To think there's an off/bad vibe out there?

[ARichSeamToMine]

Does the world feel "off"?
Sorry if this seems ranty, I'm really interested in the vote though.

I'm feeling like there's a weird vibe out there.

I live in London, meet a lot of people through work and am not just judging by my circle.

I've been struggling to articulate this.

I'm late 40s and have seen recessions etc before.

Was out in the City tonight and I would say bar and restaurant were busy for a Monday night, so good there. The street I was on had several completely closed offices, pubs and two gyms, which was sad.

I understand that changes in social habits have been affected by working patterns etc.

I just feel there is something else at play

I increasingly find that people are a bit...strange? We saw groups in the bar, who presumably went out together from choice, just gazing at their phones. I was never anti tech but I'm starting to wonder if there is something in the idea that it affects communication skills.

my friend is worried about her dad because he constantly watches videos of fights - this is a TV show in the US now I hear.

I know a lot of people in my age group feel very "meh" and have little enthusiasm for things, but it's not just middle age. I don't think so anyway.

I'm happy if people are happy, but starting to wonder if they are happy. I meet a lot of people who don't want to go out, are up at 5am walking a dog, they take care of themselves with a good diet, often vegan, don't drink alcohol.

I'm not saying any of these things are bad. I can see if the City is reasonably busy on a Monday night, hospitality must be recovering, which is great.

But something out in the world feels off...like people aren't interested in much.

My online creative writing group has almost no posts. The tutor is regularly cancelling workshops and looking to do online only.

I'm in touch with a couple of exes and we are staying friends but they seem to do nothing but gaming. One in particular has no friends and is not bothered.

I might get flamed but I do wonder if men are particularly prone to doing less stuff if they are single.

Again, that is fine if they are happy. But I get this sense that people aren't happy.

Social anxiety seems very much on the rise.

Just curious to know if others get this vibe.

YABU - people are fine and just living life as usual

YANBU - people are losing communication skills and becoming unhappy

If I had been offered the option of home working at 18 I'd have jumped at the chance. I was extremely socially awkward (still am in fact) and was very socially anxious generally.
But getting out and about and meeting people and learning the world helped me so so much. I honestly think if I'd have had home working only I'd have become more and more isolated. Even now I have to be careful not to withdraw from people too much. But at 40+ I'm aware of what I need to do to keep myself social enough.

I guess we're discussing it because it's affecting people all over the world.

Good stuff such as? I had a nice cup of coffee this morning then did some gardening. I suppose that's good on a micro level, but it has no effect on the world and doesn't feature in other people's reality.

I'm genuinely glad that you're doing ok and have a positive outlook. I truly am.

However, the issues being discussed here are directly impacting people negatively and sometimes discussion helps people to process and address those issues.

Please could you give some examples of the positive things we could celebrate?

It was in Wales

I wouldn’t disagree with you, there does seem a negative current in lots of places. It’s not universal though. I have two jobs one public sector and it’s a very mixed bag and the other a high end tourism thing in a lovely location and everyone is always full of positivity. It’s lovely perhaps because there is no mobile phone signal🤔

Yet others on here think London has recovered is wonderful, vibrant and doing so well.

yes I agree

I do think it's a UK disease

I think our social contract has broken down. We have seen government/leadership that is utterly self-serving and has made its friends wealthier through corruption (covid contracts/shit in the sea/rivers) with no consequences at all. The idea we were “all in it together” while fucking and partying in Whitehall. Our leaders have showed us that to win, you have to lie, steal and just enjoy yourselves.

I can’t think of anything that this government has achieved to model community cohesion. So it’s no surprising the electorate are following suit.

Possibly this yes

I think a lot of people are struggling. World falling apart. Media showcasing all of this in bright colours right into your home. COL is impacting everyone, even council tax set to rise by 5%. What's the point? The time where you could work and as you got older start to reap the higher wages has dissipated. The world is really only set up to feed the top 1%. We are mere cogs to enable their comfort.

I went out for lunch with a friend a few weeks ago and the waitress said it was nice to see people engaging with each other instead of sitting in silence looking at their phones.

We are mid 50s so unsure of it's a generational thing or the fact being friends for over 40 years we enjoy each other's company.

Friend and I both retired go out for lunch every couple of months. Four hours of chatter and laughter. Not a mobile in sight. Since covid she's too scared to drive so I chauffeur her

It did seem to go on much longer in Wales - I've seen people insisting whole year groups were not being sent home when my kids were still having to deal with that.

I'd have said last year was first "normal" school year they had since covid- with trips back and masks and one way systems and windows being closed in winter.

Having said that I don't think my kids were badly impacted - we spent a lot of energy trying to ensure they were as minimal impacted as possible.

Cost of living crisis - that did impact them - our diet is poorer first thing we had to cut back on - last years winter was very cold and slightly damp in house - days out got a lot less - things have improved since then with DH changing jobs - pay increase has made everything more manageable and frankly happier DH there were issues in his last workplace but covid made them worse.

Young people scare me they share dick pics, girls their bits. For god's sake just say no girls.

They're up against impossible porn sex. Again say no girls.

My granny was right, keep your coat on.

The old saying that once men get beyond the laughter line their laughing still holds true.

I really think it’s a political
thing. We are being ruled by a party that does not care about others. It is quite apparent when cuts to services like mental health for children! are not seen as important enough to fund and when members of your party think that homeless people should not be allowed tents, among many other things.

Totally this, feel the same re Whatsapp groups too.

In Wales our wages are lower but our council tax up 20% in two years. Our energy up too. Yes we have beaches, mountains which are free. I priced a two hour visit to santa etc at a local farm. 2022 Five grandchildren, two mummies and me. £290. That's £100 more than 2019. I said sorry to mums but I'd rather spend that money on my grandchildren for whatever they needed. £60 each.

I don’t think it’s that at all, I know people round the world who feel the same irrespective of the colour of their government

I seem to remember there being a buzz when Blair got in - though I think there was an underlying economic upturn about same time as well.

I'm not convinced they'll be the same when this Tory government finally limps off - I hope I'm wrong.

Lunchtime around here is busy with retired, non working people in restaurants. At night the same places are closed half the week.

Our council tax not been that bad - but they've cut everything to the bone.

We have smaller than average bins and 3 week collections - it's a constant stress.

Covid stopped a nearish stream train trip for us - price it up afterwards - whole thing was about £150 more - was for a large group but we couldn't afford it.

I’m late 50s and there is a definite change in personalities going on.
Ive watched things change
I don’t think it’s healthy
More people are isolating themselves and their mental health is suffering ( you don’t even have to leave the house to shop these days for example )
More people feel entitled and self centred. I think this is due to social media.

Its getting worse. Many now don’t know life without social media and a phone in their hand.
I don’t think lockdown is the reason this goes back a long time before 2020.

Economy is in recession, super rich getting richer as standard of living for middle class and low income dropping. People under 40 will struggle in parts of the country to ever buy a home. Renting rights poor so insecure housing. War in Ukraine, war in Gaza, just coming out of covid pandemic (which hasn’t gone away completely, long covid too). It’s a bad time.

I sort of see where you're coming from, but I don't think people only did what was forced during the pandemic. The lockdown rules weren't really policed, they wouldn't have had the resources. It relied on most people complying without being forced.

After a while what it DID start to do was raise questions about how much people should have to give up or suffer for others, and for how long. Some people's circumstances meant they had to cope with unspeakable horrors or deprivation of the ability to meet basic needs for long periods. That kind of thing leaves a trauma type response and a fierce desire to never let anyone do that to them again. To some it may seem selfish, but only to those who didn't go through that experience.

There was also a nice, in-it-together type vibe but only at the start. As it dragged on people seemed to become more insular. But it was a very weird situation - hugely contradictory, really - being told to stay away from each other and not be social, yet being told this was the community minded thing to do. Caring about your fellow humans goes hand-in-hand with being sociable, spending time with each other. If people are forced to retreat and hide from each other, it seems unsurprising that they start to care less about each other.