My husband thinks breastfeeding women should be more classy

[marshmallowburn]

He thinks if you are feeding, do not do it in the centre of a food court , try to go to the edges. Choose your seat around the fringe. Preferably near a potted plant. Choose to be discreet. Do not make a spectacle of yourself ( in Parliament),
In a restaurant, don't sit in the middle.
Women should show more discretion and decorum.

Yes I understand which is why we have different opinions on the subject. Both are valid.

That's insane tbh. Do you get offended by restaurants in general? What in particular offends you about babies/breasts? Do you have have breasts yourself? Is eating 'private to you'? Is there any logic at all to what you're saying?

It really depends. I wouldnt go out of my way to avoid everyone, but some women love to make a spectacle of it. I was at a wedding recently and a woman at the next table just went completely topless and stated feeding there at the table when food was being served. The chairs didnt even have an armrest and it didnt look comfortable for her at all. There was a sofa placed in a quiet corner in the dining room and i was just really wondering why she didnt just go there.
An elderly woman told her about the sofa, probably thinking that she didn’t know and she stood up with her breasts out causing a huge scene berating the poor woman.
She was literally doing to get attention.

I don’t care what your husband thinks :)

its only valid if you’re the one feeding the baby

@MrBenschangingroom I think you're repressed not modest.....

Your attitude is really quite shocking!

I'd be exploring your reasons for thinking feeding a child should be hidden

Upbringing?

Bad relationship with men?

Something is really not right.

Your feelings are your own, but to voice them so openly is shocking. I'm seriously hoping you've not passed this on to your children.

Yes yes but even you know this is extremely odd behaviour and not in any way representative of breastfeeding women. One crazy loon is not really very relevant when discussing breastfeeding in public anymore than any crazy loon is in any discussion

My turn came and I suggested they go first as I was feeding my infant. Neither the couple with their 2-year-old nor the photographer and assistant knew I was breastfeeding. There is a way to be classy.

And that's wonderful for you

Other women may have more challenges, around latching, side, speed or let down, over/under supply.

Given it may not be possible for them to be as 'classy' as you - what is the conclusion? They shouldn't feed in public because they don't meet your standards? They should be judged and rightly so? I'm keen to know

Apologies if posted already but nails it.

Can I just ask in all seriousness why the women on this thread are so angry.

I mean I have said I would not say anything or behave in any manner that would make the mother feel uncomfortable. She would not even notice me.

Yet my opinion is making you all absolutely furious? Why? You are basically saying nobody is allowed to disagree with you.
Babies are lovely. Breastfeeding is natural. Others are allowed to wish you were discrete.

try to go to the edges

why the edges? Lots of people walking past ordering food and moving back through to the center - surely here a woman or any customer is more likely to get bodged or knocked by people moving past. The center there would logically be less people moving past and more secure for not getting knocked about whilst feeding.

Or isn't it a safety aspect your dh is concerning himself about?

@Whatevershallidowithmylife its not a special part of bonding. Its just normally feeding a baby.

Yet my opinion is making you all absolutely furious? Why? You are basically saying nobody is allowed to disagree with you.

There will be women on here establishing breast feeding, trying to pluck up the courage to feed in public, trying to keep going when it's hard and they're worried about all kinds of stuff, including how people perceive them.

The things you're saying will make them self conscious and shame them. They'll wonder how many women like you are silently judging them.

That's why I'm picking you up on it.

Keep your poxy ridiculous 'wishes' to yourself. You can have your opinion of course, but everyone is entitled to disagree with it

He'd probably like to get fucked - but I doubt its satisfactory due to his hang up about tits and woman's bodies

Not hidden. Just pick a quiet corner if one is available.

I'm amazed at the amount of insults I am getting simply for having another opinion.

Plenty of other people on this thread have said they prefer discretion too.

Are we all wrong then. Should we ask you what our opinions should be so you can give it to us. Does that not make you controlling somewhat.

Brilliant, thanks x

@porridgeisbae ”put the baby under your top or something” … why? It doesn’t seem a good idea to risk suffocating your own baby. Police CouId get involved.

Your husband should keep his eyes to himself or stay indoors

@MrBenschangingroom It may be an age thing. Older women grew up in a different time where modesty was more a thing.
What are you on about?

You are judging breastfeeding women saying it's private, it's not, it's up to the individual woman.

You're saying women can't ogle? They can and women find other women attractive.

You're saying in your day "modest" wasn't a bad word, it is, it's oppressive.

You've voiced all this nonsense on a forum aimed at mothers and women and wonder why people are angry.

Women like you make other women doubt they're right to get their boobs out and feed their baby, make them consider if they are allowed to wear shorts a crop top, make them think they have to wear a "smock" of they're pregnant, like they should hide they've had sex and are now happily carrying a child, like it should be hidden.

That's why you're getting angry response!

Your view is awful, oppressive and not really suitable for a forum like this.

Does that help?

Of course people can disagree with me.

That's my point.

Why are they so angry because I have a different opinion to them?

I disagree with them but am not angry and insulting them.

@MrBenschangingroom plenty of people have not agreed with you, sone have! The vast minority!

Thank fuck!!!

I agree with this. I have a friend who was exactly that way wanting to be the center of attention hoping someone would make a comment so she could stand up and yell about her dare people look or comment. If no one did she'd be sure to walk around the room top less till she got a reaction. Breastfeeding is natural but some want to make it a see I am being persecuted for feeding my child!

@MrBenschangingroom you're totally insufferable and insulting can you not see that?