School detention for forgetting a ruler?

[Wizardo]

Just interested - how many people have secondary school aged kids whose school gives a detention for forgetting basic equipment like a ruler?

I wonder does it really teach kids to be organised. Surely it just means disorganised people get lots of detentions? And feeds anxiety?

My schooling in the 90s felt pretty strict but this seems borderline bonkers. My dd currently “can’t borrow a school library book for the rest of the year” as she’s so anxious about getting a detention because she handed her last book in two weeks late. So now we are visiting our local library instead to provide her with books to read! I have obviously told her to just get the detention over and done with but she is adamant and determined to avoid it.

vote Yabu for No detention given
and Yanbu for Detention given.

But you’re describing a relevant and direct consequence for not following company rules. Not arbitrary punishment. Security didn’t also keep those people in detention. Yes eventually you will get fired as punishment but that’s a consequence of regular security breaches and really quite different to forgetting a ruler,pen, etc.

There are so many weird non-comparisons here. Can you really compare a 13 year old (for example) detention for forgetting a ruler, to a 35 year old banker forgetting to lock his laptop? Yes there are consequences for both, but they’re wildly different. And detention isn’t suitable for either!

It's ridiculous. Yes the new 'behaviour policy' dishes out a detention for first time forgotten equipment. And if they have 2 in a day it's a 'reflection room' where they are taken out of class and miss a days' teaching. So a kid forgets their pencil case and it's a day out of lessons.

It's creating a toxic stress filled environment that damages learning.

And then they bemoan high absence levels and mental health struggles 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Idiots.

My son is another one who had a black market going for stationary. He also bought a few extra planners at the start of each year, as weirdly, forgetting your planner got you a day in isolation -same as for telling a teacher to fuck off. The only thing the school achieved by the planner thing was making them very very tradable commodities!

And nonsense to disrupting class. This is stuff like no white socks for PE when the kid's wearing grey. They disrupt the class to have a go at the kid, dish out detention and then half the time have to deal with the kid being upset about it.

I have Zero respect for the school or tolerance for their nonsense. All it teaches is rules are dumb and teachers are mean.

Actually disrupting class or rude behaviour gets 3 chances before detention. It's a joke.

Why don't you teach your own kid yourself then?

@hamsterchump nah, happy to let teachers teach, it's what they trained for, the ones I know love teaching and I think are probably very good at it. I don't blame the teachers. I'm sure most are good. It's the school administration that I think are wrong headed. I pity the teachers fussing about sock colour and rulers (to underline the title, not in maths or anywhere it's important). I can't imagine any of them joined teaching for that or finds it rewarding.

I'm in this camp.

If I forget something basic (which a ruler is) when I go into the office, I go to the cupboard and get what I need. I don't get a bollocking.

My ds's high school used a points system, think they allowed 5 misdemeanours a year before detention.
Bless his form tutor who told them if they realised they'd forgotten something in form to let him know and he would loan them equipment for the day. God bless you Mr Coomer 🙂

Gosh if I had got a detention for every bit of equipment I forgot at school I would still be there 😅

Yes, but do 300 of your colleagues forget stuff every single day and expect the company to provide you again with something you just got given yesterday? Would your company be happy with having to constantly provide stuff?

I don't think comparing work and school supplies is the same thing really. Companies (generally) have loads of money to supply things, and employees might generally be at one desk all day , and stationery sits in a drawer/pen pot. and employees generally don't cart everything they need to 6 different desks each day and perhaps 15 each week, and be expected to take all the equipment home, use it there and bring it back again the next day.

Why do people keep equating forgetting something for work to forgetting something at secondary school?

There are about 1000 pupils in the average secondary school. If everyone keeps forgetting their stuff that's a hell of a big resource cupboard they'll need to keep stocked.

Just bring your bloody pencil case little Johnny - it's not that hard

People keep comparing work and school because the schools constantly bang on about "preparing for the children for the workplace" by making them sit in isolation for having the wrong socks or not wearing a tie.

They can't beat the kids with both school and work sticks, pick an approach.

I’m surprised because I’m a secondary teacher and the students barely have to bring anything. They look at me like I’m crazy when I ask where their pencil cases are or why they didn’t bring a pen.

If I gave detention for each one it wouldn’t be manageable.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to expect kids to have equipment that is needed. I think if a child repeatedly forgets stuff in a way that disrupts learning a detention is reasonable (though I'd say lunchtime or something first off).

But honestly my DDs school is ridiculous. An hour after school detention for any minor infraction, someone in DDs class got a detention on the last day of half term for wearing grey socks to PE not white. How is that appropriate or sensible?

20% of children are being abused.

So in that school of 1000 people thats 200 abused children. A fair few who of whom will be written off as "naughty", "disruptive" or "forgetful"

What would you forget if you were one of the 76 children being physically abused or the 75 children being sexually abused? Maybe you would be one of the 100 children suffering from multiple forms of abuse?

When you are being sexually assaulted in your home maybe it is that bloody hard to remember your pencil case the next day.

This is a thread full of people scoffing at children who have disabilities which make these things harder to remember. And pretending like every child comes from a safe, warm, well fed environment where stationery is in easy supply. Maybe the bolshy kids acting like its cool they dont have a pen are ashamed because they don't have the kind of parents who will buy them one, or they are too scared to ask.

Its easy to be judgemental when you are not the one in an abusive home environment.

Schools sound so Draconian these days. A detention for forgetting a pen or ruler, I would have been in detention every single day, I used to forget everything (and still do). I did however love school and learning, I engaged in my education and went everyday. If they had these rules in place I would have not gone to school and been a school refuser as I suffered terribly with anxiety and depression (this was 20 years ago).

If school and government want to improve attendance and school refusal then they really do need to review school policy. Life has changed, parents can't afford to keep buying equipment/uniform (and the children may feel embarrassed about it), they may have undiagnosed ND (getting any referral is 2 plus years), parents are stressed and work full time meaning they don't always have time to put in a system or check their kids have everything.

It's not the teachers fault, I have every admiration for teachers but school policy and underfunding is leading to these utterly ludicrous policies and toxic environments meaning kids are not engaging in their education. It's very sad.

I said essential piece of equipment. but you do you.

6% of secondary pupils are estimated to have suffered/be suffering abuse.

No-one is scoffing at children who have disabilities or suffer abuse or pretending that all children come from a warm, safe, well fed environment.

Some children may well be arriving at school unfed and unprepared. The school staff are pretty good at spotting this and I'm pretty sure they would not be petty about a ruler with a child under such circumstances.

All of this x 1000. Many people can only look through the lens of their own life and children's life - they cannot imagine that children come from utterly abusive backgrounds, have very poor mental health or suffer from ND.

Some comments on here make me so sad.

Then parents should decide which side of the fence they want to sit on.
Either back schools as places of learning and let teachers get on with it the funding needed.
Or Have it as a business with all of the protections that the workforce should get, not bringing essential equipment, swearing and assaulting members of staff will see the pupils and parents removed permanently from the premises.

My DS often gets detentions for forgetting equipment and further detentions for forgetting the original detention - he does have ADHD and has a very low attention span - that said he is trying hard but seriously I get annoyed about the number of detentions he gets - he last had a lunchtime detention for his phone going off in a lesson - yes I know it should have been on silent - he took it out of his bag to turn off (was a wrong number not that the matters but he wasn't using it/friend wasn't calling)

Slight double standard in that the school sends messages to children via Microsoft Teams during the school day when they are not allowed to use their phone telling them if a room changes fir a lesson or with general chat like come and hand your RS book in ....

@FrippEnos

Then parents should decide which side of the fence they want to sit on. Either back schools as places of learning and let teachers get on with it the funding needed

This is literally what (most) parents what. It's not parents funding the schools though is it.

The 20% figure comes from the ONS. It is for all children under 16 but I very much doubt that it drops suddenly the moment children start secondary school.

The report for the 6% figure literally states that there are gaps in the data and this is only the based on the abuse they know about

No-one is scoffing at children who have disabilities or suffer abuse or pretending that all children come from a warm, safe, well fed environment.

Some of the posts have literally done that

Some children may well be arriving at school unfed and unprepared. The school staff are pretty good at spotting this and I'm pretty sure they would not be petty about a ruler with a child under such circumstances

Were you an abused child? I was, in my experience you are wrong.

But it has been parents ignoring the pleas of teachers about how bad the situation is and has got.

The usual response to teachers saying how it is on here is either to bait them, bash them, tell them to stop whinging, say how lazy they are for going on strike or tell them to get a real job. Its not really worked that well has it.

Maybe parents could get behind the teachers and push for the government to actually do something.

I hadn't and still haven't read all replies before posting just now on my sons detentions but I have skimmed a few more

Trust me we try very very hard as parents to ensure he has tons of equipment - since his ADHD diagnoses ( mmm took 5 years + to get diagnosed and now still on waiting list for NHS to review for medication but that's another post entirely)my study drawers could stock WHS Smith with the amount of pens, pencils and rulers I have bought to stock him with and that's without my Amazon frequent purchase of compass and calculator ! We are trying different ways to help him but it is annoying that he gets a detention for every single thing whereas those vaping , starting fights etc are getting similar punishments - some of his teachers have never given him a detention and I'm supremely appreciative of their kindness and understanding

one of his teachers used to send him out of the room for his lack of focus and lack of equipment and then would then shouts at him in the corridor and complain when he hadn't done sufficient work