DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

One house on our street has one. We call it the "Brexit house" without knowing anything about the owners. Though at Christmas they fly a hohoho flag instead, which is kind of fun.

White rose flags are everywhere in Yorkshire, especially rural North Yorkshire.

My husband put up a flag pole in the back garden. I never wanted it. The ropes knocking against the pole in the wind is very annoying. He has various flags so it’s not always the same one flying. The interest has waned over the years and I have flatly refused to have certain ones flying that may be considered controversial although one visitor was thrilled we put one up from his country as a welcome.

without knowing anything about the owners
Of course.

It's the noise that would bother me. There's a house across the road from us with a loose bit on their TV aerial. When it's windy it makes hell of a racket. I think a flag pole plus flag and ropes would be very noisy indeed.

Can't he just put up a smaller version?? Or is he particularly keen on the whole raising and lowering of flags routine?

There’s a house in my village that has one. When it’s windy the constant ping, ping, ping of the rope banging on the pole is annoying. I’m glad I don’t live near it.

It is really only in US where people do this flag thing, I saw it literally nowhere else, so it is not just UK... Unless you are a crazy nationalist no one does it.

It would put me off buying a house in a street. Given the current political climate in the uk the message suggests bigotry.

I wouldn’t encourage it but I don’t like flag waving. Depending which flag you fly people could misinterpret your political leanings. There are quite a few Welsh flags round here. Unfortunately the St George’s England flag has become associated with hooliganism and racism while the Welsh flag is just associated with pride. I don’t think it’s particularly fair and think it’s better to save flags for public buildings on special occasions. Patriotism can soon morph into something else.

Is he from Northern Ireland and got lost?
Is he mad?

Your plan -say you looked it up and you can't as there's a convenant on the house forbidding it.
Neglect to give him the docs or help him look for them.

Like most men he will wait for you to do the admin and produce the paperwork. Which you will not.

So, no flag.

Ps move to Belfast he will be right at home.
Although research carefully where in Belfast, or it could be a very short lived move.

Red flag 🚩
LTB

😀
It is quite sweet that it’s a childhood dream, but like you op, no bloody way.

It’s true though - a flag and picture of Farage in your window sends a very clear message about who you are.

If you fly the flags of Scotland, Ireland and Tuvalu?

Maybe he could get his kerbstones painted as well 😁

That you are a Fascist ?????.

Well it's not ridiculous to call Farage a fascist as he is one.

@Maireas - it seems pretty clear from the OP’s post that that’s not the case.

This is what they do… reel you in, marriage, children, joint finances… lulled into a false sense of security and normalcy. Then, BOOM. Drops the flagpole bombshell. Union Jack top hats and Charles and Camilla teapots are just around the corner.

My sympathies OP. Thoughts and prayers.

Is it a midlife crisis thing like a Harley Davidson ?

Having a flag in your garden/yard from what I recall visiting my close friend and her DH where they live in Delaware is quite common. Is it patriotic? Yes. Their NDN who had it was a quite cute guy into property developing, wore a Stetson and my friend wanted to get me to date him!

My friend wouldn’t have a flagpole, not because she’s not patriotic as she is. But she’s Jewish, her DH isn’t, and he used to be a republican but she’s always been a democrat and he’s been for a while too.

In your DH’s case in one way it’s nice and patriotic, in another way it’s too much. Like BNP, even though you say he’s none of those things. I guess you want to be prepared for a bit of ridicule if you get one.

We have one in our back garden after my impossible to buy for DH said he'd like one. We generally take it down in winter as they get tattered and put it up in spring. We have a selection of football and country flags for various things (often football related). I love to see it fluttering in the breeze and like the clinking that reminds me of boats at the seaside.
The following Valentine's Day I happened to come across a bugle in a charity shop and bought that for him too - thinking that he'd mark the changing flag with an occasion. He can't get a note out of it snd it's never been used but he says it's the best present ever! And loves it!
#teamflag.

Dear god no. Blame the covenants and tell him to move on!

there’s a bloke who flies a Union Jack outside his bungalow in the village. I’m almost tempted to put up an EU flag and the two flags of the countries my grandparents were from … but I prefer roses in the garden to flags 😂

🤣🤣most likely yes! Or a sports car.

Big security red flag (ha)

“Darling, it would be lovely to raise the flag every morning and lower it every evening.

Perhaps you could learn the bugle.

Perform the Last Post. 'At the going down of the sun', and so on.

The routine raising and lowering would flag up that we're in, and being vigilant.

Of course, the flag not moving would be a huge announcement to the local criminals that we're away …

Oh my goodness, your wonderful coin collection … It would be such a shame to no longer have it …

We'd need to pay a flag-sitter.

I wonder what that would cost?

You know, every time we go away on holiday, or if we're late home. Someone we could call, like Batman, who'd rush over and perform the ceremony.

They'll need bugle lessons too….

Perhaps some sort of uniform. With a woggle.”

And so on. Could be fun

Lots of flags where I live, mostly County flags tho, not union jacks, which somehow seems less “aggressive”.. would that be a compromise?