To decline weighing

[diiidum]

I’ve just had my booking appt for my first pregnancy and I declined to be weighed and measured height wise. I am a healthy weight and size 10 and have an active lifestyle but don’t believe BMI is particularly useful. My sister was weighed and developed a bit of an obsession with the number on the scale and still has it to this day.

I came to this conclusion after research. Sara Wickham did a post about it recently on instagram, saying even if you had a ‘high BMI’ risk doesn’t usually change. At my appointment they were remarking on how low risk I was until that point but they said they will have to ask the consultant if they are happy for me not to be weighed, otherwise I’ll be high risk and might not get to birth where I would like.

WIBU here? If it’s a big deal I can always get weighed at the next appointment, that’s what I thought to myself. In the end they asked me to let them know what I was when I last weighed myself and then said I looked about that now, but they will note all that down and that I declined being weighed today.

I don’t want to be misinformed so doing lots of research on everything relating to pregnancy really, and reading all the books and internet sources I can.

Was I wrong to decline? Is there benefit to them working out BMI?

I think this is all very dramatic..

I'd just get weighed.

Can also help if you need an emergency GA with how much they give you etc.

They did their own estimate anyway and said based on what I last was they don’t think it’s changed.

YBU.

Why are you making it potentially harder for the medical professionals to give you, and your baby, the best care?

Oh Lord what a fuss. It's not all about you, it's about the safety of your baby too. You have months left of being pregnant/ giving birth/ postpartum/ new born baby. Now you have made it potentially difficult about your choice of hospital / being labelled a 'high risk birth' ...pick you battles

If you genuinely felt it would be a negative thing for your mental health, fair enough

Otherwise, it's a drama for no reason and I find it a bit odd tbh. The staff aren't there to judge you, they're literally collecting medical data relevant to your pregnancy with the aim of keeping you and your baby safe and healthy.

I think BMI is outdated personally, not that mine would be high, but I don’t want to become like my sister did.

I'm a midwife. In my hospital we only weigh at booking. Not in UK so could be different. But it's to 1 see if you are high risk for different pregnancy associated conditions but also just to dose your medications if needed.

I don't think it's a big deal tbh. If they weigh at every apt, maybe then decline along the way but they can only benefit from having your booking weight.

It is. But you’re pregnant so tracking it is important. Are you particularly muscular? Because if most of your weight is body fat it’s more useful.

If you’re genuinely visibly ‘a healthy weight’ then I’d be surprised if anyone is going to be concerned about place of birth without a BMI on record but it is needed for the score to see if you’re at risk of thromboembolism, it’s needed for the combined screening test (the actual value on the day, not just a BMI calc).

so yanbu for not wanting to ascribe too much value to BMI (Sara Wickham is very good at explaining all this I agree) but it’s not just that which it’s useful for. And if you have no issue with being weighed for a specific clinical person then YANBU to that too.

If you think you might be at risk from an eating disorder perhaps mention that. If you have issues around weight and eating it’s important they know. They could help seek support from a perinatal MH midwife.

For most other women, weighing in pregnancy is not a negative thing.

I don’t think you’re overreacting given that you’ve seen someone close develop MH issues around weight. That must’ve been difficult to watch.

Is BMI being questioned by reputable people now?

It's up to you.

Big fuss over nothing.

I know a few women who have taken this approach in pregnancy, agonising over every little thing and ‘doing their own research’. They’ve ended up muddling their maternity care and blaming medical staff for the direct consequences of decisions they have taken for themselves!

Big fuss over nothing.

I know a few women who have taken this approach in pregnancy, agonising over every little thing and ‘doing their own research’. They’ve ended up muddling their maternity care and blaming medical staff for the direct consequences of decisions they have taken for themselves!

I think they just said that at first to try and sway me because after that they said, how much were you before? Yeah you look about that now - you’re a healthy weight but BMI is useful because xyz

Why are you desperate to not be weighed? You need to, for the good of your own health when you're pregnant.

You’re entitled to make informed decisions about your own pregnancy.

Unless you have issues around your weight that knowing a number will significantly impact then let your trained and qualified health professionals take the tests/measurements they require and stop being "that patient". It doesnt matter what you think about bmi, this isnt about a diet class, it is about monitoring progress through your pg, you can ignore the number if you want too.

You will have set off all sorts of red flags for your wellbeing that are not necessary and just wastes their time.

Healthcare professional here. Your weight at booking isn’t just about BMI, it is used to calculate doses of some drugs that may be given later in pregnancy, in order to adjust for the physiological changes in pregnancy and the weight of the baby, amniotic fluid etc. Unless you really have a massive issue with it I would say having one accurate weight recorded at booking is a good idea.

You do not have to take on your sisters mental health issues around weighing.
Let the medics help you, if that means letting them Calc the BMI then so be it.
Yes BMI is a bit rubbish but seriously what else have they to go on?
It's just an objective data point for them to act on.
I'd say channel Elsa and 'let it go'

It’s relevant if you want the screening for Down’s syndrome and other chromosome anomalies just in case you weren’t aware.

Can you not just be weighed but ask the midwife to not tell you the number on the scale or your BMI? It's about the safety of your baby and the pregnancy, not you.

I wasn’t aware of this! I might send them a message and get weighed in that case. I wasn’t trying to be that patient I just really didn’t think it was necessary and didn’t want to take any risk towards being anxious over it like my sister was. Thanks all.

I’d be wary of getting into a combative relationship with the team supporting you for no reason. I get there’s a lot out there on knowing your rights and advocating for yourself and that’s great, but asking questions of the people caring for you about why they are asking or recommending something BEFORE getting on a soap box or deciding you know better than a medical professional (or an instagrammer you read does) is a good idea.

There are many moments in pregnancy and particularly birth where taking informed advice is critical to a positive outcome. There’s a reason they ask -it’s one way to assess some statistical risks to mother and baby. They have to ask everyone regardless of whether or not you look ‘slim’. Unless you have an ED it seems really performative to give your views on whether BMI is useful.