No inheritance because of pilot training

[Poily]

My brother is a pilot for a major airline in the UK. My parents were not able to borrow against their house to fund it so had to use pretty much all their savings. £150k was roughly what was spent.

Due to their failed business (folded just after Covid) they racked up massive loans trying to save their hospitality-related business. When they sell their house they won’t end up with much.

So I don’t know exactly how it works but some of that £150k ends up in a bond which the airline then pays out to my brother every month in his pay packet. But if my brother walks away from the airline he walks away from this bond also. It’s a lot of money. Gets paid over 7 years I think.

AIBU to think my brother should not quit his job and move to the Middle East (stupid salary) as he plans to do? He way paying that bond money to my parents.

Brother has said he will cover my parents bills. Great. Thats the right thing to do. But that cuts me out. As my parents were transferring the bond
money into a savings account for my kids.

AIBU?

Then there is a massive disparity in the way they’ve helped you as adults. I totally understand your frustrations here. However it is not about inheritance.

Did your parents promise to help you or leave you more when they made this massive loan?

This is exactly what I thought, of course OP will think that's fine am.sure!

Take the inheritance factor out of it. Your parents are still alive so this money was a loan to your brother. He has paid some of it back but still owes them the balance.
Personally I wouldn’t have promised either of you siblings anything. Yes I would have loaned him the money, made him aware that it was loan to be paid back. Wether he changes jobs or not, he still owes them, they should be paying their own bills and insisting on him paying them back the balance on the loan. Any repayments would have gone into my own account to offset my own debts before giving it to my grandchildren.
They need to think of their own future living expenses and how this will affect them.

Well I hope they do rely on golden child son for elderly care in the future and don’t look to you.

30 or 40k was also paid for something called type training after the initial lump sum.

How is it a gift if he’s paying £700 rent for them each month? He’s still paying them money just in a different form. You just don’t like it because it doesn’t benefit you directly. I don’t get your logic.

Oh stop it. You're far too involved in your brothers finances.

Op, ATPL c£60k
type training another c£30-40k
£150k would give him all the licences he needs plus 2 years living expenses.

I am not sure he has been entirely honest with your parents…

Well, that's usually exactly what it is, if someone dies intestate.

What your brother decides to do with his life is nothing to do with you, you don't get a say. The money issues is between him and his parents ,again, you don't get a say.

How has it been forgotten? Presumably if he wasn't paying the rent then your parents would have to. So what he is giving direct to the landlord means your parents don't have to hand their money over. They can then use the money they would have spent on rent to put into an account for your DC. He is still paying back the loan.

How long ago did he start paying it back?

It's your parents money. They get to choose how to spend it. End of.

Please quote people when you're replying.
Click on the three dots and choose QUOTE.

It makes it easier to read the thread.

It's nothing to do with inheritance. Your parents need to decide whether the money was a gift or a loan. if it was a loan then he needs to set up a plan to pay it back even if that means he is paying off their debts instead. Inheritance is what's left when your parents die which could be years away and there's no guarantee of anything being left. If you are upset that they have not loaned / gifted you £150k then take that up with them, they may have thought they could give you the same to make things equal but then their business went bust and things change.

If he’s worked for the airline for day 2 years does that mean there’s around £30-40k in an account for your dc so far?

your db will take on rent / bills for the future. I think to me that sounds like you have a net gain?

So due to Covid, training took 4 years not 2 plus brother did something extra (don’t want to say what as I’ve heard it’s extremely rare) to increase employability. Involved being abroad for a 2nd time.

May work out to slightly under £150k but not by much.

Oh and also there were some relevancy training that needed to be paid for as too much time had lapsed between certain things cause of Covid.

Brother is a good guy, wouldn’t steal from parents

Replies never work for me

If it was a gift he wouldn’t be paying their rent and living expenses

He’s simply paying it back in a different way

If your parents have decided to stop gifting your children money then that’s entirely their choice.

I cannot understand the mentality of someone who is focused on their kids potential inheritance when their parents have lost their entire business.

Even if he gave them back the €150k now, surely theywill need it to cover living expenses in their retirement.

You aren't entitled to anything, neither are your children. Inheritance is a nice to get but believing you are entitled to it is just wrong.

It doesn’t work for anyone. That’s why the quote function should be used to make the thread easier to follow

I genuinely don’t get it.

He was paying your parents back every month.

Your parents have had a change in financial circumstances so that they now have rent and bills to pay.

Rather than paying money that they put aside each month, the money is now being used to pay their rent and bills, an expense they didn’t have before. The difference is rather than your brother paying your parents to pay third parties, he pays the third parties directly.

It sounds like your parents’ money / inheritance was always going to be lost because of their change in circumstances. Your brother isn’t backing out of the arrangement or avoiding paying them back. Any money they would have had through him paying them back was never going to be given to you any more.

Maybe the parents had paid their mortgage so didn't have costs previously. Although it doesn't sound like it if they are walking away with barely anything. But either way, they should withdraw the bond money they've been putting in an account for the gc and pay their debts down. They can't afford to sit on money anymore.

It also sounds like the dB is paying more than 700pm for the patents so they are getting their 150 plus more back.

Grabby op should be glad her parents are going to have a secure home and nice standard of living for their retirement. Not moaning she isn't going to be left anything.

The repayment method changing isn’t the reason why there’s no money being added to the inheritance fund.
Think about it - your parents still have the £700 that they would have normally paid to the landlord. Money isn’t being added to the inheritance account because your parents can’t afford to add £700pm to it. They need the £700 to live on because Cost of Living etc, not because your brother is paying the landlord.

Inheritance is never guaranteed. If your brother died tomorrow or your parents needed a private medical operation, wouldn’t you encourage them to use the money in the inheritance account ? Or would you still insist that they saved 150k for you?

Why has the loan become a gift if he’s still paying them a big wedge of cash each month, albeit direct to a landlord?

He’s repaying the loan. You’re not getting any money because your parents are skint and can’t afford it, due to them losing their business and home. There’s nothing left for you to inherit.

But at least due to this outstanding debt that your brother has, they won’t be destitute as his loan repayments will be covering their bills.

How much financial support have you offered them in their hour of need?