Do men really do this?

[pinkiepie87]

I recently went on a date (we didn't have sex) I really liked him, we got talking about how long we've been single etc

He told me today that he's had sex with a few women recently, he didn't fancy any of them - in fact he found them unattractive. He was drunk but even when drunk didn't fancy them.

I asked him how on earth did he get hard, stay hard to "perform" and finish if he didn't like them? Also he said he gave them foreplay so why would he touch someone's body he didn't like? He said he didn't really like their bodies either...

Anyway he said all men do this for different reasons,

Now I want to give up dating.

AIBU?

Any hole's a goal ... for many men 🙄

What makes you think the women were looking for more than a shag, though? A one-night-stand with someone who is up for a one-night-stand isn’t using them.

I’ve definitely slept with a couple of men I didn’t really fancy. No idea how attractive they found me, and I can’t say I really care. We had sex, the sex was fun enough, that was all either of us really seemed to require.

This is why sex dolls exist

I’m interested to know how he introduced the subject. Had this happened between your date and you talking today or had it happened before your date? I’d probably be thinking more about what he thought he was gaining by talking to me about it (rather than how it had worked iyswim) it may be that it hadn’t happened at all. I’m trying to picture a scenario where a man would be talking to me about playing with someone else’s boobs

Ew why the fuck would that conversation even happen 🤢

I think he phrased it badly, he is obviously no Emily Brontë when it comes to language. I don’t think he comes across well. However, neither men nor women have to be with the worlds most beautiful person to get off during sex.
Logically I could have sex with an ugly, fat man and orgasm so long as he knows where my vital organs are and how to use his hands.
Many people do this. Maybe he isn’t that good looking himself who knows.
I think talking like he does would turn me off though.
Why on earth would he not just say I’ve had casual sex over the last 6 months, then end it there?
I also agree with the earlier comment that many men don't particularly want children. If women insisted on not having children then what would they do? All fight over the ones who do? I doubt it. I think most men would accept it.

They might have been using him too.

I've known men to have sex out of politeness, even if they didn't fancy the person. This sounds different though.

Who says he was telling truth? Men have insecurities too maybe he was doing a puff-up for you in his own misguided way. A guy once told me about his threesome, years later to find it never happened, the poor lad got into a car accident on the way there(speeding incase you were wondering) and never made it. He's DH now and is a wonderful man, just had a bit of low self esteem. Thought if other women wanted him(in theory) well then I would too!

I’ve been with dh for a very long time. Before we dated, I also had sex with at least a couple of men I wasn’t particularly attracted to. There was an attraction of some description… or maybe a desire. They wanted sex. So did I.

Yes it’s hilarious that some posters seem stuck in Georgian England and think women only have sex if they are under the impression there is love and commitment afterwards. Sometimes women just want to have sex 🤷🏼‍♀️

Tbh plenty of men and women use people for sex in that way. I couldn’t imagine sleeping with someone I didn’t find attractive but people manage it. The fact he’s telling you this on a first date is bizarre, for starters I thought a first date is about getting to know someone, I wouldn’t dream of discussing ex partners in a first date. It also screams arrogance (or stupidity)

Any hole is a goal. Repugnant scrote

Yes, and have fucked holes in fences, vacuum cleaner hoses, etc, etc. The orgasm is the thing for them.

I probably have a different opinion to most, I'm a sex worker and I know that the majority of men who go into a brothel, not knowing what's inside, will probably still stay even though they are not particularly attracted to the lady working. What I'm trying to say is that sex with a random is purely a physical thing...and I think the fact he has been open about this is a good thing and if he's keen to continue dating you then it probably means he is attracted to you, both physically and personality wise, I don't believe it's a bad thing he's admitted this to you ...