To get DD a drum kit?!

[LittleDrummerGirrl]

Not really an AIBU as we've already got it but after thoughts on considerate usage really!

DD is 10 and has been learning drums for 18m and has been keen for her own kit for yonks, but I have always said no: We live in a terrace, don't have the space, need to prove you're committed (time wise) etc.

Well almost on impulse I have bought her one for her birthday 🤷🏼‍♀️😂 reasons being she never commits to anything and we've been impressed at both that and her ongoing progress, plus have moved house (still in a terrace but now has her own room)... It just seemed right.

However, we are Still in a terrace and have only just moved in so I really don't want to piss the neighbours off too much! 😂

Suggestions from those who have experience both sides appreciated! She hasn't been given it yet but gets it later today (tomorrow at the latest)...

Name changed as quite outing if you know us (or are our new neighbours!!) 😁

How lovely for your 10 year old.

If I was your neighbour I'd take up the violin, or develop a deep love for Deathmetal that had to be satisfied at 3am in the morning. I'd be absolutely as considerate as you are.

Hi! I'm a drummer. There are so many benefits to using an electric drumkit over an acoustic especially when learning. You can play along to practice material, metronomes and your favourite tunes all plugged into an external digital device (eg phone) using headphones. There is really no major benefit to having a real drum kit until you are in a position that you want to play with others.

If you went down the electric route the one thing you might want to consider is having a practice pad that is more like playing a real drum as the response is difference. If she has lessons her drum teacher should be able to advise this - but its only something to consider if she starts to really take it seriously. FWIW - I have had an electronic drum kit for 25 years and would never consider playing an acoustic in the house.

Also - if your daughter was at all unsure and shy about her skills - it is a lot easier to play with the privacy of an electric kit until confidence grows.

I think it is brilliant you have brought her a drumkit but would advise electric over acoustic for the reasons given above.

I live in a terrace. Is there any way you could agree practice times with the neighbours and then stick to them? My DS wants to take up drumming but can't have a kit because of where we live.

I keep mine in a converted garage which is about 50 feet from my neighbours house.

You definitely can't keep it in the house. Like, really. You'd all go insane and she'd end up with no practice time.

Thankfully for us it was a relatively short-lived fad, but I can confirm that the neighbours on our road of detached houses very much minded! It is astonishingly loud and intrusive, but possibly difficult to appreciate until you've experienced it.

Has ANYONE tried this kit?? The reviews are excellent and might be the way forward...

I think I will go round and talk to the neighbours anyway and ask if they have any set times when they are out as a starter... 🤔

I know they're loud but so is a lawn mower or DIY and people put up with that if they know there's a start and finish time!

I understand the "only in a detached" brigade but I have heard drums in other houses and agree they are loud and would actually have to be not just in a detached but in a few acres of ground to totally avoid it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Yikes. Get a small shed and fit it out with soundproofing panels or get prepared for your neighbours to hate you.

I agree with this, actually! I think her lessons are only 15m anyway so would probably be about right 👌🏼

You cannot be serious.
Incredibly selfish.

I think you can do it - both me and my neighbour play - but it can't be in the house.
Get a lot of acoustic panels for your garage, and decent flooring down to dampen the sound, and quality dampeners for the drum heads.

My ds had a kit at that age in his bedroom. He didn’t practice for long, after school, and not after 5 or 6. Depends whether neighbours are at work. The house next door was flats so his bedroom was next to someone’s sitting room and he did complain, understandably, but by banging on the wall and telling him to shut the fuck up. We spoke about it, told him I understood but to speak like that to a child was unacceptable.
He didn’t work though, and if someone is home all the time I think they have to suck a certain amount up as no time would have worked for him. I think if you put a time limit on it it helps as neighbours know when it’s going to stop.
So, to be a good neighbour and to let him practice more, I spent a bloody fortune on an electric kit. The neighbour said it was worse and sounded like ds was throwing balls against the wall. Try practice and muffle pads.
See if there’s a Saturday rock school she could go to, it’s lovely to see more girls drumming.

This is a silly thing to say isn't it. She is 10 🙄 she will be on it max 15 min at a time during normal working hours, I'm not such a complete psycho as to even suggest it in the night time.... 🤦‍♀️😂

This thread is proof that some people simply cannot be reasoned with, and why there are so many nightmare neighbours other people are forced to contend with.

My dd has a drum kit and we are mid terrace.

I have things on the ends of her sticks that minimise the noise, pads on the actual drums that minimise it, I gave either side my number and told the to text if she's making noise at an inconvenient time, and she only practises at set times anyway usually.

Absolutely fine, and we've had no problems at all.

This

You really can't OP. It is far, far too loud. Electronic set with headphones is the best bet but even that travels a bit.

I'd be demented if my neighbour did this.

I agree. I play bass guitar and have a practice amp for the house in theory. But in practice, I always play unplugged at home. It's just loud enough that I can hear it and play but, even on the quietest volume setting, you can hear it all through the house if I play through a 15w practice amp.

I live in a terraced house too. It's just not fair on the neighbours.

Getting mesh heads might help, and playing with brushes or hot rods. And there are low volume cymbals as well.

exactly this.

Cannot believe you think it’s fine to have a drum kit in a terraced house

Very heartened to read of all these young drummers though!

We're struggling to find one for our new band - a good drummer is like hens' teeth!

Why would you not get an electric set with headphones?!

Mis-quoted up above, meant has anyone tried this....

Op, this thread has said you're totally unreasonable yet you're still going to do it anyway. Your poor neighbours. You don't really care about them at all, I don't know why you've posted here. The previous poster who you've quoted about playing loud music at 3am like they're crazy to suggest it... I bet you might find you start having some very inconsiderate neighbours of your own on your hands.

I have very similar ones to that and there are drum stick tips you can get too, they are great.

I did start with a cheap yoga mat that I cut up though (as recommended by dds drum teacher) and it worked well too.

Oh calm down, she's had advice about keeping it out of the house, how to dampen the sound, and she's looking at electric kits.

How do you think people become musicians? It isn't with a 15 minute lesson once a week.