threw the rest of the chocolates away because it wasn't good for him. His excuse?

"You didn't tell me not to eat it."

You ever seen orcas playing around with penguins and seals before they eat them? Pretending they've let them get away only to suddenly flip them into the air out of nowhere to their mate who bats them into oblivion?
Maybe this is your strategy? Got a mate with a tennis racket?

Ah but this argument leaves you with many loopholes for future use..."well you didn't say NOT to book myself a girly weekend away? Byeeee" 😂

Controversially, I prefer the seal bars to penguins!

I imagine the dresscode is less formal🥁

Bourbon with a chocolate coat

Definitely LTB. You don't want to be done for GBH, do you?

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Am HORRIFIED