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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have said “oh well”

145 replies

Eastre · 31/03/2024 13:19

Whenever I’m in the garden these past few weeks next doors child sticks his head over the fence asking what I’m doing.
Hanging the washing out
cleaning the pavers
playing with the dog … constant “what are you doing?” “Why are you doing that?” Etc etc
its driving me nuts.
this morning I went out to do some gardening, he sticks his head over and asks what I’m doing. I said “gardening” he said “why?” I said “because I want to”.

He persistently tried to talk to me over the fence and I just wanted to get on in peace. Anyway I put the lawnmower on and could hear him trying to shout over it to me but I ignored it. When I turned it off he said “I don’t like you using that, it’s noisy” so I said “oh well” and turned it back on and carried on cutting the grass.

when I’d finished his mum appeared over the fence asking if everything was ok. I said it was so she said her son had gone in upset saying I had told him off!! This is not true at all, I just didn’t want to stand there chatting all day! I told her he’d said he didn’t like the sound of the lawnmower but my grass needs cutting unfortunately! She said “no worries” with a bit of an eye roll and went back inside. Was I out of order?? I just want to enjoy my garden in peace!

OP posts:
InterIgnis · 31/03/2024 14:16

RichPetunia · 31/03/2024 14:09

All kids go through the why phase. A little patience and little chat back and forth costs nothing.

Except time, patience, and the will to live.

DaBlackCatsAreDaBestCats · 31/03/2024 14:16

You did nothing wrong. The kid sounds a fucking pest and the mother thinks it’s his entitlement to shout through the fence hence the eye roll. Honestly my blood boils for you. Nail wood over the hole or put up a higher fence, whichever will keep his beak out. Fucking cheek.

Moveoverdarlin · 31/03/2024 14:17

That would drive me nuts. Put up some trellis so he can’t keep poking his head over.

MississippiAF · 31/03/2024 14:19

Well done in discovering his kryptonite. You’ll have a very well-manicured lawn this year…

DaBlackCatsAreDaBestCats · 31/03/2024 14:20

It’s the entitlement. Why can’t people use their gardens without having to engage with some pest. It’s a real bugbear of mine

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 31/03/2024 14:20

KimFan · 31/03/2024 14:15

Put up a higher fence 🤣

This. Good fences make good neighbours

Liv999 · 31/03/2024 14:21

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 13:21

I hate to be that guy, but it does sound as if this child is ND. The asking why you are doing things is textbook.

Either that or he's massively spoilt or entitled. Only you know.

It sounds hugely irritating and she should parent her child.

I wouldn't think ND at all, every single child goes through a why phase, it's absolutely normal, in fact I'd find it more unusual if they didn't ask questions

guidelinespls · 31/03/2024 14:21

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IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:23

Liv999 · 31/03/2024 14:21

I wouldn't think ND at all, every single child goes through a why phase, it's absolutely normal, in fact I'd find it more unusual if they didn't ask questions

Oh please don't quote me again. I was hoping with the influx of posts about fences I'd escaped from the harassment of PPs who are still offended I suggested it as a possibility (and acknowledged that equally he could just be a twat) 3 pages ago 😭😭

Oneofthesurvivors · 31/03/2024 14:25

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:23

Oh please don't quote me again. I was hoping with the influx of posts about fences I'd escaped from the harassment of PPs who are still offended I suggested it as a possibility (and acknowledged that equally he could just be a twat) 3 pages ago 😭😭

No one is offended. We just think it's a ridiculous suggestion considering ALL children do it.

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:26

Oneofthesurvivors · 31/03/2024 14:25

No one is offended. We just think it's a ridiculous suggestion considering ALL children do it.

I don't care. Hope that helps.

Fannyfiggs · 31/03/2024 14:28

Are they the neighbours who got a stool for the wee boy to see over your fence and then went inside using you, pretty much, as a free babysitter when you were sitting in your garden?

Alwaystired23 · 31/03/2024 14:38

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 13:28

Anybody remember the thread about the woman who would always stick her head up, and when OP made her fence higher she bought a trampoline so sue could carry on bouncing to talk to OP, or did I dream it?

I remember that thread.

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:39

Alwaystired23 · 31/03/2024 14:38

I remember that thread.

Posted it further up. As funny as I remember the first time I think there was some questions over whether it was real but it did its job and made me laugh

fatphalange · 31/03/2024 14:41

I understood that, @HelloMiss but the OP clearly wasn't BU in any way shape or form. Maybe she's just venting in the hope the neighbour is a MNer

DaBlackCatsAreDaBestCats · 31/03/2024 14:49

Fannyfiggs · 31/03/2024 14:28

Are they the neighbours who got a stool for the wee boy to see over your fence and then went inside using you, pretty much, as a free babysitter when you were sitting in your garden?

😱

Mummame2222 · 31/03/2024 14:50

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 13:21

I hate to be that guy, but it does sound as if this child is ND. The asking why you are doing things is textbook.

Either that or he's massively spoilt or entitled. Only you know.

It sounds hugely irritating and she should parent her child.

No it doesn’t. It sounds like a typical child.

guidelinespls · 31/03/2024 14:51

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IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:52

Mummame2222 · 31/03/2024 14:50

No it doesn’t. It sounds like a typical child.

If only 10 posters had said that. Please leave me alone 😭😭

IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:52

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Oh wow

MeMyCatsAndMyBooks · 31/03/2024 14:54

No. The parents should be watching him/stopping him hang over the fence and bugging you.

Parenting issue not a you issue.

Mummame2222 · 31/03/2024 14:57

I do empathise. I know this makes me really mean but I really dislike when children I don’t know ask me to watch them do stuff in the soft play constantly. I just want to play with my son and enjoy him, the other parents cba to play with their kids (or need a break - which is fine) but I really don’t want to do it 😂😂😂

guidelinespls · 31/03/2024 14:57

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IWasAimingForTheSky · 31/03/2024 14:58

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No not you, the opinion 😭

guidelinespls · 31/03/2024 14:59

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