My husband thinks breastfeeding women should be more classy

[marshmallowburn]

He thinks if you are feeding, do not do it in the centre of a food court , try to go to the edges. Choose your seat around the fringe. Preferably near a potted plant. Choose to be discreet. Do not make a spectacle of yourself ( in Parliament),
In a restaurant, don't sit in the middle.
Women should show more discretion and decorum.

Do you feel the same about bottle feeding?

It's pretty weird to feel nauseous about it isn't it?

I keep seeing posts on twitter(x) etc asking why women don't seem to want kids any more.

Crap like this is part of the problem

My favourite opinions from men, are about breastfeeding and Labour.
It's not their body, and none of their blood business and they should be told as such.

Why did you marry such a man OP?

Have you told him how unclassified and lacking of decorum it is for him to be making judgements and trying to sway women into making decisions with his views in mind, that really do not matter?

I hope that women around him tell him where to shove his opinions.

He sounds like an absolute knob.

I think he should probably be more discrete about his existence and should sit in the fringes behind a pot plant anywhere he goes.

Does he hide in corners behind potted plants to eat his meals? Then why should a baby

I'm female so I wouldn't be 'ogling' as you put it.

I also would never say anything as I understand that others feel differently and I wouldn't want a mother and baby to feel uncomfortable. Live and let live and all that.
However this is how I feel.

I also don't agree with women having their pregnant bellies on show or one night stands. It's okay if you don't agree with me. However the OP's husband has got an opinion and he is being slated for it. I was just saying that others would prefer some discretion too. I realise it may not always be possible or things can go 'wrong' and like I say I would never, ever say anything but I would still have the same opinion.

It may be an age thing. Older women grew up in a different time where modesty was more a thing.
I can understand how the OP's husband feels though. If he accidently looks at the baby and catches sight of part breast he'll be getting branded a pervert. I mean look how outraged you are at me.

That’s more performative than a woman nursing her child.

Nursing women can’t win.

We nurse without a cover it’s a problem
despite it making it glaringly obvious we’re nursing and not particularly great when it’s warm, making baby hot and uncomfortable. Many older babies grab it and pull it out of the way because of it and some want to see their mum, not be looking up at a blanket.

We have a cover and some people have an issue with that.

It sounds quite immature that grown adults can’t avert their eyes if it makes them that uncomfortable and they rather make a woman and baby uncomfortable out of their own laziness.

There’s a lot of things that people do that I rather them not in public (men constantly adjusting themselves as if they’re making sure their parts are still there) but I do like most mature people, advert my eyes.

I can say I’ve seen maybe two women in my life where they have pulled out their breast in public and nursed, but these women had very large breasts so think it’s a bit harder for them to do so as discreet as some would like them to.

Your husband needs to stop staring at other women's tits.

My ex used to give me his thoughts on breastfeeding and how I was failing to do it correctly. He stopped when my older daughter asked him if the reason he was such an expert was because he had bigger boobs than me.

How old is your DH?

I have noticed that some men hit their mid 50s and suddenly go from being relatively normal to being right wing, self important, boring, belittling twats. Might be something hormonal but it needs nipping in the bud unless you want it to get steadily worse for the rest of your life together. Perhaps insist on him eating his dinner in the far corner of the bathroom behind a pot plant, see how he likes it.

Women can 'ogle' too you know? Ogling is not something that should be associated with breastfeeding.

It may be an age thing. Older women grew up in a different time where modesty was more a thing.

How old are we talking here? My grandmother would have been 113 and gave zero fucks about how any woman chose to breastfeed. My older living relatives, in their 70s and 80s, also couldn’t care less.

How old are you if you don't mind me asking OP? You both sound very different and yes he sounds stuffy and sexist!

Yes I think a bit of discretion is choosing a seat in a corner with plants and turning your back to the crowd. I mean it does not cost the mother anything to choose this seat if it is available and surely it also gives the baby more peace and quiet away from others to help it relax.

I mean why would a breastfeeding mother want to be in the centre of everyone coming and going. Surely it is noisy and distracting and makes the mum feel more exposed and vunerable.

I understand not everyone agrees with me but this is my opinion.

I would not say anything to any mother feeding her baby as I understand discretion is not always possible or the mother may not care about that. I would however likely leave/move as soon as I could without drawing attention to myself or offending her.

I don't want to sit beside noisy kids either or blaring music or loud people. That's just me though. I like quiet and private as far as possible.

Older women grew up in a different time where modesty was more a thing.

From the pictures I’ve seen of the 1940s, women nurse their children with the same “modesty” that those women did.

I appreciate your particular preference, but why is 'discretion' necessary? Breastfeeding mothers are not whipping their boobs out willy nilly and flinging them about. If people are gawking at them, that's very much their problem and they can stop.

😂😂😂

I think your husband should be more classy and less of a misogynist twat who obviously thinks boobs are for the male gaze, as opposed to actually keeping tiny humans alive. You’ve got a prize there OP!

Yes I think a bit of discretion is choosing a seat in a corner with plants and turning your back to the crowd
I think anyone turning to face the wall so their back is facing out would look very odd and far more noticeable than someone just getting on with feeding normally.

This 1000%

Breastfeeding is most natural thing in the world.

Nah. I sunbathed topless in the 80’s and breastfeed when I liked in the 2000’s. If he thinks breasts have one role you are wrong. Clearly. How can it actually be indiscreet to feed your child?

And I agree with you. Modesty these days is a dirty word sadly.

Raging OP, raging. Send him back to 1950, misogynistic arse.

I absolutely agree with him, it isn’t difficult to show some discretion