Nearly 11 year old obsessed with skin care

[Oakstreet]

Getting on my nerves. As far as kids goes she isn't always on social media but all I hear is my friends have it! Fed up. Her dad ended up buying her some, so expensive too, she doesn't need it. I've tried telling her that it is a money spinning scam, and kids her age don't need it. She just doesn't listen, she really is like a stubborn teenager, but still a very a young child who shouldn't even be interested in this stuff. Anyone advice on how to talk to her?

My 10 yr old niece is the same, wanted expensive skin products for Christmas. There's nothing wrong with her skin! It's definitely from watching influencers on social media

She said ‘you're never too young to start a good skincare routine"

There are people on this thread, parroting this crap 🙄

She shouldn't be on social media at all at that age. There are age limits and tbh they should be higher than they are.

Your DD is being conned. Sold snake-oil that is actually bad for her. And she is too young to realise it so you need to cut off the source and stop her going on social media until she is much older and can spot grifters.

That said, many adults can't spot grifters either. That's why there are so many of them making money out of people.

But it's ok for 10 y/o to be on youtube?

No way. Can you show me where I said that?

Yep. My rule of thumb with skincare is - if your skin's basically fine, you don't need to be doing anything much. I'm lucky - mine's fine - and all I've ever really done is wash it with cheap, gentle stuff, and moisturise after (with very cheap, unscented stuff). I wear sunscreen in the summer to help prevent ageing. That's it. Takes less than a minute a day. There was never any reason for me to "get into a routine". Had the usual slight spottiness as a teen but nothing major.

On the other hand, my cousin has always had issues, including acne and subsequent scarring, so she does all sorts of things - special products and treatments, occasional visits to a dermatologist abroad. She has a reason to "get into a routine" and she doesn't need a TikTok video to tell her that.

Sorry, it was a pp. But i'm a bit shocked at the dramatics about skincare, while talking about youtube at that age. End of the day, they're young enough to just say no to them. I don't think it's wrong, within reason. (Age wise, and product wise)

Yep. My 21-year-old son seems to have quite resistant acne at the moment. When he comes back from university, I will be talking to him about skincare and maybe getting some advice. But my 18-year-old daughter with her perfect skin does not need any skincare routine other than sunscreen.

To be entirely fair, I was 11-12 in 2000-2001 and there was no Youtube or TikTok and I can promise you I was also obsessed with skincare, thanks to magazines. The fear of acne was instilled well before acne made an appearance. I had a box full of samples out of fashion magazines and did face masks all the time. Definitely not saying it’s a good thing though, but it’s not that new.

I have a vague relative who's a wannabe influencer. According to her our Christmas list should be full of expensive skincare stuff "because who doesn't love skincare products"

She then shows us her Saturday night skincare routine which consists of lining up about 20 bottles and plastering her face with the contents. Without makeup her face is red and shiny so it's obviously not working yet she's urging her followers to buy all this muck.

My granny used to say - No one gets rich if you’re happy with yourself. These influencers aren’t interested in the welfare of your child. They are interested in making money.

Stop letting her on social media fml

The cover-up make-up will be the next thing she'll be telling her followers to buy! The total cognitive dissonance 🤣

See I really feel for those with acne as this further promotes the 'your fault' message.

My poor sister suffered terribly and tried everything, including two courses of roaccutane. The only thing that truly cleared it up was pregnancy as it was so hormonal.

No amount of lathering this stuff on at 11 would have helped. Indeed it first presented as eczema so it would have made it worse.

For those not blessed with clear skin - beyond ordinary teenage blemishes - this is really sad. Not to mention all the total waste for everyone else.

Well, your husband already bought her it so, more difficult now to go back on that. I always explain my kids the reason for saying no twice at most. After that when they keep asking I just say no, when they ask why I just say "look, I already have you the reasons twice, and my position remains the same". Your daughter presumably doesn't have the funds to buy it so just don't buy it yourself.

She isn’t too young for the right skincare. Rather than telling her no get her what she can use responsibly.

But you do have a routine. You clean your skin, moisterise it, and apply sunscreen. And you do this consistently. That's a routine. And a good one. It's what I allow my dd to do, with age appropriate products and what I encourage ds to do too.

https://www.cbc.ca/amp/1.7088691

Make sure she’s not on tiktok for a start…

Well, it's just what I do when I have a shower. It's as much a routine as having a shower and washing my hair and body. Something I do to stay feeling, looking and smelling clean. Sunscreen before I leave the house if I remember /have time. You can call it a routine, but it's a far cry from nine Korean products ritually applied morning and evening (or whatever is all the rage on TikTok now).

Why on earth would you book a completely unnecessary appointment with a dermatologist for a child of 11 that will no doubt have perfect skin? To tell her the obvious, that she doesn’t need the products. If she won’t listen to mum, I very much doubt she will listen to a dermatologist.

My 10 yr old is similar. As a result I found a dermatologist online who does reviews of products on if they are good for young skin.

we discussed not ruining her skin.So we bought a good cleaner/moisturizer and some good but inexpensive make up

It’s really not that young, I was certainly year 7 (age 11/12) when I first got a set of Simple cleanse, tone and moisturise.
Having a decent skincare routine is fine especially if they’re using spf and washing it off at the end of each day.
But it would be helpful if more adults understood skincare ingredients - basic skin care is a healthy habit to get into and it’s worth knowing what you’re putting on your face and why.
I find the “well I’ve only ever used soap and water” people on the thread either patronising or ignorant, or extremely privileged to have never suffered with skin issues that need active ingredients.

Some products are not suitable for children so check about this and advise her / buy accordingly it is not necessarily a bad thing for her to want to take care of her skin. Ultimately though if she is wanting stuff that is excessively expensive and / or you cannot afford then you say so, no, it's too expensive, and that's it. Of course make sure she has some appropriate skin care bits and you could help her to find some at a reasonable price but until she is old enough to actually appreciate the cost and to buy it herself it needs to be kept to a reasonable price I don't see that as being unfair.

There's nothing wrong with being interested in skincare. Brands like Drunk Elephant are very good, and whilst she might not need a glycolic acid exfoliator or retinol at her age, a good cleanser, moisturiser and an SPF will stand her in good stead for encouraging her to to form a life-long habit. Cheaper brands also do good products too.

As for those who only use soap and water, well fine! But you can improve your skin with the right well formulated products.

How depressing. The next generation is doomed.