My husband thinks breastfeeding women should be more classy

[marshmallowburn]

He thinks if you are feeding, do not do it in the centre of a food court , try to go to the edges. Choose your seat around the fringe. Preferably near a potted plant. Choose to be discreet. Do not make a spectacle of yourself ( in Parliament),
In a restaurant, don't sit in the middle.
Women should show more discretion and decorum.

If I want to get my breasts out in the middle of the supermarket for a scratch, or just because I prefer being topless, I assume everyone here is okay with that?

Whats so intrinsically special about breastfeeding that I should be able to do it wherever I want without any decorum?

of course which is why I would never volunteer this opinion in real life unless someone specifically asked. This thread is the OP asking for our opinions on what her husband said. Should I have lied then and said I though he was an idiot. Does that not make the forum kind of pointless then

A keyboard warrior...... so brave!

Don't tho k the BF mother doesn't read your PO face, tight lipped attitude!

Hopefully they just laugh at you!

I am keen on modesty and respect in public places and for others around you so i am with your husband here.

And as grown adults they’ll know if they click on an AIBU there will be a variety of opinions. It’s amazing how many site users turn into clueless, doe eyed, impressionable sheep when it suits the person who dislikes what’s being posted.

@marshmallowburn how is he about women in power/in charge in general?
Is he decent and respectful in his opinion of them, or dismissive, disparaging and holds them at a lot higher standards?

Now you're being a real silly billy! It's half term you must have a project to do? A diary to write up?

What an odd goady sort of post.

I expect the correct response is to tell your partner that when he develops the capacity to breastfeed he will be entitled to choose where he does it?

Do you have views of your own OP?

You could get your tits out on the beach though? Or sunbathing in your garden?

Would that suffice?

of course I would not expect her to move mid way through. That would be silly.

I hate to tell you but everybody is judging everybody all the time. We all do it.

Would I come on here and give my views without being asked. No of course not. It wouldn't even cross my mind.

However this question asked what people thought. So people have given their private opinions. If you don't want to hear peoples thoughts then just don't read the thread.

I hate the threads slagging off dogs so I just don't read them because why upset myself. The posters are not going to change their opinion just because I don't like it.

This is the stupidest comment EVER!

I was on a bus in a town in Northern England in 1980 when my daughter needed a feed. I fed her. Unfortunately there were no pot plants available on buses in the 1980s, so I could not hide my shameful act. The bus stopped, the conductor (a woman) walked up to me and said “there are toilets for that sort of thing.” I thought it was hilarious and just laughed, a few older women told her what they thought of her attitude and the bus went on its way.
i wrote to the bus company and got an apology.
Later that year in the same year, when I was walking through a churchyard in the same town with the buggy containing my daughter, a man was kind enough to show us his penis.
People are talking here as if the sight of a penis (shown with intent to shock and humiliate) is somehow equivalent to the sight of a baby being fed by a breast. There is NO equivalence. The fact this is even a subject for discussion in 2024 makes me sad, tired and ashamed of the society we live in.
As for modesty and older women, my mother, my granny and all other women in our family dating back as far as I know, to the early 1900s, have always breast fed their babies when they needed feeding. We are a perfectly respectable family.

I have yet to see a woman topless or with her breasts out when breast feeding. Even if it was, the baby covers most of it.

And as grown adults they’ll know if they click on an AIBU there will be a variety of opinions.

Opinions that can impact breastfeeding rates when expressed publically. So of course, say what you like. But it has implications

I’d rather see a woman breastfeeding without any ‘decorum’ than read your husbands pathetic opinions any day of the week

Sadly your husband's view is the prevalent one in society in this country.

I breastfed and fully agree with being able to feed baby wherever, whenever. I bought bf friendly layered tops which were incredibly discreet. You would hardly have known my son was feeding.

Brother in law still fell out with me when I refused to go upstairs to feed and so I left early.

On good terms now but he'll always be a twat in my (private) view.

What's really interesting is the faux concern for women's wellbeing by claiming it's a sacred and private moment. It's just another kind of fetishisation of something that's actually completely everyday. Those who claim to see it as so sacred and needs to be respected just use that as another, slightly subtler, way of making women feel self-conscious.

What's immodest about breastfeeding? Why are you looking?

What specifically do you find so offensive about breastfeeding?

You will also note that I have said several times that I agree with breastfeeding, that I think mothers should do it.

You should think about the wider implications of saying everything you've said on here. If you truly want to be supportive of breastfeeding, how would your comments on this thread help encourage mothers who are struggling?

I don't know what a keyboard warrior is.

The OP asked for our opinions. I gave mine. Same as everybody else did.

No idea what a PO face is.

I seriously doubt the breastfeeding mother even notices me never mind what my face is doing ( and I doubt my face is doing anything as I have lots more other things to think about. Any thoughts on a breastfeeding mother would be fleeting and gone in a second).

@MrBenschangingroom but you've admitted you'd judge that woman, and people can read your awful body language!

BF mothers will feel your disdain, you should be totally ashamed and get help so change your attitude.

Honestly, I find your attitude really awful, hence my anger towards you! I would never feel anger towards a breastfeeding mother, or think it's not "modest" it's just such a horrible attitude.

I'm not bothering with answering you anymore, I find your attitude disgusting and disgraceful! I can't imagine why you'd ever judge something so good for baby and mother.

Deal with your inhibitions and feelings that women should be modest.

For the 'modesty' brigade, there is nothing and nobody preventing you in that. Go on ahead.

For those advocating discretion, let's take that to its logical conclusion.

If the woman really cannot be as 'discrete' as you'd like her to be, then what? No feeding in public? Or what?

Sadly your husband's view is the prevalent one in society in this country.

I really don't think it is, thankfully, at least not in London. I've fed nearly 3 years altogether and counting... I can count only about 3 incidents where I got a funny look and I must have breastfed in public 500+ times

Your husband is a twat, but what an old thread for you to post...?

Breastfeeding is appropriate anywhere you would eat or another baby have their bottle.