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AIBU?

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Original poster

My husband thinks breastfeeding women should be more classy

777 replies

marshmallowburn · 21/02/2024 12:22

He thinks if you are feeding, do not do it in the centre of a food court , try to go to the edges. Choose your seat around the fringe. Preferably near a potted plant. Choose to be discreet. Do not make a spectacle of yourself ( in Parliament),
In a restaurant, don't sit in the middle.
Women should show more discretion and decorum.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
11
Herewegoagain84 · 21/02/2024 21:32

BashfulClam · 21/02/2024 21:31

Why is your husband looking at other women’s tits?

Haha this. He seems a bit disgruntled that he can’t get a closer look. 👀

puzzledout · 21/02/2024 21:34

surreygirl1987 · 21/02/2024 21:22

Decorum is only ever used in relation to women ☹️

As is modesty.

Zone2NorthLondon · 21/02/2024 21:35

puzzledout · 21/02/2024 21:34

As is modesty.

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Agree. Terms of chastisement and control

BashfulClam · 21/02/2024 21:36

Herewegoagain84 · 21/02/2024 21:32

Haha this. He seems a bit disgruntled that he can’t get a closer look. 👀

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Yep if he wasn’t staring at women’s breasts he wouldn’t know what they were doing with them.

Chickenkeev · 21/02/2024 21:37

puzzledout · 21/02/2024 21:34

As is modesty.

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I hadn't really noticed those before. Both totally true.

hot2trotter · 21/02/2024 21:41

Who gives a toss what "your husband says".
He sounds like a prick.

Balhammom · 21/02/2024 21:46

Would these comments apply if a man got his penis out and went for a wee in public view? Summarising the comments posted above:

  1. it’s entirely natural
  2. only a pervert would look anyway
  3. you cant have an opinion on this unless you too have the relevant anatomy
PaperDoIIs · 21/02/2024 21:48

IDontOftenComment · 21/02/2024 20:06

Totally agree with you husband OP, can’t stand seeing a woman flashing her breast, breast feeding or not.

Where do you go that you see that many women "flashing" their breasts?

TheKeatingFive · 21/02/2024 21:48

Ah, so we've got to the bit of the discussion where we compare nourishing infants to taking a slash.

Wonderful 🙄

Flamme · 21/02/2024 21:50

porridgeisbae · 21/02/2024 16:43

I think it's fine to sit where you want but I don't see why more women don't put something over themselves or put the baby under their top or whatever.

The women who choose to flop a boob out in public without putting anything over it do seem like exhibitionists.

I don't see why people who are bothered by this don't just look away. What is so terrible about the sight of a baby feeding?

And why do people who are against feeding in public always talk in terms like "flopping a boob out"? It's like there's some sort of compulsion to coarsen and denigrate a perfectly normal, natural activity.

TheKeatingFive · 21/02/2024 21:54

And why do people who are against feeding in public always talk in terms like "flopping a boob out"? It's like there's some sort of compulsion to coarsen and denigrate a perfectly normal, natural activity.

The misogyny it betrays is terrible. Why talk about women's bodies like that?

SerafinasGoose · 21/02/2024 21:56

Balhammom · 21/02/2024 21:46

Would these comments apply if a man got his penis out and went for a wee in public view? Summarising the comments posted above:

  1. it’s entirely natural
  2. only a pervert would look anyway
  3. you cant have an opinion on this unless you too have the relevant anatomy

You're comparing public urination with the feeding of an infant? This is the bizarrest false equivalence I think I've come across on this site to date, and that's a tall order.

The first problem with that - quite aside from urination in public and flashing both being criminal offences - is that urine stinks, is unhygenic and is a serious health hazard whereas milk is sterile, clean, and isn't being sprayed everywhere, contaminating the surroundings for everyone else. Breastfeeding an infant imposes on no one.

Second, in case it actually needs pointing out, there is a vast difference between the immediate needs of a baby and male paraphilia. You're equating the two? Really?

If you seriously see no difference between the function of a bathroom and that of a dining room, or what is expected or appropriate conduct within each, then I hate to think what your home must be like.

Flamme · 21/02/2024 21:59

porridgeisbae · 21/02/2024 16:55

I do lol but if it's right in front of you you have to spend the whole time you're having your coffee with your head turned at a weird angle.

Just cover up, people.

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No, you don't. You can turn your seat, move to another seat, look at your companion, read a book or whatever.

It's not as if hurts anyone to catch the occasional brief glimpse of a breast anyway, does it?

Toooldforthis36 · 21/02/2024 22:00

What a prize he is….

PaperDoIIs · 21/02/2024 22:00

Balhammom · 21/02/2024 21:46

Would these comments apply if a man got his penis out and went for a wee in public view? Summarising the comments posted above:

  1. it’s entirely natural
  2. only a pervert would look anyway
  3. you cant have an opinion on this unless you too have the relevant anatomy

This is not the big gotcha you think it is. First of all, pissing in the street is not comparable to breastfeeding. Neither is a penis comparable to a breast.

That being said, if some bloke is pissing up a wall and in a bush, I look away (if I notice it to begin with) and that's that. Tbf you never see that much anyway unless they're pissed or doing it for other reasons.

PaperDoIIs · 21/02/2024 22:02

Also funny how the man gets his penis out while women are flopping, flapping , flipping ,whipping and throwing their breasts around.

SerafinasGoose · 21/02/2024 22:02

PaperDoIIs · 21/02/2024 22:02

Also funny how the man gets his penis out while women are flopping, flapping , flipping ,whipping and throwing their breasts around.

Women have really been sold a lemon by the patriarchy and sadly some have swallowed the lot: pith, pips and all.

Thankfully, a great many on this thread and elsewhere have better critical faculties.

ShamalaPamela · 21/02/2024 22:03

@Balhammom

Why is a man pissing in the street and a woman breastfeeding a baby linked in your head?

Chickenkeev · 21/02/2024 22:04

TheKeatingFive · 21/02/2024 21:48

Ah, so we've got to the bit of the discussion where we compare nourishing infants to taking a slash.

Wonderful 🙄

It was inevitable really.

Millie890 · 21/02/2024 22:05

Balhammom · 21/02/2024 21:46

Would these comments apply if a man got his penis out and went for a wee in public view? Summarising the comments posted above:

  1. it’s entirely natural
  2. only a pervert would look anyway
  3. you cant have an opinion on this unless you too have the relevant anatomy

No...because that would be unnecessary public indecency and not feeding a child which is essential. You daft bastard!

Thementalloadisreal · 21/02/2024 22:07

puzzledout · 21/02/2024 18:38

But women here are also showing the same breastfeeding shaming....

Awful

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Internalised misogyny

CheeseSandwichRiskAssessment · 21/02/2024 22:08

PaperDoIIs · 21/02/2024 22:02

Also funny how the man gets his penis out while women are flopping, flapping , flipping ,whipping and throwing their breasts around.

And flashing 🙄

Thementalloadisreal · 21/02/2024 22:11

TheKeatingFive · 21/02/2024 21:54

And why do people who are against feeding in public always talk in terms like "flopping a boob out"? It's like there's some sort of compulsion to coarsen and denigrate a perfectly normal, natural activity.

The misogyny it betrays is terrible. Why talk about women's bodies like that?

Completely this.

Flamme · 21/02/2024 22:14

DoraSpenlow · 21/02/2024 17:17

It's all very well telling people not to look but some performance breast feeding mums don't always make it easy.

I remember one occasion when we went into a cafe. It was very busy and we asked a couple sitting at a table for 4 if they minded us joining them. They said they were nearly finished anyway and so we sat opposite them. While we were waiting for our food the other couple left and before we could move to opposite each other a couple of mums with babies in arms came and sat opposite us. They got comfortable and then both of them got both breasts out and started to feed their babies. This meant that we either had to look at the ceiling, the table or to the extreme right or left. We had ordered and paid for our food and there was nowhere else to move to. It was very uncomfortable for both of us and we rushed our food and left. There were other mums there feeding their babies and you would be hard pressed to notice but these two were so out there with it all and we felt they were just waiting for one of us to look vaguely in the direction of their breasts so that they could say something. It was horrible so I totally get where the OPs husband was coming from.

So where would you have looked if they hadn't been feeding their babies? Would you really have been sitting there staring at them and their chest areas? Or would you just have carried on with your meals and chatting to each other quite normally?

pointythings · 21/02/2024 22:20

It's amazing how the 'discreet' brigade have all seen loads of these 'performative breastfeeders', but somehow the rest of us don't seem to come across them at all...