To think she should look for work?

[Daisydoodo]

my sister is on the migration from tax credits to universal credit. Her husband works and earns around £25k a year and does not aspire to earn anymore she has 6 children 3 over 16 and 3 5-16years she was complaining today that she may be expected to start looking for work when she migrates and how she thinks it’s unfair as she is only just getting her life back now the 5yo is in full time school. AIBU to tell her to get a grip and get a job? I feel awful for saying it but it’s getting on my nerves as I was expected to return after 6 months mat leave. Should the UC system force her to look for work

She will be expected not only to look but prove she's been looking and applying for work as well as after some time made to do back in to work programmes and courses or they will be sanctioned and lose quite a fair bit of money.

I'd love to have my life back after working full time for 43 years. As it is I have 5 more years before retirement.
I also only had one child because that is all I could afford.
I don't understand people who live like this.

Only just getting her life back?

You could point out to her that for most people "life" is going to work.

Also, that having children is life.

She's been living her life the whole time.

YANBU

It's an annoying comment but I expect behind the moaning of unfairness there's some apprehension & fear about returning to the workforce if has been a SAHP a long time. While a job could be positive for her, coping with change can be difficult for many and the way the job centre deals with people can be more stressful rather than supportive.

A household of 8 must take some running though especially if been daft enough to set herself up as the mum that takes care of everything for everyone.

I dont know how she could work with so many kids at home.
It's not her fault you had to work 6 months after your child birth.

And in living that life has made a choice to have 6 children.

Her time to have children all of school age could have come (from the ages) over a decade ago had she had fewer children.

Choices and consequences.

Benefits are a safety net not a lifestyle choice.

As a start her partner could also pull his finger out and look to earn more than £25k or alternatively share childcare (as on that wages he's not working full time) so she can also work.

Lazy bum should have been working years and years ago.

Ridiculous having 6 kids on such a tiny household income.

Yes, too right she should look for work! Why should the state pick up the tab because she and her partner like having babies?

Oh I don't know, if you get greedy people like this having 6 kids they cannot afford and getting benefits because they chose not to stop, it means restricted benefits on maternity for others?

So yes she can look to herself!

Why can't she work with so many children at home? They'll have to do stuff after work and long into the evenings and give up any free time and hobbies etc to make sure cooking, laundry etc is done. A lifestyle choice they made and I for one do not want to pay for!

Six children on £25k, totally ridiculous! Some may think that she continued having children to avoid work...

.

Yep should definitely look for work.

I know one other person who didn't work who always says about getting her life back/never having any time for herself/etc etc in front of the kids and I feel really sorry for them because they're lovely kids and they didn't choose to be born 🤦‍♀️ stinks of resentment to me!

Benefits are a safety net not a lifestyle choice!

So choose to have 6 kids with a husband who earns £25k and expects top ups from everyone else?

Also 4 kids age 16+ are hardly heavily dependent on her like a young child.

She's not doing nappies is she?!

Her children will end up contributing to society, we need more children for all the expected elderly in care.

@SaladDays2024 will they, though?

They are likely to each have lots of kids and live off government top ups, as this is the example they've been set.

Exactly this.

As a start her partner could also pull his finger out and look to earn more than £25k or alternatively share childcare (as on that wages he's not working full time) so she can also work.

£25k on a 40 hour week is £12 an hour. Minimum wage is less than that.

Over half of tax payers are net recipients rather than net providers. We cannot know whether or not these children will go into elderly care.

I didn't mean they will work as carers, the society needs more children to generate taxes to raise funding fot public services..particularly as we're out of the EU.

6 kids is a lot of work.

But part of the deal for state help is that you look for work - she is welcome to get her life back if they can cope without state support.

This is MN - no doubt they all cosleep (although she and DP still make time for plenty of sex to produce more), breast feed until secondary school and at least 3 will have SN. Hahahahaha
OP is right - get off your arse and get a job!

I think you'd be pretty silly to give your sister your"advice" unless you want to fall out.

Just leave it. If she's required to look for work then she will learn that soon enough.

Stick with being her sister; she's probably feeling worried about how to gain employment and manage the family. A little encouragement wouldn't go amiss.

You are right. Sister needs to get a grip and find a job.
It's not fair to all the tax payers.
She has been living her chosen life for 20 years and she can choose her job.
She would have great cooking and people organisational skills..
Catering company
Lolly pop lady
Macdonalds
Hospitality
The railways
Laundramat
After school club

Lord, what a depressingly unambitious list.

I'm not convinced this is a genuine post. Looks like a set up for benefits bashing to me.

I feel sorry for you both. Sorry that your sister is so harshly judged by you and that her own sister has little empathy for her. And sorry for you that you view life as a competition and that if you struggle everyone should.

I think you should mind your own business.