Mumsnet posts which drive me mad

[Ilovecleaning]

Anyone hate these posts?

• really really really long posts
• long posts with NO paragraphs
• posts which start ‘ I have a friend, let’s call her Jane; her DH, let’s call him Sam… you can’t bloody well follow the post. Much easier just to say Friend and DH.

Any others? 😊

I hate posts that have the expression "need a handhold" added to it.
What are you, four?
You can ask for help if you need to but please save for yourself those childish expressions.

Ugh my ultimate pet peeve/cringe is when talking about sexual activities 'finish me off' or 'finish him off' 🤢 or even better 'arrived'.

Where can I move. Live in London and wfh. Budget 2 million.
Why not consult the countless other threads exactly like this that arise every day.
And why are the same bloody places mentioned like they are the only places nice m/c folk can live in…

Post Mother's Day l've got a new one - the Escalating Faux-Concurrance Humble Brag ...

OP - I don't need validation, it's all commercial manipulation.

First Poster - Quite right! A card, a hug and flowers will do me fine.

Second Poster - Very True! A simple breakfast in bed followed by a lovely walk and a pub lunch with hand-picked bouquets and cards from all my children, in-laws and grandchildren is quite enough for me.

Third Poster - Absolutely! I don't need a big fuss, just waking with a magnum of champagne and a choir of all available relatives within a thousand mile radius singing the praises of my generative fabulosity, followed by a parade, the Giving Of Gifts, a banquet, a spot of riual sacrifice, coco and bed. Nothing fancy at all. I feel sorry for all you high-maintanance mums out there, your lives must be so empty for the rest of the year!

See also Birthdays, Christmas etc ... And any thread about getting into a swank uni where posters are dying to trot out that their kids got eleventy billion A*s under the guise of advising the OP.

You do realise that some of us non-drivers have actually planned and prepared for such events hence the reason we are comfortable with our choices and don’t need to drive. My DH doesn’t drive me everywhere nor do I depend on him to do so. I can go without being in the car for months. The last time I was in the car was November. I am within walking distance to everything, shops, schools, doctors, dentists, restaurants etc.

If something happens to DH where he can’t drive or dies, I would still be able to manage as I always have before I met him.

Where I used to work, most of the staff took public transport or walked because there were few places to park and either they would have to spend ages looking for a spot or park in the park and ride and take a bus anyway.

We all age including our vision and reflexes and reaction times. There are already too many people on the road with such problems and I rather be one of those who doesn’t rely on a car than someone who does to the extent that they can’t manage without or they have such issues and knowingly still choose to drive, risking their lives and others.

I did find,when my mum began to need more support living at home with dementia, and after she went into a home,that being able to drive was a godsend. I could get to her quickly if need be, even in the small hours, and we didn’t need to choose a home based on accessibility by public transport.

Relying on someone else to drive you is very different to planning your life a certain way because you either can’t or don’t want to drive. As you say, you can’t rely on a husband or partner being around forever. However, I have neither - so I can’t rely on one to be my driver even now, and by definition, my driver can’t be taken away.

I don’t understand how you can say I don’t know where I might live or work. While I obviously don’t have a crystal ball, so can’t be sure I’ll never want to move house or change jobs, these things are within my control. It’s not like I’ll wake up one morning and discover I’ve been teleported to a small Cornish village. I will always choose where to move to or work based on my actual circumstances rather than hypothetical ones.

I worry more for people who choose to live in areas where driving is essential, with no thought to how they’ll get around if their health or eyesight stops them from driving. Things like where you live and work are in your control - your health isn’t.

I agree. So bloody soppy.

@HotChocolateNotCocoa

It’s not like I’ll wake up one morning and discover I’ve been teleported to a small Cornish village.

LOL 😂😂😂

Oh yes. Posters who think The North is: the end of the M1! There's a lot of space beyond Leeds etc!

I too get amazed that any sane person would ask a random group of strangers for financial, medica, legal advice, it's the equivalent of stopping people in the street!

You do realise that some of us non-drivers have actually planned and prepared for such events hence the reason we are comfortable with our choices and don’t need to drive.

I agree with you. When I lived in London I didn't need to drive. When I moved away I learned to drive. We wouldn't live where we do now if we didn't drive.

Although you do also get people who work in X industry or do have useful insight into whatever it is, who can sometimes point you in the right direction or make you aware of relevant stuff you would otherwise have no idea about. (You don’t know what you don’t know.) Obviously you do have to investigate any info provided further, away from the thread.

I’m always surprised by anyone who gives advice on here (assuming that they actually are a lawyer / actuary / doctor / accountant). It’s always drummed into us at work that we aren’t insured to give advice that we aren’t paid for. Although perhaps it is difficult to sue a mystery person on the internet.

I get cross with posts where someone claims that their child has got into multiple famous, expensive schools and they have no idea which to choose. Particularly at a time of year where pretty much no schools are making offers (like during the summer holidays).

So your son got into Eton, Harrow, Winchester, Westminster and St Paul’s? And you have absolutely no idea which one you like best? Even though he had to go through a mad process involving a pre test, a more involved exam set by the school, several interviews, a group activity and a tour of the school? It isn’t as though the finger of God points down and chooses the children at 10 or 11. Having absolutely no idea which to choose after going through all that is peculiar. Or, perhaps it’s made up nonsense.

Being within walking distance of everything in your 40s doesn't mean you will be in walking distance of them forever.

And just because your reflexes might deteriorate in 30 or 40 years' time, doesn't mean you need to worry about them now.

It remains unreasonable to suggest that driving a car is anything other than a useful life skill. Of course, you can survive without it, just as you can survive without being able to cook or read or swim or ride a bicycle.

Nowhere did I say it wasn’t a useful skill. I actually know how to drive but never had a license nor am I in my 40s. I haven’t been behind the wheel in about 20 years. I simply choose not to for various reasons.

And just because your reflexes might deteriorate in 30 or 40 years' time, doesn't mean you need to worry about them now.

The same could be said about being in the car with someone that gets ill behind the wheel.

Christ, people will argue about anything on mumsnet

Out of date opinions on London locations to live.
Typically non Londoner parents or aunts asking where their 20-something relative should live.
Cue loads of posts about suburban places miles out, and terror stories from years ago about now gentrified areas which are favourites of young people who want to be on good late night transport etc.
Driven extra mad by assertions that places ‘don’t feel safe’ when the only discernible difference in quality of life from the place they have recommended is that more black people live there. And they have only ever driven through.

This doesn’t make any sense. Why won’t people who don’t drive be in walking distance of things forever? Why would they actively move from a convenient location to somewhere where they can’t get around? You’re still making it sound like relocation is something that just happens spontaneously, with no input from the person actually doing the relocation.

And no one is saying “Don’t bother learning to drive in case your reflexes and eyesight deteriorate in later life”. But as I and other posters have pointed out, you can’t assume you will be able to drive forever - and that’s something you have far less control over than your location.

Has anyone mentioned posters who derail a thread with random bickering yet?

Or really unsubtle sarcasm?

OK one question.

If you are cutting a slice of bread, or buttering a slice of bread do you still use your left hand?

It does make sense.

You have no control over what amenities or public transport will exist near you in the future. You don't have total control about where you live ( you may suffer a big loss of income or a marriage break-up or a disability that means you have to leave your home).

But anyway, you don't have to become a slave to the car for driving to be a really useful skill. That's the point.