Mumsnet posts which drive me mad

[Ilovecleaning]

Anyone hate these posts?

• really really really long posts
• long posts with NO paragraphs
• posts which start ‘ I have a friend, let’s call her Jane; her DH, let’s call him Sam… you can’t bloody well follow the post. Much easier just to say Friend and DH.

Any others? 😊

I don’t read long posts after the first few sentences. They’d have to be really riveting for me to go any further.

I hate the posts about very minor domestic issues (usually connected to food or household chores) where the solution is simply to speak to your partner, family, etc.

And I HATE the prefix D to Husband, Partner, Friend.

No one in real life usually calls their H 'Darling Husband' .
It seems very pretentious and I don't know why posters continue to do it.

Especially when half of them are posting about absolutely bastard husbands!

I always thought it was my Dear Husband, Dear Daughter, etc!

It's either.

Oh, yes. It is always some self-pitying post, too, that derails the thread.

Example:

OP: I am not sleeping well and this is taking a toll on me. I've tried everything I can think - warm sleep, getting enough exercise, making sure my bedroom is well-ventilated and it's not working. Can anyone suggest something?

Poster 2: My mother died 11 years ago and I haven't had a decent night's sleep since. My partner is abusive and so this means that I have to bring up our six children (all of who have severe SEN) as a single parent. I'm on benefits and the estate we live on is dire. I never have a free moment to myself. I have to fight for everything I get from the NHS. And CAMHS is useless. I've gone to my GP multiple times but he refuses to prescribe me sleeping tablets. I'm at my wit's end.

Posters 3 - 28: Oh, that sounds awful, Poster 2. I know what you mean by the NHS. I've been on a waiting list for a hip replacement for 16 years now. The NHS is useless.

Posters 29 - 41: The NHS is not fit for purpose. {Insert complaint about their inability to get an appointment with their GP, waiting time for a scan, etc}.

Just seen another one that puzzles me..

When posters start with "I mean" before they've said anything that needs clarifying.

Argh. "warm sleep" should be "warm milk".

Oh and posts like the one I’ve just made. I’ve asked for recommendations for cute, girly cars. Why I want one is nobodies business, that’s what I’ve stipulated. And even asked for no judgement as I knew how it might go…

First responses were 🙄, sure, why do you want that, what grown woman calls a car cute, weird post…

Feel free to scroll on by!

Oh I do this, it's just a vocal tic. I'm Irish and I think a lot of Irish people probably do this. People write as they speak on MN rather than formally.

Ah, fair enough. I'll probably read them all with a nice Irish lilt now so 😄

Posters who state things like “I suspect we’re only getting one side of the story here” as if it’s incredibly insightful. It’s the case for literally every thread!

Yes, but what is the point when no one knows what you are agreeing with unless they scroll back several pages to find the poster’s name you have tagged?

This. And when an OP will mention a perfectly common behaviour in children and ask if their child must be autistic (despite zero other indicators) to which a dozen posters declare that their child has autism and does that so it must be autism, even though a thousand posters with non-autistic kids could also say that their kids do the same. Newsflash folks, autistic people are actually capable of some of the exact same behaviours as non-autistic ones.
And don't get me started on the whole 'I can never be bothered to tidy up' = 'you must have ADHD' ones. Whatever happened to just being sodding lazy / having more interesting things to do???
And please don't use DS for your sister or DP for your (single) parent. I don't want to have to spend time working that out. DSis, DM or DF work fine.
Oh and if you're going to post a really juicy OP then come back and update.

And the responses of 'I'd give anything to have my mother back for just 10 mins' when someone has said how utterly shite their mother is. Some people are different to you and have had different experiences - it's not rocket science!

That's why I don't use the app. I just use the browser on my phone.

I responded to your message on my phone just now.

I've said this a million times.
The only way to find out you've been thanked is via your notifications.

Oh definitely. I lost my mum very suddenly when I was a teenager but she wasn't perfect, I probably moaned about her and don't begrudge anyone that does the same about theirs!

Oh those sleep training threads!

Whenever you suggest sleep training as a solution to an OP whose baby wakes every hour, all night long, someone is bound to tell you that you're cruel and you're damaging the child for life.

Regardless of the fact that the OP is too tired to function any longer.

When people reply to the OP but ignore the fact there's 40 folk already replied

Like the thread just now about someone asking what to expect from their first Tesco delivery. 4 pages in people are still explaining the whole process despite it being explained in full in the first few replies

They also always know 'someone' who used cry it out until the baby was sick and, of course, the baby slept in their sick all night because they learned to just not cry. 🙄

On a similar note. "I worked in a nursery and I wouldn't send my child there". I don't get this. Why work somewhere if its so terrible? What was so awful about the care you provided? People always harp on about nurseries not providing 1:1 care and ignoring the fact if a baby has siblings it also won't be getting 1:1 care.

And anyone who refers to nurseries as "institutions" or "farming" children up also winds me up no end.

On a similar note. "I worked in a nursery and I wouldn't send my child there". I don't get this. Why work somewhere if its so terrible?

Thats reasonable if they left because they didn’t agree with their policies.

Fuck, yeah!

TBF when the OPs posts insist they acted like angels throughout but the other person had an irrational response/s to them (often with gaps in their narrative), and the interchange is highly unlikely, you do start to wonder. There's a post up like this at the moment.

OP's who don't get the response they were expecting, argue with posters and come back (usually) the next day with it all resolved in their favour and explain how they were right all along 'actually' and everyone IRL agrees with them.