Nearly 11 year old obsessed with skin care

[Oakstreet]

Getting on my nerves. As far as kids goes she isn't always on social media but all I hear is my friends have it! Fed up. Her dad ended up buying her some, so expensive too, she doesn't need it. I've tried telling her that it is a money spinning scam, and kids her age don't need it. She just doesn't listen, she really is like a stubborn teenager, but still a very a young child who shouldn't even be interested in this stuff. Anyone advice on how to talk to her?

At 11, what social media does she have access to?

She is much too young to be on tiktok or putting shite on her skin. Take some control.

10 year olds do not need a ‘skincare routine’ or ‘good skincare habits’. Obviously if they have a particular skin condition like acne, then it may need addressing specifically. Otherwise, gentle soap and water and maybe some simple cream if it gets dry is more than enough. This fad is insane.

But then again, I am in my 50s and have never done all that cleanse, tone and moisturise nonsense, apart from using sunscreen, and even better, I have stayed out of direct sun. And I have better skin than most people my age.

and how many boys are using these regimes? All we are doing is teaching young girls that their appearance is everything. We are allowing the beauty industry to get their grip on our daughters way sooner than it needs to. We should not tolerate this. Ultimately it is about sexism and consumerism from a young age.

It's not all TikTok either though. My mam didn't go on about skin care too much, but it was a thing for grown ups. It's become more of a thing now, and for younger people in general. It's not bad, but it's not cheap, so kids shouldn't be overly indulged (imo). But it is a balancing act. Kids are experiencing puberty much younger, hormones etc. They need the skincare earlier. But not expensive stuff. (All imo, of course!)

Ugh, I loathe this trend. It's one more way to encourage young girls to focus on their appearance and consider their value in life to be how they look. Not many 10-year-olds actually need to worry about "skin care" -- their skin is probably in wonderful condition.

"What the kids want....."

Doesn't anybody say no to kids these days?

And any parent that buys products like ‘drunk elephant’ for a 10-year-old is an idiot.

My 18-year-old was asking about these products the other day. I explained that she does not need the harsh chemicals within the product, and that it was about the beauty industry exploiting women. She saw sense quickly and decided not to waste her money on these creams. And her skin is just perfect. I said to her that these products are actually aimed at women of my age, wanting to have skin like hers!

Your DD is being marketed and sold to via influencers on social media. It's up to you as the adults to point out was is reasonable and what isn't, just like any other thing being marketed, and put the boundary in (eg age appropriate products yes, drunk elephant for older skin, no).

And don't believe the "but everyone else has got this stuff mum/dad" or fear that they won't be accepted by their peers if they don't have the latest thing. If they're friends on that shallow basis, then they're not the friends you want DD to have, surely?

Getting into the habit of looking after her skin at this age is a good thing. But she needs to understand the importance of buying and using products that are appropriate for HER skin which means making a choice based on the current cult offering, isn't ideal.

For most children at this age, that's a good cleanser, a good moisturiser and an SPF. That's it. No active ingredients.

The Bubble Ones are mostly good and are in the "cool" camp without being excessively expensive, so that's a potential win.

I was into skincare when I was 11 ,and there was no socal media to influence me. I used to experiment with my mam's skincare I found in the bathroom. Eventually , I think my grandma gave me some Oil of Ulay.

It won't do her any harm to use a light daily moisturiser with spf and a lip balm.

Is it any wonder though, look at all they women on here trying to turn back the hands of time with botox. God help these girls once they develop a wrinkle, it's going to be the absolute end of the world.

Will check that out, thanks!

My 12 yr old has been all over this for 12 months,Its Drunk Elephant this and that, Glo Recipe and Sol de janiero ..and if i hear one more thing about Charlotte Tilbury I will scream! The price of it all is so omg levels but they have to have it. I would explain to yours as I do to mine that some things are ok but me things are not too good for her skin at such a young age..will not do you any good whatsoever but you can try like me!!!!!! The final straw this weekend is a mask that has red dots on it and works by from what I can gather works by currents and is L E D ..simply has to have this contraption ..not a hope in hell was my response and now She is sulking! Good Luck OP if you learn success let me know!

Show her this article https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-67993618.amp

My older teen is bad enough, had a load of unnecessary and inappropriate products on her Christmas list which I explained to her I would not be buying and the reasons why. Fortunately she does seem to listen when I tell her that her skin will be better the less she messes with it but the pull of the massive skincare trend on social media is strong! At 11 it’s totally inappropriate.

Get her off TikTok you’re the parent ffs op

Does she have adolescent skin? Greasy, spotty etc? If so, it's understandable if she wants to do something about it. I remember the frustration of wanting to deal with my changing appearance and my mother being strict due to my age - if puberty's happening, it's happening. I don't understand the idea of taking her to a dermatologist though - surely they're there to help people with serious skin problems, not to chat to a 10 years old about how to wash her face?

If she still has the perfect skin of a child, then I guess you just have to treat it like any childhood enthusiasm and harness the good in it, like a PP said about steering her daughter towards gentle products and having facial sessions. More of a bonding experience than a shopping session.

Staying no to this stuff is good parenting. Otherwise, where does it end??

There was something on the news only last week about a girl around the same age in the same situation. It affected her skin and a dermatologist recommended that even the skincare made for teenagers wasn't suitable. She stopped using the products and her skin is OK now.
Might have been bbc? Sorry but I can't remember fully.
If you research it and show her then you might be able to convince yr dd to stop using them. They're really expensive and a trend right now. Mostly skincare companies just trying to make a quick buck out of parents.

If it's drunk elephant loads of it isn't suitable and will damage her skin

@whatdidshedotogetahillnamedafterher it's good for your DD to learn to deal with disappointment, even if she is sulking. It's something we all have to learn to deal with in life as we can't have everything we want, whenever we want it.

She'll learn that life goes on, but you might want to ask her why she 'needs' it, because I dare say it's not because of her skin. Peer pressure and a need to fit in? Feeling insecure about friendships? Girl friendships can be really hard to navigate for some as some girls can be very manipulative and involve power play.

There was an article on the BBC by dermatologists saying it's damaging for young skin.
Never mind ridiculous!

’don't understand the idea of taking her to a dermatologist though - surely they're there to help people with serious skin problems, not to chat to a 10 years old about how to wash her face?’

exactly. Just be a parent. You don’t need specialist advice on how to say no to your child for goodness sake.

It's good for her to get into a nice basic routine. I've always had dry skin and it would have felt dreadful at any age if I'd not moisturised. But a basic routine using something like Simple will be grand....maybe The Ordinary as well although don't know their stuff as well but it's quite 'in' and not too expensive.

This is the one I meant! I'm glad someone else found it. If you play it esp the dermatologist part hopefully will help.
Also mention the packaging aspect /damage to the planet etc.
At the end of the day though if you don't buy it for her then she's no choice. Good luck!

I have put a stop to it since the BBC article came out and quite frankly it was getting ridiculous. All her friends in her class are getting this skincare and it's expensive and not necessary - for those who say the parents shouldn't buy it, it has just snowballed into an issue. I told her she was too young and she said " you're never too young to start a good skincare routine" That really shocked me how much she was being targeted.

My 10yr old was marketed to through You tube (she is not allowed on TikTok) - watching 10 yr olds promoting this stuff. She said they're allowed it why can't I and I explained that they are being paid (exploited) to promote this stuff.