Mumsnet posts which drive me mad

[Ilovecleaning]

Anyone hate these posts?

• really really really long posts
• long posts with NO paragraphs
• posts which start ‘ I have a friend, let’s call her Jane; her DH, let’s call him Sam… you can’t bloody well follow the post. Much easier just to say Friend and DH.

Any others? 😊

Where's @cyclingsam when you need him 😅

My biggest issue is when posters try to pick apart everything an OP says, ignoring what she/he is asking and focusing on some minor misgiving that was briefly mentioned for context. Meaning all people coming onto the thread, join in which leaves the OP with no helpful advice.

For example "DH wants us to go on to X for our holiday but I don't really want to for Y reason. For context, we have been to X before but normally go to Z every year which I prefer but DH wants to go to X again for a change of scenery. We do always enjoy going to X except once 27 years ago when we had a drunken argument there at 2am and I called him a twat! But otherwise we do have fun. However I prefer to go to Z for reason given above. Which holiday do you think we should choose?"

Posters respond with "YABU for calling him a twat 27 years ago" "He needs to get his Ducks in a row"

🤨

Yes.

Our the ones where posters can't appreciate or even imagine nuance.

No one's entire life can fit into one short post. But some posters are unable to make any inferences at all and take the post as the literal truth. No more and no less.

You just add a comment rather than hitting quote.

Users that do what I'm doing right now really frustrate me. I feel like it's a fairly new phenomenon - I've been on this site for years but only in the last few months I've really spotted users quoting the OP despite being 200+ comments in

This really jars. I can't understand why people do it of a DC when it really is not "outing" in any respect to tell us you're referring to your son or your daughter.

@Ilovecleaning the ones where they post the once and only once! never ever come back to answer a question!

I also hate "I have three friends: A, B and C. C doesn't talk to A & B..."

I wish they'd used DF1 to follow the convention of DD(number), which gives me a better chance at following the story.

I saw a user use "DCat" the other day which made it so much more easier for me to understand 🤣

Talking of which, there was a missing husband, one yesterday, when the bloke had been missing for an hour after going to get a takeaway, I know I posted on it, but I can’t find it and I can’t find a deletion message

The 1% who voted YABU when there is no YABU, someone obviously takes great delight in doing it. (That person probably put the glass next to the dishwasher).

I now try to avoid snobby threads, eg:

• Cruises are full of chavs.
• Centerparcs restaurants are all crap.
• My DC can’t possibly go to a state comprehensive as they’re too precious/clever.
• It’s so hard to get a well paid job unless DC goes to Oxbridge.

Also I don’t read any post without paragraphs, or the use of A,B,C, or made up names.

‘I’m pregnant suggest a name’ with no indications of what names the OP likes. Does google not work?

Or

I’m not pregnant or even TTC but here is a list of 50 names I like can you comment on them? No.

New to MN and it took me a whole month to realise I could just @ the OP or simply reply without either 🤣

I blame menopause brain…

and yet when offered advice always give xyz excuse about why they can’t possibly do that. And get irate and defensive afterwards. Can think of a couple in particular right now.

And then ask for the thread to be deleted because they don't like the home truths that have been posted.

Am I pregnant? Poster

I don't know did you do it right by standing on your head - what I want to say

How would we know?

When posters complain they’re struggling financially because once they’ve paid their huge mortgage on their huge house in London, the expense of having five cars, the increasing costs of their winter skiing holiday and summer vacation to St Bart’s, taken the school fees for their four children into consideration they’re only left with £5k disposable income for the month.

I really hate ones where the OP is clearly in an abusive relationship and has the temerity to make more than one thread on it (focusing on different situations, and often months apart) and some posters advance search them and start ranting at them for not taking their advice to leave immediately after the first thread. Or worse, start talking about them rather than to them eg 'don't waste your time on this one, she'll never listen, she's pathetic' etc etc.

I get that it's frustrating when it's obvious to an outsider that OP should just leave, but it's well known how hard it is to get out of an abusive situation, and maybe that OP doesn't have any real life support and just needs some reassurance as her head is being fucked by said abusive situation. If you don't want to answer, don't. And sometimes a level of tough love is needed. But don't basically scold a clearly struggling OP or mock them - how is that helping anyone?? I think some posters do forget that there is (usually!) a real person behind the screen.

And yes this is personal to me, albeit many years ago now in a relationship I am now long out of. Just made me feel completely worthless and took away the only 'safe space' I had to anonymously vent!

Sorry to everyone who has said that posts like the above are their main pet hate 😅. But please, just ignore and scroll on!

@QuestionableMouse

got a bit freaked out a while ago when I was PM'd

"You should return to your thread regarding the Archery and explain yourself."and then

"I am a member of Mumsnet and I have the right to demand you answer a pertinent question. I am responding to your post ffs! The developments on the thread THAT YOU STARTED demand your response!"

That's harassment. I hope you reported?

Unfortunately I think there's quite a thin line between being a concerned stranger who wants to support someone in difficulty and being a bored busybody who internalises other people's problems and turns them into their own personal soap opera.

There are people IRL like this as well: "friends" who take an unhealthy interest in other people's relationship dynamics and insert themselves into private situations when it's not required/not helpful or give "advice" when not sought after.

The internet massively amplifies this and people without enough to do day to day tend to be the worst culprits.

The “why do you care about this” replies to OPs. If you truly don’t care about the subject in question, but have nothing to add to the discussion, why bother posting at all, unless it’s to make the OP feel silly?

@saltinesandcoffeecups @Newsenmum there is never a reason to quote the original post. It clogs up the thread and irritates everyone.
Simply type @ and the OPs username will pop up if you feel the need to tag them.

It’s definitely to belittle the poster.

Are they Welsh?

"Shall I have another child?"

(Usually from women who have primary aged or under DC)

It drives me mad when people criticise the way the post was written. A case in point, a post was made recently, where the OP described the manager as wearing a pink jumper. (As it happened, that part of the post had been copied from an email that the OP had sent to the pub and the jumper colour was being used as an identifier). So someone HAD to say "why is it relevant that they were wearing a pink jumper". That was the sum total of their contribution to the thread.

(sorry) Actually, when I am just wanting to read the OP's posts to get to the end more quickly and not miss anything relevant, I prefer when they quote the posts to which they are responding, so I can continue to understand the gist of it.