Thinking DS' travel itinerary is none of our business

[WelshMeg]

DS is 18, he's going inter-railing in the summer 6 weeks or so all in, with 5 friends.
Last night he was talking about his itinerary, they have decided to pre-book all their hostels as apparently it's not uncommon in some places to be unable to get a room.
In the 48 days I think it is they are travelling they have booked for 20 different cities. They aren't doing any massive travel days but some are more complicated than others (like getting from Lake Bled to Trieste or having to get a boat across Lake Como to get to the hostel) but generally they aren't travelling more than 4 hours in a day and there are quite alot of 1/2 hour journeys like Venice - Lake Garda - Milan, Lausanne - Geneva etc.
DH thinks they will be exhausted, I think yeah they probably will be but it's not our business and leave them to figure it out?
They are staying 2-3 nights in each place (maybe one place is a one night stay but I think it's because of trains).
AIBU thinking it's not our business and we shouldn't warn him? Or should we suggest they change it up so they aren't moving so quickly all the time.

They are young enough to cope, I would keep out of the planning.
However, he might give careful thought to back yo plans in case he loses his passport or phone. DS travelled a lot ( the ‘Stans, hike across Italy, road trip across the US) and always emailed itineraries, photos of passport and other documents etc to himself and to us.

DD did that last summer (with one friend) and had a blast! Exhausting true but would do it again. Like your husband I had my reservation (like waiting for the next train in the middle of nowhere in Germany at 2am ) but she learned loads. Yes they should book all their hostel (summer they are packed) and also reserve all their train seat as well, generally that doesn't cost more than £2-£5 but worth it to make sure they have on seat, it is really really busy in the summer.

I’d do it now if I could, have done interailing a couple of times like that and it’s good.

I did meet a guy who hadn’t paid for any accommodation at all- just booked travel every night and slept on the train or bus- now he was knackered!

He is 18 he will be grand. I used to go clubbing Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday and still work full time and do hobbies each night.

Sounds totally doable to me? I'm pretty sure when my friends and I did something similar we only stayed one night at most places and had many overnights on the trains where one of us was awake to keep watch on our stuff at any point. That was part of the fun of it. Just let him find out for himself....

Also make sure you have an emergency phrase he will include in requests for help, if he doesn't use it then be very suspicious of such requests from 'him'. So many families are conned by those who steal phones and send emergency requests.

I went interrailing three summers in a row when I was in my late teens/early twenties. I don't think we stayed more than 2 nights anywhere and often took overnight trains to save money. It was brilliant fun. Yes, I remember being tired but at age 18 you recover quickly. The point of interrail is that you can travel all over. Let him and his friends plan their trip they way they want.

Leave them to it, it’s a learning curve! My son who knows London really well, showed me his and his girlfriend’s itinerary for a big day out there recently. I couldn’t believe what they were trying to fit in, he knew they couldn’t do it but she was insistent it would be fine. It wasn’t 😅 but they got the last train home which was all that really mattered!

I'd just encourage him to ask for himself. There are absolutely tonnes of interrailing groups online where he and his mates can query some of their plans. I'm in a few of them and honestly some of the knowledge is exceptional!
You're right it's not your business and it's not your place to tell him. But DO steer him towards people who have endless knowledge so not only can he check the viability of his plans but also get recommendations about places to include and how to get the most out of his trip. And, of course, if he ignores that advice he'll learn first hand for himself. Interrailing with friends is a good and pretty safe way to learn some independence and life skills. Hope he has a fantastic time

I did similar at 18 and it was fantastic. It was exhausting but I was 18 and slept on the way home. No regrets at all.

There isn’t a hope in hell I’d put myself through it now!

I am always happy to be given advice, I think there is a difference in advice and dictating

He doesn't have to take it

I recall it being gruelling. We decided overnight trains were a good idea to save on a nights accommodation but you arrive at the crack of dawn having had barely any sleep and the hostels won't check you in until afternoon so you hardly feel like lugging your backpack around the sights.

DD did 20 days in Italy last year, hopping about from place to place every 2 to 3 days. On occasion what they thought would be 4 hrs travel became 12, with train delays, missed connections, having to abandon a bus mid journey due to hangovers etc. they missed pre booked travel, hostel bookings etc. but had an absolute ball, and came home shattered.
Id leave them to it, it’s all part of the adventure.

So long as they have top notch travel insurance leave them to it.

Ah please. They’ll be fine. I remember being between 18-25 and I could stay awake for DAYS if I was travelling to somewhere exciting, partying or festivalling (so drinking or on drugs), or if I met someone I fancied enough that I didn’t want to go to sleep. He will have an absolutely brilliant time. Oh to be young again!

I’m still pretty good now I’m old if I’m going somewhere exciting, tbh. Just make sure he has extremely comprehensive travel insurance, portable phone chargers and a credit card to be used in emergencies only (e.g., for a flight home if needed!). They’ll have a bloody great time.

I’m 44 and this sounds less tiring to me than full time work and commuting! Four hours’ travelling a day isn’t onerous when it isn’t every day. I agree with the pp that said late nights are going to be more tiring than the itinerary itself.

They'll be fine.

I went interrailing at 20 and some places we only did one night - some others we stayed the day and got an overnight train elsewhere to avoid paying for a room! All was fine.

Sounds like a normal itinerary for young people. They are going travelling not going on holiday with a purpose of getting a break from work. They will be fine.

Sounds great. I did similar at 18.
I don’t recall my parents even asking about my itinerary. Just waved me off! That was 1998 tho.

So he has a whole week at home once he gets back...

I think 2 or 3 nights in one place is fine, that's a normal length city break. Short train hops in between are not tiring. What does your husband think will be tiring? I went travelling in Africa for 3 weeks when I was 18, and 3 weeks in India when I was 22. We stayed 1 or 2 nights in each place, travel was more arduous due to bumpy buses, dust, heat, long journeys (8 hours plus) including overnight. Sleeping accommodation substandard i.e. noisy, hot, uncomfortable. I don't recall being tired in a physical sense at all. If tired spend a day lying in a park or beach or by a hotel pool or have a lazy cafe breakfast.

Honestly compared to working night shifts or having young children it was positively relaxing

They will be fine.

we are currently backpacking around Australia for 6 weeks with a 7, 10 and 12 year old. Sometimes we have had only 1 or 2 days in places, sometimes we have got up at 4am for a hike.

So far everyone is still alive. Easy interrailling for 18 year olds, they will have a great time.

The one piece of advice I would give is to pack as light as possible. Unless camping, a 25 litre backpack is more than enough, it's so much easier when you can carry it easily, put it on your lap if need be etc. Also leave it a quarter empty in case he buys anything and to fit food in. Take some washing powder to enable washing of underwear and t shirts.

Absolutely don’t get involved. It sounds exhausting now but I did the inter rail thing when I was about 20 - and was MUCH less organised than it sounds like your son in being.

we made some horrible choices, drank too much, showered too little + grossly underestimated how much money we needed. We slept on an Italian station floor with only uht milk to drink for one awful night.

had a truly marvellous time - still giggle about it with the friends I went with. Wouldn’t change a second of it. Or a single one of my bad decisions.

although I have not camped or winged last minute accommodation since. Some lessons indelibly learned.

Let me know if he needs this..

I did this in my 20s. 2-3 days in one place is the norm. I remember getting overnight trains sometimes too. The only thing I think they would miss out on is a bit of spontaneity. I landed in France with a flight booked out of turkey 2 months later and I’d booked a couple of nights in a hostel, a train to the next place and 2 nights after that.. then I just made it up as I went along. You’d get to a hostel and people would be raving about an experience or city they had just come from so I would head there. This was all in the days before smartphones so I had to do internet cafes to book things.