DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

More of a presumption than assumption.

On the balance of probability, I would agree with them too.

I haven’t read the whole thread but I believe there are quite a few legal restrictions around flagpoles and flag-flying. My parents bought a property with a flagpole in the front garden and as a family we were joking about what flags to fly - but we found out there are some restrictions.

In the end the flagpole was removed, should’ve kept it so your DH could have it 😂

It's very narrow minded and judgemental, though. Live and let live.

This is pure fiction.

Ever noticed all the St George flags flown without exciting any police interest on 23rd April and around World Cup time?

That's the most unBritish patriotic act I think I've heard of!!

During the coronation I put up union jack bunting as did my neighbours. Would people assume I’m BNP?!

I'd rather people not judge others for anything ridiculous including colour of skin or what they have in their front garden. Definition of innocuous is not harmful or offensive but I would find it pretty offensive if people deemed me racist if I had a flagpole in my garden.

Well obviously he didn't mention it when you first got together as he thought you'd run a mile at his eccentricity

Would you have done though? Would you have continued dating if the first time you'd gone back to his place you'd seen his flag pole standing proud? (fnar)

I think it's sweet. Not the flag but the fact he's wanted it since he was a kid. Definitely check with your local planning dept re whether you can do it without planning permission though as there are some restrictions.

How about a county flag?

I can think of at least three properties with them within a couple of miles OP so you're not totally alone, but we are rural.

One St George flag, one European flag and one Ukrainian flag.

I wouldn't go for one at home at the front but we have one for camping and festivals with fun flags. Have been known to put it up in the back garden for kids themed parties (pirate flag type of thing). Could you compromise on a camping style non permanent one?

I think you need some sort of planning permission from the local council but it sounds a great idea.

I wonder if he said he wanted to fly the Palestinian flag the responses on here would be different.

Flag shagger 😂😂😂

We left a house we were viewing where next door had an enormous union flag flying in the garden. But we are in Scotland where these things have a slightly different texture. So the neighbours might not like it.

It's not hurting anyone, and if it's only visible when people come into your garden surely these people are friends/family or the postman. The postie won't care, and if your family friends love him they'll accept his little quirk. Don't worry about the opinion of random strangers! Let him live! :)

Well, this thread wasn't what I expected from the title! But it is an interesting read.

I wouldn't choose to have one, would think my partner was a little odd (but I think everyone has their own oddities, and thats fine as long as they don't hurt others) if he wanted one, and wouldn't presume anything about others who have one.

There is a house in my parents village with a house bracket one. The bloke who lives there does all the village lighting (Christmas lights in the church yard etc) and as well as the flag his house is often lit up with various displays. I wouldn't want my house to look like that, but his makes me smile.

On balance I think given your DH childhood imaginations, and the fact he wants it 20 years on, I'd suggest a bracket one (for me I'd put it from the garage not the house). I'd get it for his birthday - imagine his joy.

Get a Swedish flag and people will think you are IKEA
I like the idea. I understand your objections but how can you be mad if you're flying a Jolly Roger??

You don't need planning permission and the rules around flying flags don't apply to private residential residences. We're not living in North Korea FFS.

It's a shame that in this country flying the flag has negative connotations attached to it.

There are two houses in our village that have flag poles though I don't know if they raise them every morning! They do however swop out the flags for different causes, Ukraine, Israel etc.

I weirdly find it a bit endearing. Wouldn't fancy it myself but it's a way of telling people what you believe in.

Would he be playing God Save the King loudly every day as the flag goes up?

I can see 2 flagpoles from my house, one is in a house occupied by a lady and her mother and the flag is changed regularly, so it's not just a "male thing". Although we have no desire for a flagpole of our own, I quite like seeing the different flags they put up. There are a few more dotted about the village too.

I'd be inclined to let him have one, imagine his excitement when he has cause to change a flag, and gifts sorted for quite some time.

There are a few houses with flagpoles near me and I like them.

This is such a harmless and trivial thing that would make your husband happy, it seems really mean not to let him have his fun. Why would you want to deny joy to someone you love just in case a few irrelevant people think it’s odd?

Flagpole Planning Permission comes Under 'The Town and Country Planning Act 1990. Flagpoles are listed under the definition of advertisement. It is essential that you get planning permission before installing your flagpole in order to comply with regulations.

FFS !.

I am looking at one right now at the top of our neighbours garden. It is currently flagless as they get incredibly tangled and tattered in the wind. They are a really pleasant couple in their 60s. We have lived here four years and still everytime I look at this flag I don't understand the point.