To decline weighing

[diiidum]

I’ve just had my booking appt for my first pregnancy and I declined to be weighed and measured height wise. I am a healthy weight and size 10 and have an active lifestyle but don’t believe BMI is particularly useful. My sister was weighed and developed a bit of an obsession with the number on the scale and still has it to this day.

I came to this conclusion after research. Sara Wickham did a post about it recently on instagram, saying even if you had a ‘high BMI’ risk doesn’t usually change. At my appointment they were remarking on how low risk I was until that point but they said they will have to ask the consultant if they are happy for me not to be weighed, otherwise I’ll be high risk and might not get to birth where I would like.

WIBU here? If it’s a big deal I can always get weighed at the next appointment, that’s what I thought to myself. In the end they asked me to let them know what I was when I last weighed myself and then said I looked about that now, but they will note all that down and that I declined being weighed today.

I don’t want to be misinformed so doing lots of research on everything relating to pregnancy really, and reading all the books and internet sources I can.

Was I wrong to decline? Is there benefit to them working out BMI?

I would have thought it was mainly just to track how much weight you gain during the pregnancy and whether it is much more or much less than expected and could lead to any problems for you or the baby. Will you stop them measuring the bump too?

You say in a earlier post that you came to the conclusion it wasn't needed due to the research you have done. Your research couldn't have been particularly robust because you seem surprised now that people are telling you the reasons for it. Perhaps leaving it to the professionals to guide you would be a better idea. Research is a word thrown about on mumsnet all the time. The reality of most of this research that is undertaken by your average person is that it will be skewed to their own needs. It is very rare that proper robust research weighing up all the information is done by the average person claiming to have done their research.

Do you feel you have mental health issues? Otherwise why would you develop her issues? Don't you think she might have become obsessive over something else?

No, and maybe you’re right. It’s just hard when you watch someone close to you experience that!

You’re right, as I’ve said there’s lots for me to learn and I have reflected

Targeted ads on this thread ? 🤔

if you don’t want to know the number (which I agree with you regarding bmi). I’d just tell them not to tell you the number and anything regarding the weight (you should loose weight/ put on weight advice)

Once you get past a certain point they measure the bump too. Pregnancy has all kinds of things like this. Unless you have an eating disorder I can’t see why you’d care how much you weigh? Do you not know roughly already anyway?

I just wanted to add- I vomited so much during my pregnancy, I was losing weight. It was useful for them to monitor me and know if they needed to think about intervening.

Same here. I was admitted to hospital with both pregnancies and lost a lot of weight.
At 40 weeks I weighed 5lb heavier than before pregnancy. Fortunately the baby was a healthy 8.5lb.

Maybe you could be weighed but look away so you're not aware of the number? Many patients feel more comfortable doing this and it's perfectly OK. Good luck with your pregnancy.

I was never weighed in pregnancy. They just asked me what I thought I was at the beginning.

I was weighed but just asked not to see. They were fine with it. They need to know but I don't unless I was obese

"They" will have to ask the consultant if "they are happy" for you to decline?!
I would cancel all further appointments with this maternity team and look else where.
They seem to forget whose body it is and who is birthing.
You're doing a fabulous job standing firm. Decline away! Dr. Sara Wickham's research is so detailed and up to date.

Well done OP. Enjoy your pregnancy and baby

Jesus wept, just get weighed. It’s not just about BMI.

Even if BMI is of limited use for an individual, one of the things that the NHS is genuinely amazing at is information on population levels, because they have hugely standardized data of a big population.

So yes, fine, do all your research, but I highly doubt there are much better indicators on a POPULATION level. And there, too, your data are useful. To be honest, I think it's one way an individual can contribute to our understanding of health.

So YABU.

@diiidum

Glad you have reflected and are going to have normal health measurements that may help your pregnancy.

A friend of mine lost weight during her pregnancy due to not known, under-lying health condition. Knowing her start weight was crucial in finding out what her medical condition was - some kind of crohn's disease.

The measurements aren't just about risk factors for overweight. The baby growth charts are now tailored to your height and weight. I am small, so when my baby measured at 60-somethingth centile in absolute terms, it was over 90th on my personalised chart, needed follow-up testing for diabetes and growth scans, and could have affected my choices about delivery if baby hadn't come early spontaneously. It might be worth reconsidering as these baseline measurements could well be useful and important later and allow you to make better informed decisions.

Don't they need to compare it over time - for health reasons?

Lol @ Waiting for the consultant tobokay. I think that's your job.

I would also go for the just get weighed and ask not to be told the number if you are concerned about becoming fixated on it. The staff can always then highlight a particular issue if they are worried about it for some reason, but otherwise if you think you are a healthy weight then it’s unlikely you will need to be aware of it in terms of specifics, but the staff have it if they need it for whatever reason (calculation of drug doses, monitoring etc)

Have just read through and it's good to see you are reconsidering.

Just to add, I was only weighed at booking and for the combined screening. There was no tracking of weight in my midwife appointments.

I would get weighed to be honest but put the number in a box and forget about it
I got weighed several times in pregnancy. I had bad sickness through out the first and third trimesters and had issues with low weight gain. It was reassuring to know to have that monitoring to know it was just into the healthy range and that I wasn't doing baby harm. Especially in the third trimester when I started to lose weight again before restarting anti sickness tablets and heartburn medication.
It a crude blunt tool but it can give an idea if things are ticking along as normal. I believe they try to weigh women towards the end of pregnancy so that there's an accurate weight on record if you need and emergency anaesthetic but don't know the validity of this.

I think you are very wise to question whether all the "offers" of care are applicable and feel right to you.

I was just looking at some NHS statistics today and if you had a baby last year, as a first time mum, you had a 39% chance of that baby coming out your vagina without instruments or major abdominal surgery.

If you had your baby 10 years ago, like me, you had a 52%. I was not weighed or had my baby's growth obsessively charted. It is vital to be aware of the culture you are birthing into. And it's ok to say no to stuff.

You could just ask them not to tell you what it is/don't look at the scales? That way they get the info needed to give you the best care and you don't have the number to worry about