To think people are too quick to say LTB?

[Scotcheggsontoast]

Talking about in real life as well as online.

Don't get me wrong I know it's often the right thing to do.

But I think it's very easy to get swept up in the whole, you don't need him, life will be so much better without him etc etc..

But do you know what the grass isn't always greener, and when 3/4 years down the line you're still single, having to stay in every night as you're a single parent, friends are all busy in their own lives, ones that were very present in your life encouraging you to LTB have all but disappeared..

I know it's everyone's responsibility to make their own decisions, but especially when someone is at a vulnerable point in their lives (ie. just had a baby, in lockdown, etc etc) I think people should be a bit more careful about giving out all this advice about how you're life will be so much better without your partner.

This is an interesting point and one not made often enough. Some people just have more need for company than others.

If you are a person who needs company and gets lonely easily (I am), then there may be more value in putting up with a less than perfect relationship- not abusive of course but just not perfect - for the sake of having on-tap company.

Conversely if you are someone who is fine with or even enjoys being alone a lot of the time, then you will be less willing to compromise and put up with faults, as the company just isn’t worth that much to you.

Me and DS have had a lovely day today, nothing special but just chilled and nice. I know things would be way more stressful if me and his Dad had stayed together.

It's just so easy to have a wobble. Especially when you get a set back / not so nice comment from a friend etc.

Assumed it would be a linear process and that I'd be totally fine by now - but it really can be challenging being single!! And the further you get away from the breakup, when the relief has gone and you've started to forget how bad it was... That's when the regret can start to kick in I think..

Excluding situations of abuse, adultery etc, it should be possible to accept that many relationships are imperfect, but actually obtain good quality advice on how to make the relationship continue and improve where there is willingness to do so. Just because someone is complaining about a relationship that has been bad for a while, with a partner who isn't all that great, doesn't mean that there can't be hope and a way forward.