To think something inside me is missing?

[Merryoldgoat]

The more I read on here and talk to people in real life the more I wonder if there’s something wrong with me: whether I’m damaged in some way.

The things that matter to many/most people just don’t bother me.

I’m no ‘cool wife’ or anything, this isn’t some kind of faux ‘aren’t I chill’ post.

I’m honestly wondering if I’m so damaged that these things don’t bother me.

Mothers’ Day - literally don’t care. Flowers would be nice but if I didn’t get any it’s a non-issue.

Ditto Valentines, Anniversary etc. Birthday it’s nice to get things but no big deal.

Friend pisses me off? Fine. Just cut them out and carry on.

All the angst I see/hear around - I get it intellectually but can’t muster much feeling.

I am on antidepressants but don’t feel numb, just more even.

But maybe I’m in denial.

Not sure what I’m expecting from this.

Sounds normal to me tbf!

That’s actually comforting!!!

Still sounds in the realm of normal to me. Do you remember feeling much differently before antidepressants?

Do you think you have an avoidant attachment style?

Totally normal and not a drama llama like very many posters on this site!

What makes you think you're damaged?

I don't give much of a fuck either. Mother's Day and Valentines Day mean nowt. If someone wrongs me then I just walk away and figure they were never worth it. I don't have a partner as I'm just not interested / don't like people in my space / cba. I'm very pragmatic and not terribly emotional. I'm also Autistic which may or may not be related.

It depends what the rest of your life is like, I guess. Is there joy in your life, things you love to do? That's more important I think.

Is it normal to cut a friend off if they piss you off? I’d have no friends at all!

I started ADs about 5 years ago for PND. I’ve tried to come off but I got very low again.

I’m on the lowest dose and it just keeps me on an even keels I’m also peri so don’t know if that is a complicating factor

Another goat!!

I don’t know what that means really. I’ll have a look.

You don’t sound like there’s anything wrong with you to me. Most men I know think similarly about all the things you listed and don’t question themselves for it at all! As long as you feel close and connected to a few key people in your life then you’re doing just fine.

I am exactly the same. Fuck drama!

Or ASD?

To be fair I don't give a toss about Valentines or New Year's specifically. I just never really have.

lol 😂

I deffo can be dramatic but I have a ‘big’ personality but just generally want to crack on.

Sounds normal to me.
The dramatic people who expect certain things for special days and get so stressed and upset over things like cards/flowers/people not being available to meet up as often as they'd like are the ones who seem abnormal. Bit of a narcissistic or unhealthily insecure/dependant personality.

The more I read on here and talk to people in real life the more I wonder if there’s something wrong with me

your sample is skewed. People who don’t care about these things don’t post online or go on about them in real life. I think you sound on the tougher end of normal!

Could easily be the anti depressants

Yes - lots of joy. I have lots of hobbies, great DH, kids are both autistic so have challenges but they’re pretty brilliant in lots of ways.

Life can be stressful though.

Interesting. I don’t THINK so. Both of my boys have ASD and I really don’t think I am, but certainly some traits.

This is probably a bit hyperbolic.

I mean if someone acts like an arsehole ok not bending over to repair things.

If someone pisses me off I’ll deal with it fairly directly but if they’re not up for being reasonable I can’t be arsed.

@RainbowZebraWarrior

There have definitely been some hard life experiences and I wonder if I’ve ignored the trauma but actually it’s affecting me without me realising.

I'm like this too, but I wouldn't cut off a friend just like that.

I think I was a bit ott with this (brevity).

Obv I disagree with people and that’s fine. But I’m not either seeking approval from people who very obviously don’t like and are being unreasonable

I feel like you about birthdays/valentines/mother's day, but that's because if my husband and family who are terrific all year so I'm not waiting for an occasion when they might prove that they see and appreciate me. I think that's what's behind the angst - the loneliness and despair of dedicating your time and love to people who take you for granted.

Normal here too. Couldn't care less about valentine's or mother's day. Never been in a situation with a friend where they act like a complete arsehole so can't comment on that, but a lot of stuff I just really CBA with.

No antidepressants or anything, it's just me. I like a quiet life