Realistic plan to pay school fees or not?

[cargear01]

Hope to save 60k by the time ds is 5, hes 2 at the moment and I have 24k.

I am able to save around 1k a month towards this at the moment (I do this without factoring in the cms below and can manage).

it would mean when school fees start that I could pay half from the 60k and half from my own income. I haven’t included cms in my calculations as I don’t want to ‘rely’ on it (insane that that’s the state of this country but I’m working on worst case scenario). That said, ex currently pays 700 maintenance and he is a workaholic so I suspect it will go up. He works in the nhs so can’t really get out of it.

do you think my plan is doable? Should I be doing more? Is it totally unrealistic? I have assumed fees will be around 18k a year when dc starts, taking account of inflation.

I don't really understand cms etc....but if you both work then I would have thought things like nursery and school fees should be split equally unless one parent is paying the other to stay at home....I know that's not how it works but it should be.

But surely if one parent says 'no, I don't want him to go to private school for fourteen years' then they shouldn't have to pay for a private school.

Agree with @Candleabra . 60k won't last long, certainly not until secondary,

@WASZPy if 20% issue arises then I think it’s a definite no, I wouldn’t be able to.

parents tend to gift 2k ish a year, sometimes more, but again wouldn’t want to rely on that

As previous have said, you won’t have enough for 14 years of private education by a long shot. You will have plenty for private school post-primary if you carry on saving like you are now. I think there is much greater value in private education in secondary school aged children - the GCSE/A level years.

I taught across public schools, most were good/great and most kids have a good/very good experience. Don't let your own experience cloud your judgement, public system is not evil and bullying etc happen in private schools as well, you'll just be paying for it. Do visits, do your research, maybe save for private secondary if you think it will be beneficial (and it will have more impact on educational outcomes).

@WinterTreacle yes I think secondary only would be the most comfortable option. The state schools here are absolutely dire though and as a single parent I don’t want to more from my support network

Public schools in the UK are fee paying schools much the same as private. You mean state schools.

Then don't put him into private prep school.
Start in state primary. Reassess when approaching secondary age.

You don't have enough money saved to get through to 18 unless you are able to save £1k a month while he is at prep, which you admit yourself is going to be very difficult.

You have no fall back savings to cover emergencies. Are you renting or paying a mortgage?

It sounds like you've got little other fall back money plus you would need to live very frugally to save £1k a month throughout the primary years.

The stress of dealing with an emergency (you are sick/injured, ex can't work, house damage that is required to be fixed, a sick child stops you working) with zero savings is immense.

Plus - don't you want to enjoy his childhood with holidays, days out, whatever hobbies or activities he might want to do and other fun (including fun things for you) rather than watching pennies just to send him to private school?

The outcomes for children are primarily dictated by the wealth and education levels of their parents, not the school they attend.

Are you in the US? In the UK we usually say state schools. Public schools are boarding schools.

I think you are being incredibly unreasonable to send him to a private school based on your own experiences
I went to private school and my best friend didn’t. Both got into same university and she got a first. (I got 2.1)
She loved her school, I felt academically pressured and inferior to others who had huge houses, several holidays a year, ponies etc
i sent both of mine to state schools - with a plan to look into private schools only if state let them down - and have been pleasantly surprised as to the quality of work they do, the opportunities there and more importantly, how much they love it.
I would do a lot of research and use any savings to move into the catchment areas of schools I loved. You also then have the security of money in your house as opposed to money you will never get back.
in regards to your plan, its going to be tight. Fees are rising ridiculously. What happens if you are ill and can’t work, lose your job or something else. What about all the extras that come with private school and childcare as you are working more?
You could have a nicer house in a better area, still work part time and see your child more and have your child in a good state school, with local friends around

I think at this point, most people are assuming the 20% is coming. At least you have a few years to wait and see what happens.

We only have 4 years to go, but we are assuming it's likely to be 4 years of beans on toast to make it.

Private school at primary level is unnecessary (but I am opposed to it altogether). And it’s very unfair to enrol your kid if it’s going to be tight, then you’ll have to change schools. Plus all the other expenses beyond the fees. Why not actually enjoy your lives together with holidays, hobbies, fun weekends, then stretch to private school. He’ll always be the ‘poor’ one unfortunately

Depends where you live but primary school fees can be anything between 8-20k.
Upper schools 15-40k

Also you need to look carefully at this property in trust for your son and the terms of it
When is it held in trust to? It might be 21 or 25 years - but he would need to be able to access it at 18, sell it and have the cash available by September after turning 18 to pay uni fees and housing costs.
Is that possible? You won't have any cash savings to help bridge any gap or delay in monetising the property under your current plan.

Also bear in mind it would be his money and he could fritter it away whereas if you save cash in your own name for him then you can choose when and under what circumstances he gets it (eg paying for uni)

You need to factor in VAT, it’s almost certain there will be VAT on top within 12-18 months. And fee inflation is more like 8-10%, possibly more when the amount schools have to pay into teachers pensions increases in (I think) 2025.

I don’t see how you make it to the end of secondary.

Also, what if you need emergency funds for something else? What if you can’t work for a time? What if you have another child?

No. This is too tight.

I think you would be far, far, far more sensible to put your money towards moving into the catchment of a really good state primary school, and then saving towards private secondary.

Or you could look into bursaries - these are rarer for private primary but they exist.

My dd's last couple years at private school (6th form) were £25k/year, and that is not particularly high. Fees go up every year. So project forward to secondary which are always higher than primary.

Might it be a better idea to put all the money you are saving into buying a property in an area with better schools? That's kinda what we did - although we're up North, so it doesn't cost all that much to buy a nice house it a nice area compared to the South. That way you would also have the benefit of living in a nice house and still keeping your money. You'd have plenty left over for extra tuition, hobbies, holidays etc.

I think it would be really hard to go from private to state if you ran out of cash. Plus the future is so uncertain - you can't really plan for what's going to happen over the next 20 years.

You haven't answered my point about hus dad's view. If your ex is keen on the idea of private school then he needs to be contributing to fees.

If he's opposed, then how are you going to resolve that?

Adding to the chrorus (having paid several hundred thousand pounds for private prep)

• save for private secondary only . Don’t worry about private primary if you can’t easily afford it
• use some of the savings for music lessons from age seven and as many other extra circurlars you can fit in especially (eg) rugby and cricket if these are the sports played at your target secondary school. Do your research
• Labour will come to power and 20 % vat will be added to fees. Schools may be able to absorb some of costs but fees WILL increase significantly on top of the usual c. 5% annual increase

Private school at primary and then switching to state for secondary/grammar is not always a bad option. Particularly if it is a stand-alone private primary and all the year will be moving on anyway. It can help lay strong foundations for learning - if you choose one with such values and not just for the aesthetics. These are critical years in the developing brain so I wouldn't rule out private primary because you cant go to private secondary. This can be an active choice. I would just have a strong state/grammar plan for secondary - which can include moving if necessary. It is still a great headstart

I think people underestimate how much fees go up over the course of schooling and can really struggle by the end unless their income rises substantially. Don’t forget other costs will likely go up too. Just covering the fees won’t cut it either - there are so many additional expenses.

It’s also not much fun being the poorest kid in a private school because everyone else is doing really expensive things that you just can’t participate in (speaking from experience here) and you can feel very excluded. Not feelings of jealousy per se, but being literally excluded because you can’t afford to join in. It significantly affects one’s ability to make friends when you can’t do out of school things with them, especially during the teenage years.

For me, I would start by getting your child’s father on board. If he will cover half the school fees from 4 until 18 then this plan is manageable. If not, you should think about maybe only doing private for primary or secondary but not both. I did state primary and private secondary but given that some of the best universities are actively trying to increase attendance of state educated children, lots of people do it the other way round now.

One thing to note though - some people think all private schools are good. This is not true. There are some rubbish private schools out there and they are a total waste of money. There are also some fantastic state primaries. My DD got offered a place at our first choice private primary but not our first choice state primary. If she had got into the latter, we would likely have gone with the state primary. But DH and I know the good schools because we have both been through the private system (him from 4) and you really need to do your research if you have not. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking private always equals better.

No Im not in the US. I use whatever vocab pleases me though. I bet most people understoon my message, so sorry you struggled.

I would start in a state primary school and keep saving so you could move them to a prep school for yr5 and then private education for secondary school.
Otherwise you'll deplete most of your savings before the most important part of their education.
If you save your £1k a month, your nursery fees and your cms, you should have enough to comfortably manage years 5 and 6 in prep school, and private education through secondary school.
Don't forget the expensive uniforms, trips etc too. And you'll want a buffer in case anything goes wrong. God forbid you get made redundant or your car gets written off or your mortgage interest rates double..