To think that he should pay more rent?

[FairPlayer]

Hi all, my partner and I are planning to move in together soon. (Currently living at my parents together until we've found somewhere) Currently I pay rent to my parents so he Is effectively living rent free whilst he sorts out his finances. I'm okay with this for now. What I'm concerned about is that he has 3 children so obviously we would need to find a 2 or even 3 bedroom house so that they can stay as both him and his ex wife want it to be 50/50 custody.
I'm more than happy for this to be the case but don't feel that it's fair that we split the rent equally between us. If he didn't have children we would be looking at getting a 1 bedroom flat and it would cost 300 less a month.

He earns 10k a year more than I do but has a lot more financial commitments than me. Child maintenance (private arrangement and not through cms) being the biggest chunk leaving his account every month. (Ex wife unwilling for this to be reduced even when children are with us 50/50 which I guess is another issue)

I don't have children so I'm not sure if I'm being reasonable in my thinking and want some opinions please.

Maintenance is not "free money" 🤨

Please don't financially commit yourself to this man. My ex was very happy to live with me rent free before we got together. I ignored the warning signs and the marriage was a disaster (for lots of reasons but his attitude to money came into it). It's a certain sort of person who is happy to live off his girlfriend's parents. No matter how "nice" he appears (of course he's nice - he's very happy with his cushy arrangements), this is NOT the sort of person you want to be financially tied to. I wish I'd heeded the warning signs as breaking up from this type of entitled person, as you can imagine, is unbelievably difficult and stressful.

Oh dear OP is probably reeling from the comments.
Sorry OP I agree with them all. I can’t imagine any context where this sounds a good idea based on what you’ve told us.

No doubt you are in love. It’s hard to see clearly with hormones raging but relationships have many phases and all of them longer than the heady early days.
Are you a saviour type? Do you like to see yourself as The One who can make him happy?

How old are you both? Do you want children? How old are his? Why did he split from his wife?

And how do you think this is going to change if you get a place with him? I suspect it will be you paying the rent because f his other commitments.

So much is wrong here, but what self respecting grown man (and father of three!) would expect to live rent free with his girlfriend's parents?!

If he was 19 years old and childfree and you posted about him on here, people still would have told you he was a sponger for living off your parents and not chipping in financially.

Absolutely don't move in with him. He needs to sort his life out before he joins it to yours.

If you can't live without him, fine, date him. But don't start subsidising this man and his family.

You are free as a bird. That is worth everything.

I agree you should pay less . The simplest way would be that he pays 2/3 of all bills and you pay 1/3.

Or you could list all your income and expenses and see what each of you have left. Then come to a compromise on who pays what.

You also need to consider food as well and holidays.

Better to have a talk about all this now.

Couldn't put it better myself. All I could think was why the hell would anyone put up with this?