To think she should look for work?

[Daisydoodo]

my sister is on the migration from tax credits to universal credit. Her husband works and earns around £25k a year and does not aspire to earn anymore she has 6 children 3 over 16 and 3 5-16years she was complaining today that she may be expected to start looking for work when she migrates and how she thinks it’s unfair as she is only just getting her life back now the 5yo is in full time school. AIBU to tell her to get a grip and get a job? I feel awful for saying it but it’s getting on my nerves as I was expected to return after 6 months mat leave. Should the UC system force her to look for work

It's not "scrounging" to legally claim what you're entitled to, no matter your personal feelings on it.

Their father works, as everyone is conveniently ignoring. Top up benefits are different to a completely unemployed household.

@Beezknees it's legal

But it's immoral and greedy, which luckily most on this thread can see!

Imagine if every family carried on like this!

An I'm alright Jack attitude is not helpful.

Anyway, looks like the benefits will stop soon 🤞 and they can start giving instead of taking!

Of course it is. Legality and morality are not the same thing. The whole concept of "entitlement" itself is the problem. Complete lack of personal responsibility, because you're "entitled" to live off everyone else - incredibly selfish, even more so once all 6 kids are at school all day.

Superior morals won't feed your family so if you need it and are entitled claim it. We claim it even with both working as we are entitled to it. Why wouldn't you?

Many things in this life are Immoral and greedy. I think legal tax loopholes are Immoral and greedy, I think landlords are immoral and greedy. It's not my choice though what people do and I don't get to tell them what they can and can't do.

But yes, when they migrate to UC she will have to look for work, so I don't know why everyone is so up in arms. It will happen.

She’s probably just nervous because she’s been out of work so long.

I don’t get the six kids and stay on UC thing though, if you had 2 you could work towards improving your family circumstances in a 4 person household. 6 kids means you pretty much guarntee that you will never be financially independent and stable. I mean the government can change the rules at anytime and you can find yourself in a bind pretty quickly.

Basically though, it's tough shit. It's not your choice no matter how much you don't like it.

In my experience there is definitely a cohort of women who think working for a living is beneath them, your sister sounds like one of them.

Well yeah, but this is mumsnet, not the house of commons. Exchanging opinions is kind of how it works.

Yeah, I'm not sure why people are so pissed off though as she will be having to look for work soon, so problem solved. And she won't be getting anything for the younger kids anyway as they were born after the 2 child benefit cap! So she's not claiming for 6 kids.

Also, feeding 8 people on £25k plus top up benefits for probably only 2 or 3 kids? That sounds miserable as heck. The envy is just ridiculous. How many people on this thread would actually want that life? It's just another thing to moan about.

You're confusing envy with judgement.

Nah, there's definitely envy there. Look at the amount of posters saying they would like to not work so much.

Envy of the ability to stay at home perhaps. Not of the 6 kids on benefits part.

Ultimately though, shouldn't poor people be able to make the same life choices as rich ones? No one condemns a rich woman for sah and having 6 kids and generally she isn't more deserving than the poor woman. Shes just fortunate if married to a man who earns enough to support them. Wage rates aren't linked to how hard a person works or how deserving they are as people - it's mostly just luck where you end up working and how much you get paid.

Actually I think there's plenty of judgement around having lots of children regardless of how rich you are.

Except this family isn't workless. They actually have a very traditional, even model, set up with dad going to work and mum staying home to look after the children.

I think it's ridiculous to suggest that everyone should have the same choices irrespective of their means.

lol yes, I'd love to live in a mansion with an indoor heated pool, I don't know why my lack of millions does not allow me to do so!

Sadly if you rely on others to support you that support can be taken away. If the man could sup[port his family without benefits they would have the choice to continue that way.

You're missing my point there @OutsideLookingOut
Obviously if you don't have lots of money, you end up making different choices that if you did have millions, but being rich or not is largely down to luck for many people. I'm just raising the thought that maybe it's not right to morally condemn someone because their family isn't fortunate enough to be wealthy, if you wouldn't condemn the lucky rich family for the same thing.
This is a family where the husband is working full time - I think the main problem is that wages in this country don't allow a person to support their families and have to be topped up with tax revenue. Really, the husband's employer should have to pay an actual living wage, or housing/utilities costs should be brought down so that normal people can afford them.

Wage suppression is a real issue, that's true. But it's never been realistic to expect to properly support a family of 8 on one below average wage.

Not many people’s wages stretch to supporting 6 children and a SAHP on a single wage. And nor should they, particularly.

Agree with you that wages are low and of course having money may not make one more deserving but I think your conclusion from this is false.

Like with the mansion, if I could get tax payers to buy it for me that would be right because you wouldn't condemn a rich person for buying one?