Thoughts on what I seen on partners phone.

[Treesinsnow]

I have posted before about a message my partners ex sent him and his reply. Majority of posters said they would be worried and his the rare exchange of one message between them was fine and handled well. However, I have not seen that they have again been chatting and he asked her to send him a photograph!!

I just don't know what to think. In my last post about this, posters said he was kindly giving her the brush off but asking her to send him a photo! How would that be giving her the brush off? Could he still be attracted to her? Why would he want a photo of her if he wasn't?

I don't want to throw the towel in just yet. I just want to know what why he wanted a photo of her. He is not going to exactly tell me the truth if I ask him.

Tbh why are you wasting your time on here then? He hasn’t physically cheated on you (that you know off) but he has still betrayed you and your trust. That’s if you do trust him because of you did you wouldn’t be on his phone. He is messaging someone behind your back if that isn’t enough of a betrayal I don’t know what is.

it was her doing the flirting and he just asked for the photo

Asking her for a photo IS flirting, FFS. They're flirting with each other.

He has not cheated on me.

It's only a matter of time, though, isn't it?

If he wasn't interested in his ex, he wouldn't be flirting with her and asking for photos. Wake up.

If he is still attracted to her/still wants her then why isn't he with her?

You cannot be this naive. He doesn't want a monogamous relationship with either her OR you. He wants to shag around. That's why he's sending flirty messages to his ex-girlfriend and asking for her photos.

I'm wondering if you've seen the photo she sent back? Because I really don't think it's likely to be the same kind of photo you'd send to, eg, your mum or your best mate, somehow.

You still need to ask him whether he lies or tells the truth surely you will tell if he’s cheated by his response or body language

They're still shagging. Or want to.

Get some self respect fgs.

No, but everyone here HAS told you the truth, which is that he wants a photo of her because he still fancies her and is considering cheating with her.

When he says 'a photo' he doesn't mean a corporate headshot, you know. He's trying to get her to send him wank bank material.

You are massively in denial here and it's painful to read.

Based on the OP's responses so far, I don't think she's necessarily the best at reading those sorts of signals.

He wants a photo because he still fancies her, he is absolutely loving the ego boost of her flirting with him. He is not an innocent bloke he knows exactly what he's doing. Stay with him by all means but just so you know - he's a complete wrong un.

Doesn't that already tell you where the relationship is though?? The fact you know he wouldn't tell the truth anyway? Come on, stop deluding yourself. You know this isn't working out.

OP I am struggling to understand your confusion. Your bf would quite happily have sex with his ex if it was on the table (or floor or bed or sofa.... )

He asked her to send a photo to gauge whether she wants to have sex with him too. If she sends a provocative pic he will know that she probably does.

Are you going to come back here telling us they spent the night together and asking what it could possibly mean?

He's having his EGO massaged. He likes the attention.
Otherwise he'd shut her down.

Don't you think you deserve better than this ?
He's obviously thinking about her .. how does that feel when you snuggle up to go to sleep at night ?
Can you continue with this level of betrayal?
Would I ? Would I hell

He wants to see if she's still fit and if he still fancies her, he wants to imagine himself with her as she looks now, he wants to forge some kind of intimacy which is what the act of sending someone a photo of yourself achieves, and he's testing the water to see if she's still interested. Any or all of the above reasons would work.

Why do you think he's asking his ex for a photo?

Well if he tells you the truth you should dump him.
If he lies you should dump him for lying.

Ps. You should pick your self esteem off the floor your behaviour mirrors that of a desperate person.

😂😂😂😂😂

Op, you need to ditch this bastard. Obviously he’s keeping the lines of communication open.

😂 sure… it’s all her. Takes two to tango.

In the kindest possible way, OP, you need to have a serious head wobble over this guy. A good guy, who loved you, wouldn't be asking for pics of ex-girlfriends, or anyone else. Unless it's a holiday snap of you all, of his kids, or something.
Really, get rid of him, grow your self-esteem and self-worth, and only then consider a new relationship.
Best of luck

Yeh, what's next? She just fell onto his cock, repeatedly? Nothing to do with him. Honest guv.

Ok then why are you posting on here? Gfc. I swear some of you females just revel in the hardship and agony.

One day in the future you will regret not ditching him. He is untrustworthy and it would seem can easily pull the wool over your eyes.

Of course you should dump him. If my DH asked for another's woman's photo for his wank bank he'd be out

You keep wasting your life with him. The more you are with this wrong person, The less you have time left to be with the right one.

Why bother asking when you aren't going to LTB? He clearly fancies his ex. He's at least emotionally cheating on you. I'd consider flirting in such a way (especially when he knows how his ex feels) worse than a drunken one-night stand. If I found out DH was interacting with anyone else like that, it would be it, even after thirty years and 3DC. Being disloyal is a line for me.

Sorry, you don’t want to dump him? Why not?! His behaviour is appalling