DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

I love your badass Grandad and his expression. I hope she rests in peace 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

Don’t worry. You can keep them all flying. Decorate your house with them! Nobody can stop you. (Don’t know about that planning permission stuff though).

There's a house in my village with a flagpole and they have so much fun with it! They do all occasions such as Easter, Halloween, Christmas and they have a unicorn one too! If you did this and not just the union flag you could make it into a nice thing

My DH has also held a desire for a flag pole.and got one.!
And I don't mind at all..Ours is at the bottom of the garden. He fly's the Union Jack at patriotic times...a special one for Remembrance Day The England flag for St George's Day
The Ukraine flag was also hoisted.
And lastly ..the flag of his beloved Newcastle United. He's an exciled geordie so the flag flies on match days.
He's retired and something he loves to do. It hurts nobody. nobody minds

Except my elder dsis who is too snotty for words. 😂

Team flag here, I love seeing a flag when we're out and about, especially regional ones. I like the Lincolnshire one, where we live, and seeing the Cornish one when we go on holiday.

Tempted to get a flag now for the front garden.

As a nonwhite Brit, if I was viewing a house on a road that had a union jack/ England flag, I'd assume they were edl members.

Nope my mere existence is offensive enough on its own without the addition of flags… I don’t even know how I am allowed to keep breathing the air.

The shaming of simply being British has weird and extremely uncomfortable undertones that are quite sinister - just for having the audacity for being born on this wee craggy island we must live with our heads bent in shame. Flags hidden. It feels like….a new version of fascism actually.

We had one with a RoSPA flag at work, it fell down in a storm.

I actually want a flagpole. My DH has taken down TWO! (old houses) and I would like a New one.
But due to my child I wouldn’t be able to keep the flag-flying rules here, and they are pretty strict, so until next decade it’s a no sadly.

Only if you are completely ignorant as to what fascism actually is.
You don't need a tacky flag to love your country.

So, racists like to fly the flag. And? Does that mean by default that everyone else should be ashamed of it? Good grief.

It was my understanding that the EDL disbanded in 2015, and the former leader is a convicted criminal, so I’m not sure how they would be so active in any area as to cause any citizen harm.

So the Union flag is tacky now? 🤦🏻‍♀️

That’s my parents house! They’ve struggled to get new ones and the old flags got a bit tattered. Will remind them in time for the Easter flag!

I know exactly what fascism is and shaming and silencing is a tool of choice.

This is weird scout-leader style behaviour

Strange you should say that; the only people I know who fly flags are indeed scout leaders, and now it turns out OP's OH is one too

It's a free world though so if he wants his flag SO much why not?

Thank you. He was a legend - they still talk about his antics in the church 50 years on.
Yep people remember my uncle offering ti sit at the back ‘to give any latecomers a hymn book’ (when actually he wanted to deploy his pea shooter), my mum’s constant giggling, my youngest uncle lining up smarties on the pew and flicking them off, their border terrier locked in the vestry ‘joining in with the hymns’, and my grandad in the middle of the chaos, blissfully unaware 🤣🤣🤣🤣

The house behind me has a flag pole and flies various flags for different occasions and flies at half mast when there’s been a death, he must have a large collection as I have seen quite a few.

That is a seriously lovely post and made me smile. What a great man with a congregation that was far more fun and exuberant than my own as a child!! Oh to have smarties in church 😇

You're very good at knowing what people of colour should think and feel, aren't you...

And if you want to see some real fascism...

https://edition.cnn.com/2023/11/11/world/far-right-protestors-disrupt-armistice-day-london/index.html

I know it’s quite common in America.

Yes and no. I'm American. It's quite common for private houses to fly the flag, but not to have a full fledged flag pole in the front garden. As previous posters have pointed out, most houses that fly the flag have a short pole on a bracket attached to the house. It has a high position and a lower position for half-staff. And most people I know only fly it on national holidays.

We have one ourselves. We only fly the US flag on national holidays, but we also have a flag for a university sports team that flies whenever they play.

We did fly the US flag at half staff for the late Queen and for Jimmy Buffett.

Not you again with your bat shit chanting and sadism claims!

< rushes off for holy water and pearls >

I have a couple of neighbours with flag poles. One of them changes their flag up fairly regularly (they had a Ukraine one, an LGBT one, etc.)... I wouldn't think twice about it, tbh.

Chanting?