To think she should look for work?

[Daisydoodo]

my sister is on the migration from tax credits to universal credit. Her husband works and earns around £25k a year and does not aspire to earn anymore she has 6 children 3 over 16 and 3 5-16years she was complaining today that she may be expected to start looking for work when she migrates and how she thinks it’s unfair as she is only just getting her life back now the 5yo is in full time school. AIBU to tell her to get a grip and get a job? I feel awful for saying it but it’s getting on my nerves as I was expected to return after 6 months mat leave. Should the UC system force her to look for work

What makes you think £25k isn’t a full time wage? Some posters on here have no idea of the reality of most people’s lives.

I agree. There are loads of mumsnetters who think that earning a 6 figure salary is normal. It isn't for most people.

That's fair @OutsideLookingOut
I wasn't really think about material purchases though, just choices over family size and whether one parent should be able to sah to parent. If wealthy parents can make that decision because it's what they want for their family, it seems mean that a family with one ft worker can't also have that choice.

I do think there's a difference between families where one person is working full time but not earning much and families where neither parent is making any effort to financially support their children.

@SisterSabotage

What's wrong with being a copywriter or a community lead or a housing worker? Why only servitude on the lowest rung?

Someone with six children who has never worked (or not for many years) is never going to get a job as a community organiser or copywriter. Not in a million years.

I agree that this woman should not be complaining about being encouraged off benefits but you are being absurd if you think she can re-enter the workforce in a graduate level job. A degree of realism is needed.

100, 200 years ago a family of 8 on less below average income would have lived in abject poverty. And the mum would have worked in some capacity throughout. People have always been free to have as many children as they want, it's only in very recent history that those children have been provided for by other people. It's not mean to think parents ought not to have more children than they can provide for.

Only 80 years ago my grandmother and siblings had the rugs off the floor on the beds. I don't know about her mother but her eldest brother worked before school in the mornings.

We've hopefully moved on from what was normal 100 years ago though.

Yes we have. And thank goodness we have. But it is still irresponsible, and she should still need to get a job.

Yeah miserable as heck, boring low value food! But that's what they chose for their children, a lifestyle choice of their own making.

No life doesn't work that way, we wanted four children, had two because we couldn't afford four.

My friend who is married to a GP, they could afford four, so she had four, when the youngest went to school she went back to work.

@Beezknees pointed out feeding six when low income will be a miserable low quality diet, but some parents don't care about that, they just want to have six kids, in this instance to avoid work it would seem

I honestly don't know how people manage on that income. Even with top ups, it's got to be really hard.

@Beezknees I'm not worried about working so much, I'm not envious but angry that my taxes are being used for this type of thing.

Benefits are a total necessity and absolutely needed, but not for this type of person and their tribe of kids.... they made a choice, why the hell am I paying for this!

Not so hard they stopped

At

1,3,3,4 or 5! So to my mind they're getting too much!

I think you protest too much.

@WithACatLikeTread I think you're reaching a lot.....

Yeah I'd love to be eating low rate food, no holidays, watching every penny....the having to get a job, I probably won't like..

Rather than having a balanced life with two children (now adult), great holidays, good income and still managed to each work, with minimum childcare and equal home life balance in terms of housework etc.

Yeah, I'm really fucked off I couldn't have six and stay home instead

If this is a genuine post, it Sounds like she kept having children to avoid going out to work. Pretty irresponsible, taxpayers picking up the tab for life choices..

And that's the choices they made, and frankly how, or if, they manage is no one else's problem. We didn't want a hard life, so we had fewer children.

I have someone in my close family who willingly chose to have a very large family with known genetic conditions herself plus some conditions with a presumed genetic link - she admits to all that this means she will not have to work as the children get dla and she is their carer. She always wanted to be a sahm and knew this would mean she could be (she can’t work herself and was terrified to be forced into it so this is her ‘career choice’ ). She’s actually really lovely and does an amazing job with her dc but her blunt honesty about the whole situation does cause resentment with others

Well without the people who staff that depressingly unambitious list those services wouldn't exist for people with their amazingly ambitious jobs to use.
But hey, nothing like people demanding and using those services and taking the piss out of the people providing them is there to validate and amuse themselves is there?

Except that currently she actually won't have to look for work as her husband earns enough for her to be in the light touch group. This may change in the future but for now I highly doubt she will be asked to look for work. Plus they'll be getting a lot of money from UC if most of those six kids were born before 2017 and they get a child element for each, so unlikely she will feel she needs to work because they are hard up.

If the kids were all born before 2017 they will be getting six child elements on tax credits and on Uc when they switch. That is a heck of a lot of money even before elements for rent ( if they rent) and parents are added in. Deductions for his earnings wouldn't be much on such a low wage. A couple now having a large family would not get any money for a third or more child unless a multiple birth so yes someone trying to have a large family now would be a lot worse off. But for this family that's not the case. Obviously as the kids leave education the amount will drop but six kids on a claim for years on end is a massive cost for society.

If we assume all 6 are still in education, 5 born before 2017, they will be far more comfortable then many assume

Yes Uc child elements alone for six kids would be £1662.90 a month, then parents standard elements and rent elements on top with a few hundred deducted for earnings. Honestly it's an enormous amount they would be getting on top of wages. No wonder she doesn't want or need to work. People say benefits are low and they really are for single people but really not in cases like this.

Equivalent to a salary of £55-60k by my rough estimation. Depending on housing, could be much much more. The struggle will probably only really come as the kids grow up and move out.

They won't contribute much if they're like their parents