'Clean your own house'

[LovelyTheresa]

This is just something that bugs me about this site. Every time there is a thread about the etiquette of employing a housecleaner, whatever the question is, someone invariably says 'clean your own house'. Why is that? It is so utterly bizarre, nobody would say 'do your own plumbing' 'do your own plastering' or even 'do your own garden' so why is it seen as so odd to have a cleaner!? I have a cleaner, everyone I know has a cleaner. It is only on this site that that is seen as out of the ordinary.

How many hours a week are you working / commuting?

I also like my home to be nice, that’s why I employ someone to help me achieve that!

Really? A lot of people where I live have a cleaner! (Up north and not an affluent area at all)

Surely anyone saying “do your own cleaning” is in response to someone whining about their cleaner / cost of their cleaner?
I can’t think of any other instance where anyone would even mention it.

I commute for an hour each day by bicycle in total. Unless you guys are crushing up crisps and throwing them on the floor, how do you get so messy you need a cleaner?

Exactly. My world isn't the same as yours. The OPs statement that everyone she knows has a cleaner made it sound unusual if you don't. I was just challenging that statement. Am I not allowed on MN because I perhaps only know lower income families?

I don’t know anyone who has a cleaner either!

I think it’s due, at least in part, to the fact that many people look down on cleaners/cleaning as a profession. They see paying someone to clean your house as taking advantage of the poor cleaner who wouldn’t have to clean for a living if people only cleaned their own homes. However, as someone who grew up with a parent who worked as a cleaner, I’m grateful that people did hire my Mum to clean as it put a roof over our heads and food on our table. There’s nothing shameful in how my Mum earner a living!

Well - it’s not like we don’t do any tasks at all outside of the cleaner. We still cook and wash up, have some laundry to do etc.

You may have radically more energy than me, but I personally found it very hard to keep on top of the household tasks with a young family as well as working a full time job.

I found it soul destroying to watch the degradation of the house over the week, and get home from work and have to be thinking about cleaning bathrooms or mopping floors. Having to cook and wash up every evening on top of the bedtime routine takes up enough hours!

It’s a luxury to employ a cleaner, but it really helps my sanity and ability to enjoy life.

If everyone cleaned their own houses poor cleaners would have no work! (I haven't had a cleaner for several years so I'm not being defensive.)

When we did have a cleaner it was more about "buying some of our own spare time back" to better enjoy the weekend with less chores rather than "I'm too good to clean my own house". Time is precious! It also made us keep the house tidy and uncluttered in order to make the most of the cleaning, so that was a bonus.

I've been on Mumsnet for a long time and I don't recognise that at all

Loads of people suggest getting a cleaner, I can't remember many people commenting to clean your own house.

Odd thread

And YABU. Or YANBU. Who knows

It's not just here on MN

A colleague recently told a long, convoluted story over lunch to explain why they had to employ a cleaner and seemed slightly surprised to discover that in our group of people grabbing a sandwich, no one batted an eye.

We turned out to be a good mix of people who had 'always had, grown up with cleaners, people who were or had been cleaners (who could point out that it can be a very useful flexibly job in the right circumstances ie created decently as we are at work) and people who would never dream of having someone in their house (whether they were home or out for the duration).

As it turned out, no long explanation needed. No one would say that we should clear our offices, why wouldn't we pay someone decent wages to keep our homes clean.

My cleaner has a cleaner actually! We discussed it only last week

The cleaner does:

• some element of tidying
• deep clean of kitchen and bathrooms
• Hoovering whole house
• Mopping of floors (all downstairs)
• sweeping of back and front garden
• bins
• dusting
• laundry - ironing and folding
• other ad hoc stuff as needed - cleaning fridge, oven etc

I find that quite time consuming on top of working full time + commuting + young family.

Well, maybe (almost certainly) I also have lower standards than you 😁

I also (and this will sound awful, but hey) think that cleaning up after oneself is a good life lesson. True, right now I'm basically modelling "Mummy cleans up after you and sometimes you help", but I still think that's better than "A lady comes in and does it for us" - especially if that's actually "You classmate's mum comes in and does it for us" (I've known this to happen!).

And yes, we could all argue about why it's OK for other things to be outsourced, but we all draw the line somewhere and have different priorities.

I use a huge amount of my pip for a housekeeper as I have autism and adhd. It’s literally transformed my life but I do get a lot of comments about it . I get no comments at all about having a gardener but that’s because I also have a physical issue and people accept I can’t do gardening due to that but struggle with the concept of me needing a housekeeper

You sound very defensive OP, why is that? I don’t know anyone who has a cleaner. Not my friends, none of my relatives, none of my DH’s family. I have not spoken to a single person in real life who has one.

That doesn’t mean I look down on those who do, I’d LOVE for someone to come round and deep clean my house from top to bottom but I can’t afford it. I once paid for someone to clean my oven and it was heaven.

But you’re wrong that everyone has a cleaner. Thats not a snobby attitude, it’s the truth. In this country, more people don’t have cleaners than do. You’re very fortunate to have support.

Bit of a leap @LovelyTheresa. Nobody cares whether you have a cleaner or not.

@RegretMisery

just personally don't understand how you can not want to clean you own home. For me, my home is a point of pride for me.

As mine is a point of pride and pleasure for me, too.

I just feel no inclination to actually do it myself and am confident that our 'Treasure' does a consistently much better job than I ever would. I'm please to have all the benefits of a clean and shining house to come home to without any of the effort required.

Horses for courses.

Perhaps I frequent different threads but “get a cleaner” is the No1 bit of advice, followed by “Hello Fresh/Gousto twice a week”, meal planning, and batching cooking, for busy parents.

We have a cleaner and it doesn’t save us any time because we weren’t doing any cleaning before . Pros: clean house, tidy house from frantic tidying before she comes. Cons: frantic tidying, cost, also the only day we could get was the day I have off with DS so I can’t bum around at home with him while she’s there, then he undoes all her good work immediately

I have a cleaner because we both work full time and commute and I did not want to spend my weekends or downtime cleaning when I could spend it with my family, my cleaner does more in two hours than I would in six and means if I don't have time to do the floors, vacuum clean the job and do the toilets, I know they have been done at least once a week

I would love a cleaner, but it doesn't make sense in our situation.

We live in a smallish end of terrace and have 3 kids under 4.

Things get dirty/messy all the time. The cleaner would literally have to be here all day long.

Well the cleaner isn’t with us full time you know, day-to-day everyone is still expected to be tidy and put things in the bin, put their toys away etc. We still have to empty the dishwasher, sort laundry and so on - it’s not like the entire domestic load has vanished.

It just lessens the burden.

I’m not failing to teach my children a life lesson by having a cleaner come and help a few hours a week FGS

Yes inevitably someone will say do it yourself but not most. I think develop a thicker skin.

alright for some. Isn't that benefits fraud?

really ? That’s odd