Realistic plan to pay school fees or not?

[cargear01]

Hope to save 60k by the time ds is 5, hes 2 at the moment and I have 24k.

I am able to save around 1k a month towards this at the moment (I do this without factoring in the cms below and can manage).

it would mean when school fees start that I could pay half from the 60k and half from my own income. I haven’t included cms in my calculations as I don’t want to ‘rely’ on it (insane that that’s the state of this country but I’m working on worst case scenario). That said, ex currently pays 700 maintenance and he is a workaholic so I suspect it will go up. He works in the nhs so can’t really get out of it.

do you think my plan is doable? Should I be doing more? Is it totally unrealistic? I have assumed fees will be around 18k a year when dc starts, taking account of inflation.

I'd consider looking at state until at least 8 on those numbers unless dad is fully on board, it's too much taking into consideration that vat may be added and inflation.

And also when you look at the ratio of private to state at our best universities compared to ratio of kids educated in the state sector, then stating kids are prioritised from state schools is clearly nonsense.

Honestly, if you have the money to consider private but not enough to comfortably pay right through to 16/18, then I'd go state primary and save hard for private secondary.

It's not just fees (as we found out) but obviously uniform (which was very pricey) and then all the trips and extra curriculars. Yes they are optional, but my daughter would have wanted to do some of what her friends were doing.

You absolutely do not want to spend all your money on private primary and then have to switch out to state secondary if indeed there isn't much suitable where you live. In my UK city, primaries are mostly a much of a much really, but the secondaries are a real mix. I would definitely go and see some primaries for yourself.

And also when you look at the ratio of private to state at our best universities compared to ratio of kids educated in the state sector, then claiming kids are prioritised from state schools is clearly nonsense.

The cost of educating a child from 4 to 18 in private school is at least £250K. Don't start your child in private school unless you are very certain that you can keep them there.

I agree with the lady who works in a finance dept - this is very much being taken seriously and you should plan for it to be the case because the reality is that it’s almost certain to happen at some point in the next 15 years.

Both of mine have been fortunate enough to be privately educated throughout however I will say this until I am blue in the face - if you have ANY doubt about affordability, please wait until ideally seniors or at least juniors. Seniors has the biggest impact, and the worst thing would be a move from private to state in seniors for financial reasons. Whatever people tell you, it is a HUGE, indescribably huge culture shock.

If you are not 110% on affordability for the full 15 years, don’t start. Wait until they’re older.

We decided to do state primary and private secondary due to similar finances, we have 2. Have now decided to stick with state as we would still find it tight for any increases and friends who had done both said having to move from private to state was a massive upheaval and we think we may struggle to get the second through to 18 if fees go up. I would try saving as you are and review how things are at Y5 when you start looking at secondaries. If I'm honest our local state primary has given a much better experience for my kids as the local private felt a bit overwhelming when they were little, it very much depends on the child/school as to what is best for them

I'd also question why you don't think schools are good? Ofsted? (that means very little, the worst school my dc attended had a 1, the best a 3!) hearsay? Also things change. Many children who are eventually privately educated go to state primary for at least 3 years.

You will get battered by the posters who can’t or won’t pay for education. Vehemently. Especially in AIBU.

Some people who didn’t privately educate seem to have feel very threatened by those who want to. You’re better off posting on a specific board.

I think you should look at the total cost of private education from 5-18 , and then work out whether you can afford the fees. Senior schools are a lot more then junior school fee plus the extras and inflation.

If you read the thread you will see that after 100+ posts this is not at all the case. OP has overwhelmingly received sensible, pragmatic advice with minimal prejudice against private schooling.

In the current climate I'd be building the biggest and best pension I could.

Not particularly. I just assumed you were from the US or at least not from England, where we usually use Public to describe the top boarding schools. Which is why I asked if you were from the US. I also, mistakenly, thought you might like to know the terminology that we usually use in the UK as you are an educator. Just like if I taught in the US I would familiarise myself with the terms they use there.

Haven’t read the whole thread so perhaps this has been said but I think it’s hard for DCs to transition from private back to state. So maybe don’t start what you can’t finish? My DCs state educated through primary, private from secondary as that’s where I felt the money was better spent. The extras at secondary are eye-watering - school trips, lunch, sports kit, transport etc add up significantly. Personally i felt the money was better spent on holidays, extra-curricular activities, clubs etc when they were young and I could support their learning at home by reading, helping with homework etc. Once you’re in the private school system I imagine it’s very tough to leave and if you can’t afford it comfortably you’ll be making enormous and potentially unsustainable financial sacrifices.

How bad can the local primaries be ? Could you not help his studying with a tutor if teaching is that bad in your local schools? Then a tutor to prep him for private secondary nearer the time? It’ll be much much cheaper than full primary fees and not eat up your savings as much and you’ll have more towards a private secondary then.
My daughter did state primary to year 5 then a year of home education then private secondary. It didn’t put her at a disadvantage at all- in fact she was ahead. Doing v well still and will go to uni after A levels.

hear Hear.

FFS engaging respectfully is an actual thing you know. As is using appropriate terminology in the actual context of the conversation and not using misogynistic slurs.

[Sorry long reply]

This sounds doable, but:

1. I assume you are not planning on ever having a second child?
2. School fees go up - both for each year group and in response to economic factors. Ours started at £12K per annum in the junior school and are now £22k at year 11. They will be nearly £29k in 6th form. This is before uniform, and any extras like school trips (some will be subject related and, thus, effectively compulsory like the BattleFields trip re ww1), music or drama lessons and uniform, the costs of DofE etc.
3. My kids have been happy though and, as both ended up being diagnosed with ASD/ADHD or ASD alone, they struggled with large classes and year groups at the local state schools so the decision to go private was essential and informed by their needs. However, had they not struggled at state schools, I am not sure the value added on £20-27k pa is really there - we are moving our son to a state 6th form in September as it’s free, has the highest intake at Oxbridge of any non selective state school, great stats on students attending Russell Group Unis and medical schools (vis a vis both state and private schools in the area) - and he loved it, of course. Small private schools have fewer options for GCSEs and A Levels so that, for my son, going to a 6th form where the staff levels and timetable meant he can take 4 A Levels was a bonus.
4. There is considerable disparity of wealth between the students. Some struggle to find the fees and live very modestly, others are children of A List actors/Tv personalities and film directors. My DS is completely unphased by this and is in a lovely year group; my DD had a lousy time in her year group as the girls were very focused (during Covid) of all this stuff. She developed a real chip on her shoulder (that she was so privileged, ironically, even though we are nowhere in the league of the celeb class 🤣 just boring professionals). Just something to be aware of if you are planning to invest all your income into school fees.
5. I live in an area with both good and mediocre states schools, but most of my friends have been very happy with the state schools their kids have attended and the universities they’ve ended up in - which is shaped by the fact that they were a) heavily supported in all their out-of-school activities and b) that their parents could afford those activities due to no school fees (eg county tennis players, ice skating medalists, Royal Ballet Saturday school).
6. Just a word of warning that private schools do not necessarily handle bullying, special educational needs or any other areas of conflict any better than state schools. Many of my friends, and myself included, have been deeply frustrated by the need to be forceful and proactive to get issues addressed and support put in place. In fact, in some private schools as they are a quarter to half the size of their state school counter parts, the provision of SEN services is often woefully lacking.

As others have suggested, saving in case you need to go private is great, but I’d advise you to look at the local state schools, catholic/church schools if those apply, and really be sure that you would be getting the experience for your child that you imagine.

Nope. I am Scottish and went to school in the Scottish state system. I have never heard “public” used to mean state, and I have known that a “Public school” means Eton etc since I was about 10.

Although state consideration is a viable one. I think most people know that and respectfully, it isn't what the OP asked. She was asking a financial question.
Anyway, the older children get rhe more tricky it can be to move them as they are settled with friends etc. Also, places may not be available at y10 and then you're a bit stuck.

I have heard good things about Trent College also.

I sent my DS along the private route.

When I first planned his senior school (he was aged 7) the fees 13-18 were £15k pa
when he completed his final year, the final fees were £15k per term.

As a general rule
fees 3-7 are £X
fees 7-12 are £2X
fees 13-18 are £4X

The school inflation rate is often higher than wage inflation, or general inflation.

We were lucky, as the fees to 12 were comfortable and there were grandparents who would have been prepared to step in and help in case of redundancy or illness etc. However, the last few years were comparatively tough.

On a positive note, you then find University costs easy <only partially spoken in jest and absolutely acknowledging the struggle many feel>

If you are going to struggle financially at the start, it might be worth using state schools to 11 (and saving, saving, saving while you do) and having enough money to choose the right secondary school, when DS is more”formed” as to his needs. Also, there were parents who truly struggled with the fees and I remember overhearing a conversation of boys in my kitchen. The boys were very aware of their parents has overly stretched their selves financially - they were appreciative, but oh so stressed by it.

Good luck to you and DS.

The OP is in England - surely not too hard to use the correct terminology.

I’d save like mad and just do private secondary, maybe prep if you’ve saved a lot, but pre prep really isn’t worth it. Save your money.

This.

If you are not certain about the figures and affordability, I would start him in state.

There are many good primary schools and the early years are quite play centred.

Do the latter half of primary and secondary private where it makes more of a difference.

Running out of funds and having to change from a private to state school in upper secondary is much more difficult.