Social media makes valentines awful

[OrangeeeSmarties]

DP and I never celebrate it massively. We get each other a card, small present or do something tiny. My DP has never been one for huge gestures or flowers, instead he shows me every day in so many little ways that he loves me and notices me.

Yesterday we simply went for fish and chips on the seaside. It was so lovely and simple and it was perfectly fine with me.

Then I go on instagram. Everyone I know posting a couple picture. Red roses everywhere, girls I know taking videos of their kitchen covered in candles and photo frames and a dinner plate with a red rose on it.

I now somehow feel like shit?

I know SM isn’t real but I can’t help but feel like, was I supposed to get that? Is that what DP was supposed to do? Were we supposed to post each other on our stories (we didn’t)??

I hate it!!!

Stop it, your an adult you should realise by now social media isn't real. Your day was far better than fake photos and videos, for all you know they bought flowers themselves. If you're happy and secure in your relationship you don't need to post it on sm, never compare yourself or relationship with a few staged photos.

Do you want DH to do those things? Would you want him to do it even if not posted on social media? Because if not, honestly, delete social media!! Things done just to post turn your relationship into a prop, completely devoid of meaning.

I hate valentine's day. I don't celebrate it, me and DP don't even say happy valentine's to each other, let alone cover the kitchen in roses. I'm so sure and comfortable in this decision that I don't care at all about seeing what others do. I see it and am glad it's not happening to me (while being happy my friends are getting what they want). If you're feeling shit about something you enjoyed you should ask yourself why.

What I was going to post

People post that stuff because of insecurity and to try to prove that they’re doing everything ‘right’. Did you have a lovely time? Yes. Keep that lovely feeling inside and remember if whenever you start comparing your life to social media.

I spent it alone. Got a valentines meal for two which I'll eat over two nights. Single.

Doesn't make me sad seeing the posts.

This is one of my favourite quotes & I often need to remind myself of it

For what it's worth your chips at the seaside sounds right up my street, I hate OTT displays for likes & content

You said you enjoyed your day but then felt bad seeing pictures of what other people did?

You lack empathy if you are unable to grasp the effect of SM on different people, with different tendencies and personality types to your own. We do not "all know" that SM is rubbish, some people will have the FOMO and can't tear themselves away,

i consider myself reasonably balanced but I took myself off all SM that was available at the time (Facebook, Twitter) to separate myself from the negative behaviours of people who were doing my head in. It was that bad.

Some people are unable to just walk away, they may not be emotionally strong, their friendships circles may centre on SM or they have their own individual motivators.

Just imagine the reality though eg them spending all that time setting everything up just for photos, arranging the plates, flowers etc for an instagram post. Imagine having to take photos of it all rather than it actually being a romantic moment. I can't think of anything less appealing. Your evening sounds genuine, shows real love/care, it was for you two not for Instagram.

DP got me flowers, card and a bottle of whisky I wanted. I bought gorgeous, very expensive steak and champagne and got him a card. We had a beautiful dinner I cooked, we did the dishes, then we snuggled up watching a good film and shared the champers. We then went to bed, cuddled and fell asleep in each others arms.
Did I put it on FB?! Did I fuck. Because these posts aren't for the person you love, they are performative and aimed at the people you don't really know.

💓

@daisychain01 everyone who access's social media should avail themselves of the facts surrounding it. Ridiculous to say that people don't know, as you've said they should take themselves off like you did!