Was I BU to leave the pub after being told off by the manager?

[EmptyTheFrickingBins]

I had booked a table for a group of seven people to celebrate a Ruby wedding anniversary. On arrival to the pub we found the table with our reservation and sat down to wait for the rest of party - this was at 4:30 which was our booked time.

Three other guests were already seated at the table and there was no indication that any other table had been reserved for us.

My parents - who are both elderly and disabled - arrived and I returned to the table with them where we asked the other guests if they'd be happy to share-- there would have been room and we couldn't move because the only free tables were for four or under. This was at 4:45 and we had been waiting for them to finish.

They reacted in a very angry way and stormed off from the table and must have informed the staff on the way out.

I just want to be clear - at no point where we rude or demanding.

We were viewing the menu when a manager in a pink top came over to the table and told us rudely that we shouldn't have asked the other guests to move (again - at no point did we do this), that another table had been reserved for us and we should have spoken to the staff - again none of this was indicated, and only the one table had our name on it!

I felt extremely embarrassed by the interaction - we sat at the table in good faith as it had the reserved sign on with our name.

The woman's attitude was awful and spoiled the night - we ended up leaving because we no longer felt welcome - everyone was looking at us as she told us off!

If they sorted another table they should have moved the sign. But you should have made yourself known to the staff when you arrived so that they knew you were claiming your booked table and could have told you they had found you another table. You shouldn’t have approached the other diners directly really. But the manager shouldn’t have had a go at you. Nobody really acted well in this scenario 🤣

Equally baffled as to why you didn't check the situation with staff upon arrival esp as you had elderly physically frail people in your party. Your request to share the table seemed reasonable but that wasn't how they heard it, or they were just awkward twats. The staff member was unprofessional in yelling at you and taking at face value what the departing people had said. Lots of silliness all round, not just you.

Sorry you are being unreasonable to approach the table while others were sat there, eating or not. They could have been waiting for a dessert.

Having been in a similar situation, we just spoke to the staff and asked when our table would be ready. As the other diners had not finished for our allotted time, they just popped some other tables together so we could sit together.

Delays happen, it's unfortunate but speaking to staff should have been your first port of call.

I’d have definitely approached the staff not the customers. If I’d have just finished a meal and other customers came and plonked themselves down joining us I’d be pretty pissed off.
who doesn’t ask the staff about the table and instead approaches other customers ?
sometimes they have to switch tables around In restaurants to accommodate people, some might take longer than planned to finish and others are quicker. Your name on a table didn’t give you the right to intrude.
The manager shouldn’t have bollocked you though.

The pub should have taken responsibility and apologised to everyone involved for causing this situation. That's just how customer service works. It doesn't matter if the OP acted oddly by sitting down at the table. People do act oddly sometimes - professional businesses take the hit and deal with it

This is just not normal - to sit down with strangers at a table !

This is so weird (unless I've totally misunderstood). So these people at the table when you arrived, who weren't of your own party of family/friends were already there having a meal - and you asked if you could sit there!!? Obviously they would have thought you were hurrying them off so your party could take over the table! I don't think I'd have been very happy if I'd been them, either! Why in the name of mick didn't you simply ask at the bar or speak to a waiter/waitress and tell them your booking name and the time you'd booked for? Why just assume you could plonk yourself down at a table where people had not yet finished their meal and were leaving? The pub might have had a spare table you could sit at while you waited - just ask, surely?

And why would the people already at the table been happy for you to just sit there with them? Why did you assume this was OK? They didn't know you from Adam, presumably. Strange.

As most others have said, you were in the wrong here for not just approaching the staff and getting it sorted instead of accosting other customers. But your replies make it clear you only want people to agree with you.

In our local hungry house they don't put your name on the reservation just the time the table is reserved from. You should have spoken to the staff before just plonking yourself down at a table you assumed was yours!

Note to self if ever I'm out at a busy pub or restaurant and a member of staff says we can sit and eat at a reserved table remove the name of the people who have booked a spot so that I don't have some random person plonk down next to me 😂😂 whilst trying to eat my food.

Yes as frustrating as this was at the time OP I would have spoken to member of staff not strutted up to table and sat next to some randoms 🙈.
I imagine they were embarrassed by your odd behaviour especially if they had been told by a member of staff to sit there just think how they would have felt to have had that done with others witnessing your behaviour towards them I'd have been annoyed as well.

You were very unreasonable, you should have spoken to staff, not passive aggressively joined the table - WTF?!

Just because a table has your name and reserved sign on, doesn't mean it's your personal table, you should speak to staff first if there were others sitting there.

So rude of you to sit at an already occupied table regardless of whether or not the table had an indicator on it that it was reserved for you, or that the occupants had finished eating.

Really, very rude. They were still using the table.

The regular behaviour in the situation you describe is to make yourself known to a member of staff who can make arrangements for your party to be seated.

You write that "The woman's attitude was awful and spoiled the night - we ended up leaving because we no longer felt welcome".
I imagine the people who were occupying the table you sat at could have written exactly the same sentence.

It was the staff's place to ask them to leave. And I know technically you didn't do that @EmptyTheFrickingBins but parking yourself at a table where they were sitting and chatting (and I assume from your attitude on this thread huffing and puffing about the 'reserved in our name and time slot' thing) was actually exactly that.
Going somewhere else is just "I'm taking my ball back and going home".

Did your parents have a nice meal elsewhere?

@m00rfarm because none of us were there it seemed strange to include the colour of the offending woman’s top so I asked why as I was curious. I do hope this is alright with you 🙄

It just seemed strange as you were concerned about the relevance of the colour of the jumper! Me, I was just curious about why you were so concerned about it! Personally, I like colours and more description to allow me to picture the scene more accurately.

@m00rfarm Are you for real?

Your table wasn’t free but irrespective you we’re having it anyway

RUDE

I guess so. Anyway - can't stop now (as much fun as it is) off to play in a tennis tournament now :)

No you were being abit mad sorry. In restaurants on arrival you go to the staff who direct you to your table. You don’t prowl round the restaurant then plonk yourself down on a table of randoms who are still eating. Mortifying. Assume you don’t eat out much. Still you know for next time I guess.

We were viewing the menu when a manager in a pink top came over to the table and told us rudely that we shouldn't have asked the other guests to move (again - at no point did we do this), that another table had been reserved for us and we should have spoken to the staff - again none of this was indicated, and only the one table had our name on it!

OP, I voted YABU because I think you shouldn’t have plonked yourselves down to that family, but actually looking at the specific question posed I think YANBU. The restaurant was at least partly to blame for the mix up to begin with . So, it’s massively poor customer service for them to speak to you in a rude way for what they may feel is a blunder for your part in the fiasco. It’s not as if you verbally abused the other guests or shoved a staff member.

So YANBU for walking out, what did they expect would happen? Who’s spend money somewhere they’d just been told off in ? They should’ve just explained what happened and politely asked if next time you could wait.

No matter what personal opinions they had of you, it really wasn’t smart of the manager to act like that because it resulted in a loss of two sets of customers.

Yeah, I don't think this is real.

Meh - in pubs to me it’s perfectly reasonable and expected that you’ll find the table with your name and take a seat. If anything not kicking the others out until your party all arrived is imo polite. The venue stuffed up by either a) not moving your reservation when they gave your table to others or b) not having a clear wait to be seated and separation between entering and seating yourself.

I’d find another venue for groups in future. And perfectly reasonable to find someday else for your celebration given you aren’t going to enjoy eating there.

On reflection and in defence of OP, service is sometimes so atrocious in restaurants and staff either ignore you or are too harried dealing with other diners, that I imagine OP thought she was being helpful by sitting at her allocated table.

Good staff will greet customers soon after they come in. Sounds like that was sorely lacking here.

@Dita73 @m00rfarm

OP put in about pink top as she cut and pasted from her email to pub