For this to be the reason for breaking contact?

[Whyjustwhywhy]

I had no sleep (literally) last night so my judgement may be clouded.

I gave my brother a lift into town as he cannot drive at the moment. When there he bought a slice of pizza and a doughnut- fine. My three year old needed lunch so we went to the M & S cafe. I bought a spaghetti bolognaise for DS - small portion as for a child. I then went to change my baby’s nappy. While I was doing that, my brother reached over and took a huge helping of DS’s food, probably half his meal.

I am furious but am I overreacting?

But this is just a bit silly, your son is 3. There are many areas of a child’s life that, if that child was an adult would be unreasonable (heck even illegal in some cases) but because they’re children it’s really not that much of an issue.

Your brother was out of order taking any of your son’s food. Your husband is out of order for not saying anything. I can understand why you are annoyed. It must be hard looking after two children and also having your brother living with you. Add your husband into the mix and it sounds like you are looking after 4 kids.

My concern for you @Whyjustwhywhy is that your husband is not supporting you or backing you up, why isn't he?

Said

NO

How old is your brother?

Does he have any issues?

I do understand what you are trying (badly) to get at.

Your brother is happy to take food from a child (to feed himself, when he already has his own food) and leave a small toddler hungry and with half a meal.

Toddler had no power to stop this and Father didn't step in. I guess it's the imbalance of power you are angry about. And because you weren't to speak up for your child, then this unfairness happened.

You aren't overreacting.

Is adult social services involved? My nephew is 30 he's just lost his mother and we've called them in to help with housing.
You can still explain boundaries to him including other people's food.

Your brother should know better than to take food from anyone's plate, regardless of their age, without asking. I'd at the very least tell him you're not happy about that and expect it never to happen again.

I wouldn't be impressed by your husband constantly disregarding your opinions, either. In this case, I'd wonder if he's just trying to avoid drama, but he needs to back you up and present a united front.

Just dismisses most things I say.

Well that's a massive problem, @Whyjustwhywhy.

As is often says on MN, you have a DH problem at the heart of things.

May be create a thread in Relationships on this.

I have a 'troubled' brother too, now in his fifties. If he had done this to one of my children I would have challenged him but he would have turned it around on me in a spiteful way, saying I was over-reacting etc. And probably would have continued to 'joke' about it in front of my children. This is giving me the rage just imagining it and writing about it. I hear you, OP.
But I do have a massive back story in that I have previously baled him out (more than once) under terrible circumstances, never had any thanks or appreciation and have ended up going very, very LC. My children, now young adults, won't have anything to do with him now either because of the toll he has taken on me.

Only you can decide whether, for the sake of your own well-being, you need to cut him out of your life.

All the best to you. I understand 💐