To think my DH should have eaten the dinner I cooked

[Rosebyanothername19]

I wfh full time and have to juggle picking up DC and taking to after school clubs etc. So don't have a huge amount of time for shopping/cooking delicious home made meals from scratch.

I managed to do a quick weekly shop the other day but was running out of ideas for dinners and grabbed a packet of something on offer that you just chuck all the ingredients in a bag and cook so it's nice and easy to prep and I can leave cooking while I do other stuff. We have had a couple in the past and my DH has said he didn't really like them, but this was was more Italian based which we eat a lot of so hoped it would be OK.

So tonight he sits down to dinner and just pulled a face and said I'm not eating this. I'll just make a sandwich. This caused my DC to say I don't want it either!

I managed to convince my DC to eat it and they enjoyed it, but my DH just sat there with a full plate and a face on.

I've gone to take DC to bed and he has gone to the shop to buy a pizza.

AIBU: I shouldn't have cooked it if there was a chance he wouldn't like it, forcing him to get his own dinner

Or

NBU: He should have eaten it and said maybe don't get that again?

[Whaleandsnail6]

I couldnt eat a meal I really didn't like, especially if it was all one thing (eg a pasta dish) so I couldnt just eat the part I like and leave the bit I don't.

I dont think either of you were wrong though...you and child enjoyed the food, dh didnt so sorted himself out later.

[Greengumby]

I don’t have an issue with an adult choosing not to eat something - after a childhood of being forced to eat things I didn’t and still don’t like, I now have control of my food choices.

However, DH needs to be respectful and realise he is a role model for DC, the way he refused was rude and created issues with DC at mealtime.

He should also be more appreciative that you cooked. Every meal does not need to be cooked for his tastes, if he doesn’t like what’s on offer he can get something else after DC have gone to bed…and he better be cooking his share of meals for the family.

[Rosebyanothername19]

@Whaleandsnail6

I couldnt eat a meal I really didn't like, especially if it was all one thing (eg a pasta dish) so I couldnt just eat the part I like and leave the bit I don't.

I dont think either of you were wrong though...you and child enjoyed the food, dh didnt so sorted himself out later.

Surely you would at least try it though? Not just refuse to eat it because you didn't like the other ones.

I served it with cous cous as per the serving suggestion.

[Cantara]

He didn't want it, so bought himself something he would eat... I wouldn't force anyone to eat something they didn't want.

[HelloMiss]

Can you afford takeaways?

[Devon1987]

He is rude. He could have at least tried it. I wouldn’t cook for him again without an apology. If wants certain meals he can do the food shop and bloody cook them.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

So tonight he sits down to dinner and just pulled a face and said I'm not eating this. I'll just make a sandwich. This caused my DC to say I don't want it either!

Rude, didn't try it, and in front of the kids. He was being an idiot.

If you try it and don't like it, in front of kids, you either suck it up or pretend to be full and eat later. You don't model shit behaviour.

[PTSDBarbiegirl]

CF and depressing. Don't cook another scrap for him.

[Mayorq]

"He should have eaten it and said maybe don't get that again?"

Absolutely
......


.......

"We have had a couple in the past and my DH has said he didn't really like them,"

Oh

[Rosebyanothername19]

@Greengumby

I don’t have an issue with an adult choosing not to eat something - after a childhood of being forced to eat things I didn’t and still don’t like, I now have control of my food choices.

However, DH needs to be respectful and realise he is a role model for DC, the way he refused was rude and created issues with DC at mealtime.

He should also be more appreciative that you cooked. Every meal does not need to be cooked for his tastes, if he doesn’t like what’s on offer he can get something else after DC have gone to bed…and he better be cooking his share of meals for the family.

Thank you for your response. I agree that it wasn't so much him not eating it (although he could have at least tried it!) But the way he went about it gave me a problem with DC not wanting to eat it and asking for something different.

He will begrudgingly cook sometimes but I still have to think of the meal and preferably buy the ingredients.

I'm so sick of meal planning for everyone's tastes, especially when I also have to ensure it is safe for various intolerances.

Maybe I should do spag bol every night as its the only thing that gets no complaints! Haha!

[Veggieburgers]

@PTSDBarbiegirl

CF and depressing. Don't cook another scrap for him.

A bit of an overreaction?

[OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon]

so he didn't have a sandwich
he has gone out to buy a pizza ?

spoilt !

maybe he could make time in the week or at the weekend to do an online shop, and meal plan too...

[Bumblebeeinatree]

Sounds like you knew he didn't like those sort of meals and bought it anyway. You were warned he probably wouldn't like it, why buy it? There must have been other alternatives that you knew he would have liked.

[Aria999]

Not sure about this. DH and I only cook things we know the other one will eat (he does the huge majority of the cooking) but we both have food phobias dating from childhood.

If we want to try something that we are not sure the other one will like then we check in advance.

I think if I had specifically told DH I didn't like something and he cooked it anyway I would be annoyed. But he would never do that and neither would I to him.

So yes he was rude but perhaps not unreasonable.

[TheYearOfSmallThings]

I wouldn't have eaten it if I didn't think I would like it, and Italian flavour stuff from a bag with couscous doesn't sound like something I would enjoy. No need for him to make a face about it, or put your children off eating it.

[Rosebyanothername19]

@Mayorq

"He should have eaten it and said maybe don't get that again?"

Absolutely
......


.......

"We have had a couple in the past and my DH has said he didn't really like them,"

Oh

This was a different one.

They are flavours from around the world and this one was Italian. We eat a lot of Italian food so I thought it would be OK.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

He will begrudgingly cook sometimes but I still have to think of the meal and preferably buy the ingredients.

Shame, because he just volunteered for cooking. In this house you can decide how the task is done and do it, or you can shut up. You don't get to expect someone else to do the task and they complain about how they did it.

[Radiatorvalves]

I kind of want to know what the meal was… he sounds a bit rude (esp in front of DC) but it didn’t sound great.

[LoubieIoo]

If you knew he doesn't like that type of thing it was pointless giving him it. But he didn't need to act that way in front of the kids.

[Rosestulips]

Option 3

let him write a fortnightly meal plan, make a shopping list and go out and get ingredients. Cheeky fuck

[johnboyo]

What was the meal?

[Rosebyanothername19]

@Radiatorvalves

I kind of want to know what the meal was… he sounds a bit rude (esp in front of DC) but it didn’t sound great.

It was Mediterranean chicken with peppers, courgette and carrots done in the bag (so juicy - if you get my meaning) with Cous cous

Nothing terribly outrageous!

[Createausername1970]

There is wrong on both sides.

Don't serve something you know someone doesn't like.

But he behaved badly, and definitely shouldn't have done it in front of the children.

But I do think it paves the way for a conversation about him doing his share of the cooking - and shopping for it. If he doesn't want to, then he either eats what he is given or sorts himself out.

[kitsuneghost]

I would have cooked it as it is a different style to the ones he didn't like. I would have no problem with him not liking and not eating it (note to self don't buy that again). But I would have being annoyed making a fuss in front of DC so putting them off it.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

COUS COUS is NOT ITALIAN. #TeamDH