Thinking DS' travel itinerary is none of our business

[WelshMeg]

DS is 18, he's going inter-railing in the summer 6 weeks or so all in, with 5 friends.
Last night he was talking about his itinerary, they have decided to pre-book all their hostels as apparently it's not uncommon in some places to be unable to get a room.
In the 48 days I think it is they are travelling they have booked for 20 different cities. They aren't doing any massive travel days but some are more complicated than others (like getting from Lake Bled to Trieste or having to get a boat across Lake Como to get to the hostel) but generally they aren't travelling more than 4 hours in a day and there are quite alot of 1/2 hour journeys like Venice - Lake Garda - Milan, Lausanne - Geneva etc.
DH thinks they will be exhausted, I think yeah they probably will be but it's not our business and leave them to figure it out?
They are staying 2-3 nights in each place (maybe one place is a one night stay but I think it's because of trains).
AIBU thinking it's not our business and we shouldn't warn him? Or should we suggest they change it up so they aren't moving so quickly all the time.

Sounds brilliant - I travelled around Europe like that when I was 19 with now DH and wasn't knackered at all (oh for the energy of a teenager!!) - some of my happiest memories. Try not to worry x

@VickyEadieofThigh
Sorry if I wasn't clear -
The friends 18th birthday is the 10th then results 15th then off on holiday on the 18th!!

Ah, got it!

Not read full thread. It’s great for your dc to be independently researching / planning / booking, but a couple of gentle nudges would prob be helpful. This was us last year - and we suggested to our dc that they may want to swap one of their destinations for Prague as it would be great to visit (and is reasonably priced, compared to the rest of the places they were booking). They swapped one of them to Prague, and enjoyed it. I did think they had booked a lot of stops, but really enjoyed it at the end of the day. One question - is there a budget for the trip? My dc went interrailing (they went for just over two weeks) it was approx £300 for the tickets/pass, approx £300 for hostels (they pre-booked as well), and it cost another £300 in spending money / food. That was just for 2 weeks! (They did choose some costly locations). I wonder if 6 weeks will be treble that?

They will be fine, sleep on trains and buses, and have a fantastic time.

I'd leave him to it. I did similar at that age, only difference being that we lugged a tent around with us and camped. I loved it, it was a real adventure. I don't remember being tired at all, but I do remember how much I enjoyed a proper shower, clean clothes and own bed when I got home.

Just noticed you mentioned a friend’s 18th after they get back… worth checking but the 17 year old may not be allowed to stay in most of the hostels - (it’s in the small print, maybe because they are still classed as a child?). this altered my dcs plans last year as there was a late summer 18th birthday.

He'll be fine! DS did it in September and I was tired just looking at his itinerary but he had an absolute ball.

It sounds fab, and they'll be fine. And, if they're not, then they can sort it out for themselves. The last thing they need is dreary old parents interfering.

They checked all this - also part of the reason they have booked in advance!!

They have spent about £1650 on flights, passes and hostels but some places were really expensive (3 Swiss stops and Milan to see Taylor Swift (for the girls more than the boys!!).
They all work part time so they set their own budgets.

He’ll be fine. I did a European walking holiday this year in my mid 40s, walking 15 miles a day carrying all my shit with me, staying in a different place each night and I wasn’t exhausted. Travel days if anything will be restful, Netflix and doom scrolling, it’s the late nights out that will be exhausting if anything. He’ll be fine and sounds like a wonderful adventure.

I did similar one summer during uni, and then another two years of mostly 2 or 3 nights in each place after graduation.
It will be fine don't mention anything to him.

I did interrail at the same age and we only stayed one night in most places and 2 occasionally. It was amazing and yes we were tired but it was a fantastic holiday.

I wouldn’t be so concerned about the travel and tiredness, but I would suggest they re-think the pre booked hotels, or at least some of them. Unless they are very specific about which places they want to go to.

I went inter-railing at 18 and we started off by heading to Venice, but had no fixed plans beyond that. We found that wherever we went, we met groups of people, made friends, travelled with them for a bit, then met more people, travelled with them, and so on. Seasoned travellers that we met recommended places to us, so we went there. We stayed a couple of nights with someone’s family who we met in Amsterdam, and someone else in Zurich. We slept in a campsite in Greece that someone we met in Italy worked at sometimes, so got a cheap deal.

Basically it wouldn’t have been half as much fun if we’d had a fixed itinerary that we’d had to stick to, because of pre-booked hotels. So whilst it’s up to your son and his friends what they do, I would probably mention that they might not want to be tied down.

I don't see the problem.

Last year I had a week's holiday & stayed in 5 different places, and another 14 day holiday staying in 8 places..
I'm a tad older than 18.

I’m doing 8 destinations in 14 nights later this year, including a transatlantic flight, 5 hour time difference and driving between destinations (with one day driving 5 hours). I’d do more and longer if I didn’t have a job I needed to get back to.

I’m not remotely worried I’ll be tired (and I’m a lot older than 18 and need a lot of sleep to function)… he will absolutely be fine.

I doubt I stayed anywhere for more than two nights on my gap year travels. If they are knackered they can have some lazy days, it will be great.

Just stay out of it!

I did months of this sort of thing in Australia at that age, only without accommodation booked ahead. Just get on bus, get off, hope to find a hostel. Great time!

If it was my (obstinate) teen I'd offer my unsolicited thoughts and let him decide. Mine did need rescuing at the end of a phone but only financially

I think it sounds absolutely fine. My husband and I did 7 cities in 16 days via train and we weren't exhausted (quite a bit older than your son). At 18 i definitely would've coped with that itinerary. He will have an amazing time

I did a five month trip round Asia and New Zealand on my own in my early twenties. There were three places I stayed for about a week, but most most of the time I was moving on every two or three days. I was knackered when I got home but I had a fantastic time. You have so much more energy at that age. You also enjoy the actual travelling part, lots of time staring wistfully out the window on trains thinking profound young person thoughts! I'm sure he'll have a wonderful time.

I'm 33 and could manage that on a diet of red bull and a few cocktails.

I went inter railing at 19. I could not manage now what I did then. He will be fine. He is young and presumably healthy.

My child booked an over ambitious itinerary with their friends. They amended their plans when they were out there and cut out one of the destinations. It is not all set in stone and they can adapt as they go along. Should they wish. It’s a good lesson to learn.