Aibu to think most "gifted" children come from well off, affluent families?

[Blueballoons1]

Eg start instruments or sports very early, can afford top tuition, often a parent has the skills to teach the dc at home, they have the time & money to travel around the country for events.. Parents oversee practice is done at home.. Whereas they may well be quite medicore compared to a child with raw talent whose parents just cannot afford what it takes..
I just feel for music, sports or academics money & an affluent background is part of the parcel for the majority of "gifted kids"..

Well it's more likely for lots of reasons. Intelligent parents are more likely to have good high paying careers. They're also more likely to value academics/extracurriculars, and have the financial means to support their children in pursuing them and developing their gift.

My mother was right, then. I was swapped at birth.

I wonder what my real parents did for a living?

It's about opportunity and parental engagement. You might show an aptitude for something but only if (a) you had the opportunity to do it in the first place and (b) your parents can afford for you to do it. And then you need your parents to take you. Swimming is one that costs for club membership, kit and then your parents have to take you to training and events.

A lot of people who went to private schools seem to be good at everything - sport, music, etc. But it's probably not only because the talents weren't evenly shared out, but because of the above factors.

But surely if it's genetic, 'gifted' kids will be more likely to be from affluent families, as their parents' 'gifts' are more likely to have contributed towards earning more money?

My son has ADHD and I was reading a book the other day that said a much higher percentage of children with ADHD come from deprived family backgrounds. The reason, it argued, is because having ADHD makes you less likely to achieve in school/career, and it is genetic, so lower-achieving ADHD parents are more likely to have ADHD kids.

Prince Harry.
I rest my case.

there's a lot of ADHD in my family and most of the ones with ADHD are highly intelligent but never met their potential. That makes sense to me.

I was thinking about a similar point at the weekend. DD was updating me about a girl she went to school with who is very talented at sport as well as getting 3 A stars at A level and is at Oxford. DD was friends with her at primary level and although went to the same (selective) private school they ended up in different friendship groups so she is just in indirect contact now (mutual friends and social media) but had bumped into her recently. She has always been pretty amazing - always busy, played two sports at regional level (including swimming with lots of early morning training), lots of other hobbies etc. and a part time job in sixth form. Plus a nice girl and very sociable She is apparently now a future olympics possibility in a third sport taken up more recently (not Paris, the next one) and still has lots of other hobbies. Between her sport, hobbies and academics she must never just sit down and chill in front of the tv.

She did have a very pushy mum (possibly dad too, but less visible). She definitely has the right build for the sports she does but i was wondering how much of her work ethic is down to the pushy parenting with lots of clubs from a young age so not used to having downtime and how much is just her.

It depends which test you use. Mensa, for example, accepts the top 2%, which could be 132 on a Stanford-Binet, 130 on Wechsler, or 148 on a Cattell test. Not very helpful I know!

The most gifted child I have ever met did not come from the classic middle class pushy family at all - nice people who just got on with things and produced a daughter who could read chapter books at 2, much to their surprise.

But I do also agree that - and I am not saying the autistic savant cliche here - the vast majority of highly gifted people are also neurodiverse to some degree. I went to Oxbridge some time ago and there was, with hindsight, so much undiagnosed ND in my college that it now seems very sad. Since then three of my friends have admitted that they believe they are autistic, and I've been diagnosed with ADHD. (And just look at how a college, which provides meals and cleaning, is an excellent support system for a ND physics boffin...)

But I also agree, that while this can mean an intense focus (I also know an autistic Olympic athlete), this is also why being gifted doesn't always translate to being the highest earner...

@surreygirl1987

I’m not just talking about kids of over average intelligence, for whom that may apply somewhat. I’m talking about the truly “gifted”; once in a generation sports players/super maths geniuses etc.

I’m not just talking about the phenomenon whereby bright parents tend to have bright children. Even this is slightly overstated tbh: there’s a strong genetic component to intelligence but you get outliers: if there were never smart kids from poor backgrounds you wouldn’t have any social mobility. There will always be some people who buck the genetic and economic odds.

An attentive SAHM mother might know her child forgets or loses things and develops systems to assist them with executive function. They will also actively encourage whatever special interest the child has and have the funds for extra classes, coaches, hobby equipment etc.

An attentive stay at home mother mum? One of those! 😂

It's been the same forever. So many artists, composers and great historical poets have just been aristocrats doing a hobby. They may have been good, but I always wonder what kind of great gifted creativity we've been deprived of because someone was born working class rather than the lord of an estate

OP, academics aren't expensive. Quite the opposite.

I grew up in a free school meals family of seven. Money was worse than tight yet we all won places at highly competitive grammar schools and have degrees and post grad qualifications.

We all spent most childhood Saturdays in the local library. It's free. We had nothing else to do and nowhere to go. It was our escape.

I can see how it would be hard to learn the violin or the finer points of archery without expensive kit & tuition though.

So many artists, composers and great historical poets have just been aristocrats doing a hobby

Mementomorrisons how many aristocrats have become famous composers?
Genuine question as I can’t think of many except maybe Lord Berners and his works aren’t well known.
Tchaikovsky came from a middle class background, Schubert’s mother was a housemaid, Britten’s father was a dentist (so professional class but not aristocratic), John Lennon and Paul Macartney were certainly not aristocrats.

Yes of course...! My comment was because YOU claimed it's genetic! 🤦🏼‍♀️

@surreygirl1987

Yes of course...! My comment was because YOU claimed it's genetic

It wasn’t just me; several people posted this. It is mainly genetic but there are always exceptions.

I think the gifted are equally spread through the population, but kids from more affluent backgrounds MAY (not always) get better opportunities/support/encouragement to exploit their gifted status.

Certainly average kids from more affluent backgrounds tend to fo better overall than equivalent from other backgrounds as often better opportunity aspiration etc.

In nearly forty years of teaching piano, violin and viola, I have had a number of pupils who showed aptitude for their instruments but only one who was truly gifted. He was certainly not born with a silver spoon in his mouth and his parents have made tremendous sacrifices to help him. He is home schooled and has been encouraged every step of the way. He is now a junior scholar at one of the London music colleges on Saturdays. His talent has been recognised there as he regularly works with people two or three years older than he is. I think money can be a huge help, but the most important factor in the development of a gifted child is the support and involvement of the family. Truly gifted children are a rarity, but I think that true aptitude will shine through regardless of financial circumstances.

That's exactly it. It's the time that parents can afford to support too.
As I said many kids at the very top of their talent are homeschooled as traditional school just doesn't work around their activity.

Very good point, the amount of kids doing gofundme to try & fund their hobby is very crazy.. It definitely shouldn't be like this. It's mainly sports, I havn't seen kids go fund me for music or academics

Because that is the group that get to display their talent! All very gifted children should be able to shine but to get to the very top eg competing nationally & internationally takes money, parental time & so much effort.

My nephew is gifted at sports. He is one of the most recognised names in his sport but my sister and her idiot partner were totally unsupportive and more interested in drink and drugs. We tried to help by driving him to games training etc but his achievements are purely down to him. But if you talk to my sister now you would think she was the most supportive mother in the world and doesn’t understand why he won’t support her and pay for her to live in a nice house and fund her lifestyle. He achieved everything in his life through to hard work and doesn’t owe it to her.

My DH is gifted and has done well for himself despite no parental support and being born into a council house. Can't remember his IQ but it's in the top 1%, over 160. Obviously life would of been better for him if he's been born into an affluent family and he could of made better use of his abilities.

This is my thinking too. I think that those who are truly gifted are probably earning fairly well themselves, and also generically more likely to have children who are gifted.

I believe that we all have a natural ceiling on our intelligence; but your experiences determine your ability to reach your own genetic potential. So two 0
people with identical potential genetics (like siblings) can still achieve different outcomes, through things like education, diet, health conditions, social standing, and their own personal aspirations.

My eldest is predicted 4 A*s at A-Level as is applying to Oxbridge. His father and I separated when he was 6 (extremely acrimoniously) and for a little while he and his younger brother was entitled to free school meals etc as my income was very low. He's also August-born.
It's absolutely possible!