Ds won’t sit at the table

[Atthefarmnow]

Has one mouthful of food jumps down and just runs round. It’s doing my head in. He doesn’t seem to notice he’s hungry but must be … help.

How old is he?

He’s 3

Does he go to nursery and sit down there?

He does yes

If you’re on Instagram, follow Charlotte Stirling-Reed. (sr_nutrition). She has loads of helpful advice on this. Basically, role model sitting at the table and eating with them if possible, have a rule that food stays at the table and they can’t take it with them etc. Have regular routines around mealtimes and snacks, not random grazing on snacks etc. Her approach is very much we as parents are in charge of what there is to eat and kids are in charge of how much. Also check how much milk he’s having etc.

Can you give some more information?

What does he do after he runs round? Are there other people eating? What do you say/do?

Sit and eat your meal at the same time or sit and have a cup of tea at the table with him.
Just be consistent and keep on telling him to come back, sit down and either eat some more or wait to get down until you have finished your tea/meal.
You could also get him to ask before he gets down - “Please may I leave the table?”. This will help when he starts school and has to wait before he can go out and play at lunchtime.

He’s a bit of an anomaly and never snacks because he won’t eat his meals then. He’s always been a crap eater but he used to eat in front of the TV. Now he won’t even do that 😭

At 3, my ds was still in a high chair. The ikea one. At 4 we moved to a booster seat on the chair. Both had straps. All meals were taken at the table at that age. Still aged 11, its maybe breakfast and lunch on laps but all cooked dinners at the table.

Today he’s eaten

One boiled egg, refused the toast
half a ham sandwich
that’s it

he has been ill recently but he ate everything at nursery yesterday and Wednesday

I’ve never shoved him anywhere fyi

I think the thing is i don’t care where he eats as long as he eats but

Sorry pressed post … he just doesn’t. Wherever he is he just keeps running off and getting this or that or talking bollox at you!

Hi OP my DS is like this and he's now diagnosed with ADHD. I spent years trying to get him to sit down. Now I just encourage him to stay in his place, but I don't make him sit. The most important thing is not to make mealtimes stressful or unpleasant, so keep encouraging and trying to lengthen the time he spends eating, but don't get angry or start punishing. Also it's not necessarily true that they will eat when they are hungry - my DS growth slowed a lot at one point, we think it was due to not eating enough. We try to give him fruit smoothies with milk to get extra calories in.

If he listened to his body he’d eat sweet FA though!

I am unsure why rigidly sitting at the table means he listens to his body. I think the worry is the poor appetite and he’s always been the same, unless other children are around and then he’s fine.

@Waffleson this is my worry … making him sit down just turned mealtimes horrible. We moved house and didn’t have a table for a week and resorted to tv dinners and suddenly it was ok although still needed encouragement.

Now though that seems to have lost its allure!

Another tip is to make meals interesting by having lots of different bits and pieces, eg carrot sticks to dip in houmous and ketchup. Things they can pick up with their hands. I let my DS put ketchup on literally anything.

But if you don’t sit him down each time he gets up or tell him to sit down he will never learn and continue to keep running around at meal times

I just wish he liked and was interested in food … today at a play area I watched a family sit and nicely eat a picnic. That would never happen here 😭

The thing is @Coconutter24 I do know what you’re saying. But he has learned at nursery and with other children. So he can and will do it. Just not with me. And it is becoming a problem, I’m worried about his diet and him becoming u well and unhealthy.

Is there anything he likes to eat? My DS loves kebabs on skewers and chicken wings. He gets chicken drumsticks in his school lunchbox. If you can find particular textures or types of food he likes then go with it! Mine also loves babybels and monkey nuts, as he loves opening them.

3 is still very young, the world is an exciting place when you are three, he may just settle down with time. So don't worry overly, but maybe measure his height/weight every 6 months if you are concerned. Mine is now 8 and still can't sit down!!

Will he eat all his dinner at nursery whilst he’s sat with the other children? If he’s eating his dinner at nursery I wouldn’t worry especially as he’s only 3, all mine have gone through phases at a young age of hardly eating and they are fine. Give him some gummie vitamins daily.