So dh said, 'this is all part of coercive control, making me change my behaviour, I can't be myself'
Background is dh is a police officer, coincidentally he had a domestic violence training day a few weeks ago so I think that's where this has come from.
The situation: dh manages an adult football team, for years he'd bring the kits home to wash, I'd help put them out and pack them away, not a problem.
Then we had kids who are now 4 and 5. For the past few years I've been asking him not to bring them home because they take up so much room when drying. We have two airers that are normally drying our clothes, and I like to keep the landing banister free for towels and sheets. Dd 5 bedwets frequently so I do need this space. Also when he does bring them back and wash them he will literally leave them for days after they've dried before packing them away. It just really irritates me.
I jokingly reminded him this morning, we were just having a bit of banter and that was his reply above. I'm massively offended that he has basically called me abusive for asking not to use our house like a laundrette. I'm sitting here thinking what the fuck?
It's also not part of a bigger picture, he is obviously free to go where he wants and when and frequently does. I've also asked in the past to set up a rota with the team so everyone does it once or twice a season but he has never sorted it either.
So aibu?
Yabu- this is coercive control and he should be able to wash and dry 15 man sized shirts every week without issue
Yanbu - he's being unreasonable